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Boyfriend won't go down on me...

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Nope, if a guy doesn't chuckle when a girl straight-up demands something like that of him then frankly he is likely so whipped it's embarrassing :mute:

He said ask, not demand, there's a huge difference. You can ask in a very sexy way, i.e. dirty talk, but demanding it in a way that makes the partner feel used or embarrassed is obviously not going to work out.

Original post by Foo.mp3

Healthy, adult relationships are about communication and occasional compromise

Exactly, so the OP needs to communicate that she wants oral sex.

Reply 21

miser

Original post by Foo.mp3

Nope, if a guy doesn't chuckle when a girl straight-up demands something like that of him then frankly he is likely so whipped it's embarrassing :mute:

Turn the tables, imagine you were advising a guy to tell a girl to go down on him.. suddenly it becomes unpalatable advice. No reason why that should be any different for girls. Healthy, adult relationships are about communication and occasional compromise, not dictation and occasional (male) subordination, nor tit-for-tat games regarding 'sexual favours' :rolleyes:

I think you've misunderstood me if you think I meant demanding it. But it's inconsequential. We agree it's an issue of communication.

Reply 22

XMaramena

Your boyfriend's mean. Tell him to get his sorry arse down there!

Reply 23

macromicro

Original post by al_mohajer

Be smart ...
Don't go down for him again. He would be surprise. if you continue not going down for him, eventually he will open up this matter for ya. Then, you take the opportunity and tell him in his face why don't you do it for me, but you want me to do it for ya. He will get the message. You just need to be patient!

That's not smart, it's immature and petty. I'm not sure why people are trying to over-complicate something so simple: she literally just has to talk to her boyfriend about what makes her climax and ask for him to give oral sex. Any boyfriend would want to please his partner because it's pretty insulting if you cannot satisfy your partner's needs. It also makes you quite selfish and distant not to be proactive and considerate about that sort of thing; it is in part a product of the 'lad culture', i.e. those who attempt to hide their crippling insecurities by deluding themselves that they only have sex for their own benefit and are horribly scared about being labelled "whipped", despite the fact that any self-respecting and secure man would want to please his partner and enjoy this achievement as much as climaxing himself. In other words, OP, if your boyfriend is secure, confident in his abilities, and a reasonable, considerate man, then simply be more open and honest with him. There's nothing worse than playing games, making subtle hints, and beating around the bush (pardon the pun).

The bastard...

Original post by ShotsFired-9941

See it from his point of view. You had several bfs. That means several cars of various skin and sizes have been driven to that workshop for lubrication, and repeatedly.

Really not a very nice thing to lick when you look at it that way.

what about girls going down on guys who have had numerous girls?

Reply 26

frankieboy

Original post by ShotsFired-9941

You don't know much about the human body, do you?

Reply 27

Anonymous #2

My boyfriend didn't do it for ages (6 months) and then he eventually just offered one day.

Reply 28

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

Suggest you re-read :erm:

He said "tell" which is ambiguous I suppose and seems to fall between your authoritative interpretation of "demand' and my more generous interpretation of "ask" but I think the clear implication, and his subsequent explanation, was indeed "ask". It's really not that complicated to be honest; I think we're all generally on the same page.

Reply 29

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

Intellectual honesty and humility are virtues; methinks y'all would do well to remember that :top2:

Likewise.

Original post by Foo.mp3

The clear implication from his subsequent rewording is that he meant to say ask,* yes, and we are indeed all on the same page in that respect :smile:

Initial and subsequent. You interpreted it incorrectly, I interpreted it correctly based on the initial wording; his rewording then clarified in order to correct your mistake and confirm my interpretation.

Reply 30

Costanzas

At least you're getting sex :frown:

Reply 31

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

I'm sorry?

Spoiler

Yet not in this thread it seems, hence my recommendation to remember in order to maintain this relative consistency that you boast. I will accept your unintentionally prophetic apology on this basis.

Original post by Foo.mp3

I'd look into the distinction between intended and literal meanings, you may learn something :facepalm2:

Likewise - in this case, it was intended yet you interpreted it literally and incorrectly, which would have been easily forgivable had you not continued digging your hole out of stubborn pride.

Reply 32

frankieboy

Or you could consider getting some flavoured lube.

Reply 33

frankieboy

Original post by macromicro

Yet not in this thread it seems, hence my recommendation to remember in order to maintain this relative consistency that you boast. I will accept your unintentionally prophetic apology on this basis.

Likewise - in this case, it was intended yet you interpreted it literally and incorrectly, which would have been easily forgivable had you not continued digging your hole out of stubborn pride.

This post is too highbrow for this thread :tongue:

Reply 34

macromicro

Original post by frankieboy

This post is too highbrow for this thread :tongue:

Cunnilingus is an exquisite and esoteric art so I beg to differ, Frankie.

Reply 35

frankieboy

Original post by macromicro

Cunnilingus is an exquisite and esoteric art so I beg to differ, Frankie.

I bow down to your eloquent superiority, sir :biggrin:

Don't forget to lick the alphabet. The Chinese alphabet on special occasions.

Reply 36

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

See above re: literal basis for his mistake. I freely admit that my interpretation did not tally with his intended meaning but that was patently his bad, not mine; to attempt to argue to the contrary is utterly ridiculous, this is a matter of pretty elemental English + a modicum of common sense :roll eyes:

Yet my interpretation did indeed tally with his intended meaning, which puts your opinion of his mistake in something of a predicament. That is, I don't believe using somewhat ambiguous language (the infamous "tell" which is both the cause and sustainment of this petty exchange) is wrong if the implication/intention is clear enough, which it was for me. To find that "utterly ridiculous" is therefore highly questionable, not to mention melodramatic.

Original post by Foo.mp3

Rarely do I boast :u:

I don't doubt it; though in that moment you did.

Original post by Foo.mp3

Supposing you genuinely do not get it (anything’s possible), allow me to draw you an analogy:

When sitting an exam, let’s say in Economics, if you conflate e.g. growth with inflation in an answer and get marked down because of it, do you then go to the examiner and tell him it’s his mistake but that it’s easily forgivable? No, you do not, if you have a shred of sense (never mind decency)

Only on TSR do we see an ostensibly serious analogy between off-hand remarks and academia! We do not live by a mark scheme; our free interactions and communication may very well be subtle and nuanced and subjective and therefore dependent on interpretation, but by no means analogous to an exam.

Original post by Foo.mp3

My only agenda is truth/justice; I’m not overly keen on looking proud/pedantic but alas y’all rather forced my hand

And that is an agenda we share, though it is one thing to talk of virtues and vices and another thing altogether to display and avoid them.

Reply 37

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

Know when you're beaten amigo, it's getting embarrassing now :mute:

Irony tastes delicious. Is it getting dark down there?

Original post by Foo.mp3

Tautological comments about subjectivity earn you nil points :pierre:

(see 'common sense' above)

In which case we ought to deduct points from your pointing to interpretation, though why this ruling is in place god only knows; subjectivity is the core of every human interaction.

Reply 38

macromicro

Original post by Foo.mp3

Hence tautology :congrats:

It's not tautological. What it is, is an explanation of your mistake in this thread, i.e. your misinterpretation of the post compared to my correct interpretation (see 'subjectivity' above), after which you took out your trusty spade until you were neck deep in soil.

This has been riveting, and while you put in a courageous effort - until the exam analogy of course, though I won't hold your quintessential TSRian nature against you due to the location of this debate - I am as bored of the issue as I am of you and of myself, which is lose-lose-lose, particularly in a thread of this nature. Goodnight my friend, I have some cunnilingus to enjoy, and wish the same for you.

Reply 39

narusku

Original post by Anonymous

We've only been together officially for a short while, but he's gone down on me only once in that time, even though I often go down on him several times in one night. He's mentioned it when we've sexted in the past but he just never does it. He does use his fingers but it's not the same for me, I find it a lot harder to finish and it's really frustrating. Ive told him before that the most pleasure i get is from oral... I've never had an issue with guys going down on me before, in fact most of the guys I've been with did it very willingly. I don't want to have to outright ask him to do it because I think that's kinda unsexy... What should I do? :/