A guy called Warren Farrell tried a role-reversal that will terrify most women in which men took on a women’s role, and women took on a man’s role. The feminists LOVED him for the role reversal experiments he did with men, and HATED him for the role reversal experiments he did with women.
Role Reversal For Women
He had the women ask men out. Women had to call the man, plan the evening, and initiate every step of the date.
The men were told to be entirely passive, putting the burden of the evening on the woman. It was up to the women to risk rejection for any physical or sexual contact she wanted, with the men accepting or rejecting the women’s advances.
Many of the women said they were unable to listen to what the man was saying because they were so worried about getting rejected. Instead of connecting with men, the women found themselves constantly thinking “How do I get this guy not to say no?”
Every time I’ve told this story to man, he’s burst out laughing in recognition. Just as most women worry about their looks, most men worry about getting rejected.
Role Reversal For Men
Warren had men participate in a beauty contest. Male contestants had to present themselves shirtless, and have women vote on who was the most attractive.
At first, the men loved the attention. However, as men began to get voted off for being less attractive than other contestants, the men became self-conscious. They felt hurt and rejected when they were voted off.
After the experiment, the men had a greater understanding of the insecurity women experience around their body.
Double Standards
While the men were willing to do the beauty contest, most of feminists, even after watching the men go through the beauty contest, walked out when it came time to participate in the role-reversal date.
While women’s issues with body image are constantly explored in mass media, very little has been written about men’s issues with rejection that isn’t demeaning or shaming.
The only group that treat’s men’s fear of rejection with anything resembling empathy is the pick up industry. It’s not surprising given the amount of rejection men face.
If women expect men to understand their struggles with body image, they should also seek to understand men’s issues with rejection and game.
Most women who criticize men’s pick-up tactics have never tried to approach a stranger, win their trust, and ask them out. My intention isn’t to give up roles, but simply to understand the others experience better and I wouldn’t want to change either.