loneliness

dont have any close friends and feel like im the only one that tries to make an effort with other people and every time im close to someone i end up getting attached and they cut me off eventually

Hi, I'm sorry you feel like this... It sucks when your constantly making the effort and you get very little or nothing in return.. no matter what age you are there is always a chance to make new friends, whether thats when you go to college, uni or a new job eventually you will click with someone and make a friend or friends for life..

Keep making the effort with any new people you meet and maybe join some clubs and things with people who share similar interests.. I hope it gets better for you and it will, it just takes time! For now though, keep talking on here and try the new clubs there's always people who are up for a conversation!

So sorry to hear you’re going through This
I swear I’ve seen so many posts like this recently.
I’m in the same boat so you’re not alone.
Like the TSR member said above, you can make new friends at classes/clubs or meets up like on meet-up.com
Obviously this lockdown is making it hard for us to go our there and make new friends so maybe in a few months?
Channel your free time into something good for you as an individual like work on hobbies that you haven’t really done before. I just try and keep myself busy doing things alone cuz I’m the only person I’ve got right now so may as well be there for myself if no1 else is eh?

I totally get you on the whole getting too attached thing. I put a wall up first till the other person shows a sign of trust and love but then I open my arms too quickly after that and become attached. Maybe they’re scared or creeped out but they’ve never said so I don’t even know why people repel away from me. And I guess we will never know.

Sometimes I find myself awake at night thinking about they I don’t have any friends but my siblings manage to be in a group (they’re 18 and 21 so they’ve had these mates since the beginning of high school- which makes me feel bad). But it’s an on and off thing so sometimes I’m happy and sometimes I’m not.

But definitely when you find that tribe, you’re gonna be so happy that youll be mega shocked, thinking “I never thought it’d be possible to feel 10000% happy with these new friends of mine”. Patience is key

Now I’m thinking, would be nice if people on here who are all feeling lonely and lacking friends, could miraculously meet up one day in person and form a tribe. It’s a pipe dream but a nice thought to have.

hey 👋🏻
you are not the only one going through this, okay? at the moment i’ve been feeling similarly also. just keep being you and putting the effort in and one day you will meet the most fantastic people who love you for you and it’ll all be worth it 😊

Well why do u want to have friends so badly? In my opinion they are overrated. Don't get me wrong, friends are some of the cool things that life has to offer, like experiencing moments with, going cinemas doing stuff and interacting with people - they're all sick stuff. But then you realize, you can do most things that you'd do with a friend by yourself. Want to talk to someone? Write down your thoughts and you'll slowly start learning about yourself. Want to go cinemas/restaurants/biking? Do it solo. Spending time alone is at first daunting, but I promise you'll get very comfortable after some time. And if you have family around you, speak to them. Not about your struggles, rather what you enjoy doing, what you look forward to, positive things. It is healthy to talk about mental health matters, but if you spend too much time focusing on a negative issue, you get tunnel vision and that's what your outlook will be, someone who just has problems making friends etc. Now if you really want to create friends, I'd say replying to people's stories, because people love talking about themselves and what they're into, it's a good way to make conversations. And one last thing, what you see on social media does not reflect real life hands down. I always saw people having the time of their life at a party to then tell me the next day how dead it was. Don't be fooled my socials.