Saw gf for the first time without makeup

Hey, last Friday I saw my gf for the first time without makeup on my way back from college. She doesn't go to the same one as me but she genuinely didn't look like the same person at all. I didn't even know it was her honestly until she kept calling my name whilst I was sat in the bus station waiting for the bus home.

The problem is that I'm not sure if I'm attracted to her looks without it. Idk why, honestly and I've tried to get over it over the last few days and I'm struggling to. Hence why I want some advice on here. Is it worth staying with a girl whom you aren't attracted to at all without makeup? Or do you think it's not worth it? I know I'll be called shallow but like I said I don't know how to get over it. She's a good person still but part of me feels like a relationship where you aren't attracted to your partner is more of a friendship than a relationship and with me not being attracted to her, makes me question whether it falls into this category.

Reply 1

Surnia

20

So you are so shallow you are only attracted to a girl for her looks? Seriously, that can't be the only reason you are with her. How does whether or not she wears make-up affect her personality?

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

You don’t find her physically attractive - It is what it is.

I suggest breaking up with her to not cause future issues later down the line that would only hurt her.

Reply 3

Anonymous #3

I mean... has to be a troll.

Whether a woman has makeup or not never changes anything for me.

This kind of mindset that you have to me is of someone who doesn't look at a person and notice their personality. When I look at a person, I don't really see their looks as such, makeup would never change how they are perceived. It is just a small layer on top to enhance some features. I see everything about them, their mannerisms, the shape of their facial features... not really whether their lips are red or not you know...

It is as if you only look at their looks purely. You just have that snapshot of what their face looks like in your mind with makeup, and that is how they are perceived by you, nothing more. So if it changes then you don't recognise them anymore... Super weird... also unbelievably shallow.

Reply 4

SupposedlyIronic

21

Original post by Anonymous

Hey, last Friday I saw my gf for the first time without makeup on my way back from college. She doesn't go to the same one as me but she genuinely didn't look like the same person at all. I didn't even know it was her honestly until she kept calling my name whilst I was sat in the bus station waiting for the bus home.

The problem is that I'm not sure if I'm attracted to her looks without it. Idk why, honestly and I've tried to get over it over the last few days and I'm struggling to. Hence why I want some advice on here. Is it worth staying with a girl whom you aren't attracted to at all without makeup? Or do you think it's not worth it? I know I'll be called shallow but like I said I don't know how to get over it. She's a good person still but part of me feels like a relationship where you aren't attracted to your partner is more of a friendship than a relationship and with me not being attracted to her, makes me question whether it falls into this category.

I'd say you'll probably get used to it.

Reply 5

Kawaii.Princess

12

it almost sounds like you only like her for her looks

Reply 6

Slx.24

20

Uhm no it doesn't? How does this person suddenly become a bad guy because of the way he sees his gf after she takes off her makeup? That said the only thing you (OP) can do is think about whether you can get used to it and love her for the way she is with all her looks and personality. Or break up with her. There's no such thing as all personality no looks that's just plain bs. Get used to it guys. You need to be physically attracted to someone to be in a rs with them properly.

Reply 7

DC3566

10

If you are not attracted to her then i would break up with her.

Reply 8

username5428282

21

This seems like bait.

Reply 9

Slx.24

20

Original post by YaliaV123

This seems like bait.

Not seems. Is just stupid

Reply 10

londonmyst

19

That's the reason why I never leave the house without makeup on and no bf has ever seen me with no makeup on.
If you are not attracted to her with the makeup off, feel unable to tell her this and makeup free she no longer meets your basic attraction or relationship dealbreakers- the two of you are not compatible.

Reply 11

.Red

16

Im going to preface this post by saying I understand that most women use makeup in a way to make themselves feel and look more attractive and that makeup is typically just a nice way of enhancing their features. Of course I’ve got nothing against that

But I’m some cases...makeup has the potential to transform a woman’s face. And it’s a bit unfair if you say that we should still be as attracted to the same person once the mask is lifted as we were before especially if the difference is really noticeable

These are just a few examples of what I mean.

https://i.imgur.com/n0CK88e.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/WpvzmFv.jpg

I want to clarify - I’m not saying that these women are ugly or unattractive because they’re not wearing makeup! I’m just saying...makeup is a hell of a drug.

Mhm

OP

Original post by Surnia

So you are so shallow you are only attracted to a girl for her looks? Seriously, that can't be the only reason you are with her. How does whether or not she wears make-up affect her personality?

Not the only reason but looks are a big part yes. Its the same with girls so I dont know why you are acting like they don't too. Many wouldn't date someone who's short or fat or who they aren't attracted to even if they have a good personality that they get along with well. So what's the problem if it's the same with me? I'm confused here. I highly doubt you would either.

I don't treat her differently. Just said that she looks a lot different without it and I don't really find her attractive without it.

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

You don’t find her physically attractive - It is what it is.

I suggest breaking up with her to not cause future issues later down the line that would only hurt her.

Thanks, maybe that's the only way forward.

Original post by Anonymous

I mean... has to be a troll.

Whether a woman has makeup or not never changes anything for me.

This kind of mindset that you have to me is of someone who doesn't look at a person and notice their personality. When I look at a person, I don't really see their looks as such, makeup would never change how they are perceived. It is just a small layer on top to enhance some features. I see everything about them, their mannerisms, the shape of their facial features... not really whether their lips are red or not you know...

It is as if you only look at their looks purely. You just have that snapshot of what their face looks like in your mind with makeup, and that is how they are perceived by you, nothing more. So if it changes then you don't recognise them anymore... Super weird... also unbelievably shallow.

So you are telling me you've dated guys shorter than you, fat and ones you don't find attractive due to their personality? If not then you would also be 'unbelievably shallow' too with that logic.

And I'm not just looking at her looks. I'm just saying that I don't find her attractive without it.

Original post by ashtolga23

I'd say you'll probably get used to it.

Idk, a few days later and I still aren't at all.

Ok, thanks.

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Kawaii.Princess

it almost sounds like you only like her for her looks

So you've dated guys that are a lot shorter than you, guys you don't find attractive, guys that are fat, etc, because of their personality? We both know you haven't and I've rarely seen girls doing this so I don't get why it's a problem that I don't find her physically attractive without makeup.

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Slx.24

Uhm no it doesn't? How does this person suddenly become a bad guy because of the way he sees his gf after she takes off her makeup? That said the only thing you (OP) can do is think about whether you can get used to it and love her for the way she is with all her looks and personality. Or break up with her. There's no such thing as all personality no looks that's just plain bs. Get used to it guys. You need to be physically attracted to someone to be in a rs with them properly.

Yeah I've realised that thank you for the advice. I will tomorrow when I see her in person. Physical attraction is just too important and without it at all it's like saying your friend I guess.

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by DC3566

If you are not attracted to her then i would break up with her.

Yeah I will tomorrow when I see her in person. It's probably the best way to go about things.

Original post by YaliaV123

This seems like bait.

Unfortunately not, I just needed advice and I've got it now.

Original post by londonmyst

That's the reason why I never leave the house without makeup on and no bf has ever seen me with no makeup on.
If you are not attracted to her with the makeup off, feel unable to tell her this and makeup free she no longer meets your basic attraction or relationship dealbreakers- the two of you are not compatible.

Yeah it's for the best for both of us really if we end it here.

Reply 18

Bushyasta

13

Original post by Anonymous

Hey, last Friday I saw my gf for the first time without makeup on my way back from college. She doesn't go to the same one as me but she genuinely didn't look like the same person at all. I didn't even know it was her honestly until she kept calling my name whilst I was sat in the bus station waiting for the bus home.

The problem is that I'm not sure if I'm attracted to her looks without it. Idk why, honestly and I've tried to get over it over the last few days and I'm struggling to. Hence why I want some advice on here. Is it worth staying with a girl whom you aren't attracted to at all without makeup? Or do you think it's not worth it? I know I'll be called shallow but like I said I don't know how to get over it. She's a good person still but part of me feels like a relationship where you aren't attracted to your partner is more of a friendship than a relationship and with me not being attracted to her, makes me question whether it falls into this category.