how do large surgery scars affect attraction?

I'm terrified of ever becoming intimate with a girl cuz of my body. I have undergone multiple surgeries so I have large scars on my chest and stomach that won't ever really go away. I can't help but think any girl that sees them (not visible when I have clothes on obvs) if we ever get to that is going to be put off and leave me.

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I'm terrified of ever becoming intimate with a girl cuz of my body. I have undergone multiple surgeries so I have large scars on my chest and stomach that won't ever really go away. I can't help but think any girl that sees them (not visible when I have clothes on obvs) if we ever get to that is going to be put off and leave me.

If you've read any young adult books you may have realised some girls are crazy for the scarred man. If a girl truly likes you, she wouldn't do that and leave you just because you have scars. If she does then she doesn't deserve you anyway

Reply 2

Zarek

21

By the time your getting to these being seen, there’s no issue really

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

If you've read any young adult books you may have realised some girls are crazy for the scarred man. If a girl truly likes you, she wouldn't do that and leave you just because you have scars. If she does then she doesn't deserve you anyway

I think this is just for superficial, small scars that protagonists in shows have. Mine are thick and large, they're unsightly and can't really be romanticised.

I have heard that "she doesn't deserve you if she leaves you" which is cool and everything but that won't mean much to me if I'm gonna die alone.

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

I think this is just for superficial, small scars that protagonists in shows have. Mine are thick and large, they're unsightly and can't really be romanticised.

I have heard that "she doesn't deserve you if she leaves you" which is cool and everything but that won't mean much to me if I'm gonna die alone.

Relax bro, your personality is more important to how your body looks. Any girl who likes you would be more sympathetic and understanding than being disgusted by your scars.

I've some ugly scars (including surgical) and no one has turned me down over them.

Reply 6

bethany_gribble

5

I feel you, I have a massive one going up the centre of my stomach. But, remember, scars form from acts of bravery. They form from injuries/surgeries that healed and potentially saved your life. They're cool, and have so many stories behind them. Keep that in mind. They aren't things to be ashamed of, they're there to remind you how tough you are :smile:

Reply 7

Old Skool Freak

20

Original post by Anonymous

I'm terrified of ever becoming intimate with a girl cuz of my body. I have undergone multiple surgeries so I have large scars on my chest and stomach that won't ever really go away. I can't help but think any girl that sees them (not visible when I have clothes on obvs) if we ever get to that is going to be put off and leave me.

In the case of something like a One Night Stand, I could perhaps understand where you're coming from.

However, in the context of a relationship, provided she likes you enough, she's not going to be put off by them. Having said that, it might be a good idea to make her aware that you have scars when it looks like things are going to "escalate", so she's not surprised when she rips your shirt off lol.

If and when the time comes, you could test the water by asking how she feels about guys with scars in general early on?

Reply 8

DD big

3

Original post by Anonymous

I'm terrified of ever becoming intimate with a girl cuz of my body. I have undergone multiple surgeries so I have large scars on my chest and stomach that won't ever really go away. I can't help but think any girl that sees them (not visible when I have clothes on obvs) if we ever get to that is going to be put off and leave me.

Yes they do girls like muscular big guys like me and that's a fact

Reply 9

londonmyst

19

It depends on the specific girl and often how unsightly the large surgery scars appear.
Her attraction dealbreakers, beauty standards and lifestyle preferences.
Some girls will be able to see beyond the most visible and unsightly of scars without losing any sexual attraction.
Others will be very put off or panicked and may well back away as fast as they can then ghost or block.

I'm a 28 year old female with a collection of very unsightly scars and injuries, mostly sustained in childhood attacks by violent adults.
I cover the damage with layers of heavy makeup and don't allow anyone to see me without makeup on.
Never leave home without makeup and high heels on.
No guy that I've dated or friend I made since the age of 16 has seen me without makeup. None ever will.

how do large surgery scars affect attraction?

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