Relationship at work

Believe2014

I am really into this girl at work. We work together daily once i moved into the new office and she keeps giving me these signals that she likes me, the way we laugh, joke, hit each other etc... Theres always deep eye contact and she always makes excuses to come to my desk! Everytime me and her are together people have notices saying why dont u 2 go out on a date. I finally built up the courage to ask her out in which her reply was a no! Close work mates have told me she plays people about and ahe messes with peoples mind, but now i have fallen for her... She then told me she knew i liked her as someone said something to her once i joined. Any suggestions to this?

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Reply 1

Orthonym

Well, she sounds like a flirt, and she said no, so you can't really make her say yes. You need to get over her. You have the wrong idea of her because your brain convinced you that she likes you. But she is the kind of person who flirts and things when she has no romantic feelings for the person she is flirting with. She probably flirts with a lot of other people in her life and it all means very little to her. You don't seem to be very compatible with her I think.

Reply 2

sophieta

Well she said no so you need to deal with it and move on.

Reply 3

Believe2014

OP

2

Orthonym- thank you for your reply. Much appreciated. You may be correct. I have just got back from holiday, went to work... And she was excited to see me, she made sure she was on the same lunch hour as me and thereafter kept flirting which i thought nothing of! One work colleague said you seriously need to go on a date when both of us were there... (Alot of work colleagues have said this when me and her are together) But the way she was looking at me, when she thought i was not looking makes me think otherwise. Ok, she said no... I get that... But how can i stop what im feeling for her when she keeps flirting, and making these eye contacts aswel as making sure she spends her lunch hour with me... It's quite difficult!

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Reply 4

Lotus_Eater

7

Original post by Believe2014

Theres always deep eye contact and she always makes excuses to come to my desk!

Probably the saddest use of an exclamation mark I've ever seen.

She sounds like a bit of a flirt. You did the right thing and asked her out. She said 'no'. Either she genuinely doesn't want to date you or she's into playing games. Whichever one it is, you should just move on and just conduct yourself professionally henceforth.

Reply 5

Orthonym

Original post by Believe2014

Orthonym- thank you for your reply. Much appreciated. You may be correct. I have just got back from holiday, went to work... And she was excited to see me, she made sure she was on the same lunch hour as me and thereafter kept flirting which i thought nothing of! One work colleague said you seriously need to go on a date when both of us were there... (Alot of work colleagues have said this when me and her are together) But the way she was looking at me, when she thought i was not looking makes me think otherwise. Ok, she said no... I get that... But how can i stop what im feeling for her when she keeps flirting, and making these eye contacts aswel as making sure she spends her lunch hour with me... It's quite difficult!

Posted from TSR Mobile

I think you should think of the flirting as a bad thing. She knows you like her, she knows that every time she flirts with you it is hurting you because you're dealing with rejection and trying to stop liking her. But she still does it. If I were in your situation my feelings would die down because she is not being very caring, which is a turn off for me.
If you're struggling with your feelings though, you can try avoiding her, but you have to see her around so it might not work. If you really feel you have to do something to stop it, then be really honest with her and say that you enjoy hanging out with her but it's really bittersweet because it makes you like her. I don't think you will stop liking her if she just stops flirting, I think you'll need to generally speak to her less, so it means asking her to back off a bit. That's really the only active thing you can do to get over her faster because there is no magic way of getting over people.

Reply 6

Believe2014

OP

2

Orthonym- thank you for your reply again. I agree with you, and i wish i was like you in terms of it puts you off and she is not considering my feelings. For examw today she had a bad day so i emailed her back saying whats up she told me half the stuff, the other she said i need to see you in person... So i went to see her and she had the biggest smile on her face then she told me what was wrong which is very miner.. The point is, your right, she should not be taking advantage of what i feel for her.. The funny thing is, my last relastionahip ended me becomming ill, and 2 years on, the girl i love is not worth it!

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Relationship at work

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