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Had a threesome and now fancy one of the guys
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Original post by theDanIdentity
lool, i'm joking. back to the Op, your chances are Extremely low (close to impossible). guys don't really like the image of another guy hitting/banging his girlfriend. it will be etched in their minds like that disturbing horror movie you watched when you were a kid. the movie that put you off the cinema for years and years to come. In this situation, it Will be worse than the movie. Because in the movie, you got to leave the cinema. He won't have that chance. (And we're not even considering the fact that his 'banging buddy' will have bragging rights and if they're close, will Never make him forget it.. to a point that a look from the 'banging buddy', will set off your boyfriends' imagination. So in essence, bragging rights and or awkward looks when all three of you are together in public. Not Good.)
True if they did go out it would be a horror always in the back of his mind whether he shows it or not. The only exception is if he happens to have cuckold tendencies and rather enjoys the thought of his girl getting pounded by other men, in which case he will wh*re her out. Either way not a healthy relationship.
Original post by theDanIdentity
N.B: i never said that you didn't have a chance btw; you might get him to fall for you. i'm just saying, your odds of a relationship right off the bat, are more like 1.5/10 of success/succeeding.
You'd have higher odds in turning him into your fwb First, and then seeing if you can transcend that invisible barrier and progress right into a relationship. Good luck.
N.B: i never said that you didn't have a chance btw; you might get him to fall for you. i'm just saying, your odds of a relationship right off the bat, are more like 1.5/10 of success/succeeding.
You'd have higher odds in turning him into your fwb First, and then seeing if you can transcend that invisible barrier and progress right into a relationship. Good luck.
It's going to be way too painful for OP to make him an FWB to try and convert into a relationship. OP will get attached to someone who is extremely unlikely to make any kind of emotional attachment let alone investment in her.
OP just needs to wash her hands of this. I do wonder though what made her fall for one guy over the other, considering she didn't really know either
Slut-shaming + Homophobia + Trolls + Idiots = Recipe for a GREAT thread... 
Original post by Menakshelatte
you are such a slut.
Nothing like sisterly support.
Original post by Anonymous
Anyway. My main question is to guys. Would a random threesome put you off having a relationship with the girl involved? Please be honest, I can handle the truth. Thank you.
It'd make you more attractive to some of us.
Original post by gagafacea1
Slut-shaming + Homophobia + Trolls + Idiots = Recipe for a GREAT thread...
Quite.
Original post by Anonymous
Hi,
So not a particularly common scenario but am just hoping for a bit of advice. A couple of months ago I had a threesome. I'm a girl in my first year at uni and my threesome was with two guys. It happened after we got back to halls after a night out. I knew both of the guys a bit but not that well. Anyway, I don't know whether this is just a passing phase, but now I feel as though I fancy one of the guys. I want to go out with him.
I have spoken to one of my best guy friends about this and he says that there is absolutely no chance that this guy will fancy me now that this threesome has happened. One of his reasons is because a threesome makes me seem as though I'm not girlfriend material and another was that he will now forever have the image of me having sex with this other guy in his head.
Anyway. My main question is to guys. Would a random threesome put you off having a relationship with the girl involved? Please be honest, I can handle the truth. Thank you.
So not a particularly common scenario but am just hoping for a bit of advice. A couple of months ago I had a threesome. I'm a girl in my first year at uni and my threesome was with two guys. It happened after we got back to halls after a night out. I knew both of the guys a bit but not that well. Anyway, I don't know whether this is just a passing phase, but now I feel as though I fancy one of the guys. I want to go out with him.
I have spoken to one of my best guy friends about this and he says that there is absolutely no chance that this guy will fancy me now that this threesome has happened. One of his reasons is because a threesome makes me seem as though I'm not girlfriend material and another was that he will now forever have the image of me having sex with this other guy in his head.
Anyway. My main question is to guys. Would a random threesome put you off having a relationship with the girl involved? Please be honest, I can handle the truth. Thank you.
Hi anonymous,
Let me post a question to you first.
Would you mind your having sex with your boyfriend with another lady or together with you?
Personally i think for most of the guys, they would mind. But it all depends on individual. So its best to talk to him about it, maybe go for a date or 2, without having sex.
Original post by jazjaz
OP said she wanted the truth. At the end of the day the OP has to live with this and take accountability. Let's not sugar coat this being with two dudes at the same time is a major red flag when it comes to starting a committed relationship, perhaps a plus for starting a fling or FWB though.
The term 'slut' is used to merely shame women who make liberal choices about sex, and actually enjoy themselves.
Why is judging and shaming a woman because of sex the 'truth'?
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Astagafirullah.
Astagafirullah.
Original post by Menakshelatte
you are such a slut.
Don't be jealous girl... You'll get your two c***s one day.
Nobody's saying it's necessarily bad to be a "slut". But is it an appropriate word? The dictionary says:
slut
noun
1.
a woman who has many casual sexual partners.
So in this situation having two sexual partners at the same time is almost the very definition of the word. The same would apply to a man in this situation. Maybe it has negative overtones since it also used to be used for women who are uncleanly.
If I had a threesome (with two women obviously) people could call me a slut as much as they wanted and I would be like... yes. yes I am.
: High Five!
P.S. I'd still like to know what you'd been taking on your night out. I find it hard to believe that this would happen if you'd just had a couple of pints of beer.
slut
noun
1.
a woman who has many casual sexual partners.
So in this situation having two sexual partners at the same time is almost the very definition of the word. The same would apply to a man in this situation. Maybe it has negative overtones since it also used to be used for women who are uncleanly.
If I had a threesome (with two women obviously) people could call me a slut as much as they wanted and I would be like... yes. yes I am.
: High Five!P.S. I'd still like to know what you'd been taking on your night out. I find it hard to believe that this would happen if you'd just had a couple of pints of beer.
(edited 8 years ago)
OP can I ask you - if this threesome had occurred with you, the guy you like, and another girl, would you be ok with being with him or would you always see him having sex with that girl? Especially if you knew the girl, and you would always know your first time with him you both had him and know exactly what that looks like? Could you live with that?
I don't think you did anything wrong but sadly it's not a great way to start off a meaningful relationship so I think unless you're in love you might be best washing your hands of this one.
I don't think you did anything wrong but sadly it's not a great way to start off a meaningful relationship so I think unless you're in love you might be best washing your hands of this one.
Original post by karl pilkington
Did they both take it turns to do you? Also if you agree not to cheat on him etc then maybe he might still agree to go out with you.
Yeah they did. I definitely wouldn't cheat on him if we were going out! I guess it's just whether he can trust me after seeing me have a threesome.
Original post by AvaAdore
OP can I ask you - if this threesome had occurred with you, the guy you like, and another girl, would you be ok with being with him or would you always see him having sex with that girl? Especially if you knew the girl, and you would always know your first time with him you both had him and know exactly what that looks like? Could you live with that?
I don't think you did anything wrong but sadly it's not a great way to start off a meaningful relationship so I think unless you're in love you might be best washing your hands of this one.
I don't think you did anything wrong but sadly it's not a great way to start off a meaningful relationship so I think unless you're in love you might be best washing your hands of this one.
I think you make a good point and one that I hadn't really considered before. I think I probably could live with that image, but I would have to really, really like the guy to overcome it.
Original post by jazjaz
OP said she wanted the truth. At the end of the day the OP has to live with this and take accountability. Let's not sugar coat this being with two dudes at the same time is a major red flag when it comes to starting a committed relationship, perhaps a plus for starting a fling or FWB though.
Why would it be a 'red flag' for starting a committed relationship? I am single at the moment, and so I'm not hurting anyone by having a threesome. If I were to be in a relationship I would be very committed and true to that person. I certainly wouldn't cheat and I don't see why having a threesome would mean that I am more likely to cheat and be disloyal in a future relationship.
Original post by noobynoo
Nobody's saying it's necessarily bad to be a "slut". But is it an appropriate word? The dictionary says:
slut
noun
1.
a woman who has many casual sexual partners.
So in this situation having two sexual partners at the same time is almost the very definition of the word. The same would apply to a man in this situation. Maybe it has negative overtones since it also used to be used for women who are uncleanly.
If I had a threesome (with two women obviously) people could call me a slut as much as they wanted and I would be like... yes. yes I am.: High Five!
P.S. I'd still like to know what you'd been taking on your night out. I find it hard to believe that this would happen if you'd just had a couple of pints of beer.
slut
noun
1.
a woman who has many casual sexual partners.
So in this situation having two sexual partners at the same time is almost the very definition of the word. The same would apply to a man in this situation. Maybe it has negative overtones since it also used to be used for women who are uncleanly.
If I had a threesome (with two women obviously) people could call me a slut as much as they wanted and I would be like... yes. yes I am.
: High Five!P.S. I'd still like to know what you'd been taking on your night out. I find it hard to believe that this would happen if you'd just had a couple of pints of beer.
We hadn't been taking anything. We were all really drunk though.
Original post by noobynoo
Why would any guy have a threesome with another guy?
Are they gay?
Did any gayness happen?
Was there crossing swords?
How did this happen. Where you all high on ketamine or something?
Are they gay?
Did any gayness happen?
Was there crossing swords?
How did this happen. Where you all high on ketamine or something?
We weren't high. No gayness happened. I think they were both really h**ny and i guess they just felt that sharing one v****a is better than having no v****a at all.
OP, if you want to, ask him.
As much as people might drone on, there's no definitely. Nobody can say he definitely won't do x or definitely will do y.
And ignore everyone else. Not your fault they lead vanilla lives and think anybody who likes different stuff is bad and wrong. Just remember, those that protest the loudest often have the most to hide.
As much as people might drone on, there's no definitely. Nobody can say he definitely won't do x or definitely will do y.
And ignore everyone else. Not your fault they lead vanilla lives and think anybody who likes different stuff is bad and wrong. Just remember, those that protest the loudest often have the most to hide.
Well I wouldn't have a threesome with another guy in the first place 
I've turned down opportunities to do so before, and will without hesitation do so again in future. Nothing against those who partake in it, but it just doesn't float my boat.
If hypothetically I did have one, and the girl wanted to go out with me I'm not going to lie I'd be cautious. That isn't to say I wouldn't go on a date with her, and perhaps casually date her, but the experience would be a massive mental barrier for me in regards to forming a serious relationship with her. That said love is strange, and if I liked her enough I wouldn't rule anything out. Although that is just me, I'm sure a lot of guys wouldn't hold it against in forming a relationship. Likewise a lot would. It depends on the person. And the only way to find out in regards to this person is to give it a chance.
Talk to him, ask him on a date, see how it goes. You have nothing to lose really.
I've turned down opportunities to do so before, and will without hesitation do so again in future. Nothing against those who partake in it, but it just doesn't float my boat. If hypothetically I did have one, and the girl wanted to go out with me I'm not going to lie I'd be cautious. That isn't to say I wouldn't go on a date with her, and perhaps casually date her, but the experience would be a massive mental barrier for me in regards to forming a serious relationship with her. That said love is strange, and if I liked her enough I wouldn't rule anything out. Although that is just me, I'm sure a lot of guys wouldn't hold it against in forming a relationship. Likewise a lot would. It depends on the person. And the only way to find out in regards to this person is to give it a chance.
Talk to him, ask him on a date, see how it goes. You have nothing to lose really.
Original post by Anonymous
We hadn't been taking anything. We were all really drunk though.
Yeah. That's what you think! Well. No, that's an outrageous accusation! And I immediately retract it. Bad me. How drunk is "really drunk"? Would either of them even remember what you looked like or what your name is?
I like how everyone pretends this was everyone's own grown up responsible choice to decide to have a threesome. And that we should respect your decision for being a liberal minded woman of the 21st century. When in reality it was three people totally off their faces. Hardly even aware of what they were doing.
Here's a question. Why would you even want to have a relationship with a guy who thinks having a threesome with another guy is a fun thing to do?
(edited 8 years ago)
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