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Confused about my relationship having to lie constantly to my parents

My boyfriend and I are crazy in love. He is not the perfect guy that parents would wish for their kids since he is kind of lazy and not very ambitious but I'm very in love with him and we're so happy together. We've been together for three years, and we're still very much in love, we care a lot for each other.
However, the thing is sometimes I feel pressured and very fustrated because my parents have developed an irrational hatred towards him, and they wanted to kick me out from home if I didn't break up with him therefore I lied and I'm still lying to them about my relationship. They're often inspecting and asking people to make sure we're not together. We're also from two different backgrounds ethnically, religiously, his Muslim and I'm supposedly "Christian" and financially too. He is in fact an atheist but they don't care about that. In fact I am the one who handles our economic situation.
The point is, I have to constantly lie to them in order to be with him, I love my parents very dearly but i don't agree with their opinion on him however it affects me and I feel morally wrong when I lie about it. I tried to change their mind but it's impossible, their hatred is too strong. Aside this they're very nice parents that have done a lot for me. They want my best interest overall but if they find out I'm with him they will kick me out from home. So I lie. We decided to move out together to another city to be away for a while. However the guilt is eating me.
We decided to take a break in order to calm things down but one week and we couldn't be away from each other. Talking to my parents is not a choice, because they're really stubborn about it. So now we're basically keeping the relationship secretive.
Any advice anyone ...? :frown:
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
My boyfriend and I are crazy in love. He is not the perfect guy that parents would wish for their kids since he is kind of lazy and not very ambitious but I'm very in love with him and we're so happy together. We've been together for three years, and we're still very much in love, we care a lot for each other.
However, the thing is sometimes I feel pressured and very fustrated because my parents have developed an irrational hatred towards him, and they wanted to kick me out from home if I didn't break up with him therefore I lied and I'm still lying to them about my relationship. They're often inspecting and asking people to make sure we're not together. We're also from two different backgrounds ethnically, religiously, his Muslim and I'm supposedly "Christian" and financially too. He is in fact an atheist but they don't care about that. In fact I am the one who handles our economic situation.
The point is, I have to constantly lie to them in order to be with him, I love my parents very dearly but i don't agree with their opinion on him however it affects me and I feel morally wrong when I lie about it. I tried to change their mind but it's impossible, their hatred is too strong. Aside this they're very nice parents that have done a lot for me. They want my best interest overall but if they find out I'm with him they will kick me out from home. So I lie. We decided to move out together to another city to be away for a while. However the guilt is eating me.
We decided to take a break in order to calm things down but one week and we couldn't be away from each other. Talking to my parents is not a choice, because they're really stubborn about it. So now we're basically keeping the relationship secretive.
Any advice anyone ...? :frown:


It is a tricky one. I think that a lot of it depends on how old you are and how dependent you are on your parents financially. If you think that this guy is someone that you have a long term future with then I would be looking to tell your parents. Have they spent any time with him at all?

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