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Think my boyfriend's family hate me

This is a long one hold on.
It started off fine. This is my first proper relationship and I was really nervous about meeting his parents because I'm really shy and my mind goes blank meeting new people. It was fine when I first met them and for the first 5 months of our relationship. We'd chat if I saw them and we even went out to a bands day, just me, my mum, his mum and my boyfriend. I've been at uni for the last 3 months and seen my boyfriend about once a month while I've been away so our relationship is still good but I hadn't seen his family in all that time obviously. Last week I spent the day with my boyfriend and was supposed to be staying over at his house, which is something I've done lots before with no issues. His mum ignored me the entire time I was there, walking straight past both me and my boyfriend even as we were stood outside their house together and he said hello and I smiled as I was taking things out of his car. When his dad got home we spoke and he asked how uni was going and I was telling him things I'd been learning as he did a similar course to the one I'm doing now. We didn't see them again all evening until about 9pm when my boyfriend went to see why they weren't coming into the front room, which is where we'd been sat watching soaps all evening. My boyfriend told me to go and sit in his bedroom which is next door to his front room and his family immediately went into the room as I left and started talking about how I'd made them feel uncomfortable and was 'sprawled across the sofa' which I wasn't as I was sat right next to the arm on a 4 seater, with my boyfriend still on the same half of the sofa as me. I could hear them all talking about me and how I'd made them feel unwelcome in their own home (mainly his mum speaking) so I asked my boyfriend to take me home instead of staying the night.
This obviously really upset me because I can't stand making anyone upset. I only have my mum and I told her what had happened and she was upset about the situation also. My boyfriend texted me later on saying that it was because I hadn't spoken to anyone (despite speaking to his dad and playing games with his brothers) and then later changed this to it was because HE hadn't spoken to anyone. These were excuses given by his mam as he texted me. She still hasn't apologised to me despite having my phone number and apparently feeling awful about it and very sorry according to my bf and I really don't want to go back there.
My boyfriend doesn't seem to understand why me and my mum are still upset by this and seems annoyed that I told her as it makes it difficult for me to go back over there. As we were discussing this, he accidentally let slip that his mum thought my mum was weird and possessive over me and basically that she was a better mum than mine as she's more flexible and relaxed. His mum always gives off this superiority thing that makes me nervous and unnerved anyway and he does everything she asks (well, tells) him to do. My mum and I were actually abused for basically my entire life, so my mum is a bit possessive, but mainly because she knows I have a really hard time saying no even when I really need/want to but I don't know how I'm supposed to get his family to understand without going into details. She also called me the name of his ex many times, and told people in front of me that she wishes she could do the holiday they did together again because it was such a good time.
My boyfriend is amazing and so understanding but I feel like his mum really dislikes me and my mum and just thinks her and my bf are better than both of us. I can't get over the fact that they were talking about my mum like that without even considering the reasons for it, and I don't know how to tell my boyfriend all of this when he thinks the world of his mum.

Reply 1

masrihartono

Well, l'm sorry.
Be patient!

Reply 2

masrihartono

Maybe, your bf hiding something from you, its can be dangerous if he tell that to you

Reply 3

Jono00904

Don't worry my family disowned me for marrying into a Protestant family I was in a deeply Catholic family I have been married 16 years now so yes it's gonna hurt but there loss those that matter don't care them that care don't matter

Reply 4

queenofthe.night

no I was just sat watching TV with my boyfriend and his brothers. All of us spoke to his dad when he came home and we didn't even see his mum again until all this happened. I'm just really confused because according to my bf he's the one they had a problem with and that everything has been resolved but I still don't feel comfortable