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Cavy's Career Crawl

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Really glad that boss showed you the new area you'll be working in, so that you have a sense of the faces and layout/set-up, if not some names too!

You can do this, we're all rooting for you! :rave:
Sorry I haven't posted on here in ages :s-smilie: Been doing terrible at blogs this year :getmecoat:
Wishing you all the best for tomorrow, you've got this :jumphug: So proud of you :cube:
You are going to smash it :youbetcha:

:goodluck:
(edited 3 years ago)
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Sending all best wishes for this week - we know you'll be great

:grouphugs:
27/04/21
I'll talk through everything in due course - by all accounts it's been a great few days but im just struggling a bit tonight with feeling overwhelmed and have wanted to cry all afternoon.
Stuff was going well up until we had a teams call all together, it was a really relaxed just design discussion and the point of me being there was to get me used to it and introduce me to the rest of the team that were working from home.
I just couldnt do it i dont know what happened, anyone who knows me from my TSR meets knows what i mean when i say i kind of freeze *cough* the door situations *cough* and that is what happened.
I couldnt breathe properly and was just really overwhelmed by it all, i have never turned my camera on when we have TSR zoom calls and rarely use my mic either. I almost always use the type box because im self conscious of my appearance and my voice too. I was worried that they would laugh at me.
Bless my new manager she could see i was not really alright and just said i was having technical difficulties.
I felt like i had let her down and felt annoyed at myself for being tripped up by something so simple, it was just a lot of people all at once and the fact they all knew each other and i was coming into their group didnt help matters. It was like the first TSR meet i ever went to where everyone was already friends. When i had a training voice call earlier in the morning it was fine as a) there was no cameras and b) it was 1-1 with some person im probably not going to speak to again.
I feel stupid for even agreeing to it, i wanted to show i was willing to do anything asked of me and wanted to get stuck in straight away. Plus the topic of the meeting was actually interesting not that i took much of it in as i was trying to breathe properly.
She spoke to me afterwards which was mainly me apologising for not saying anything on the call, she was really understanding which i hadnt expected going into the week. Not because she came across as mean in the interview but because it's an office now and in my head that is a lot more serious and clinical than the factory floor.
She said not to worry and that it will get easier with practice, she also said i can meet people on the team 1-1 over calls and just have a more relaxed chat which would make me feel more at ease. She said she knows i will be fine because ive built up that confidence with people from the factory floor and even in the interview i was more confident after like 10 minutes.
Once i get to know people im fine its just that initial first bit, get me talking about rodent's and i'll be anyone's new best friend lol.

The two days as a whole have been good though, i enjoyed it a lot even if trying to take in all the new information was a bit intense. Im really glad i know so much from the factory floor because it's made it so much easier. Its kind of good timing because something im checking on the factory floor atm is an earlier version of what i will be working on with the design team so i already have some hands on knowledge of it.
I feel very swag because i now have my own email, teams account, laptop, headphones etc. I feel like ive finally made it in life now :lol:
I mean to be fair to myself ive only been working 8 months of my life and im only 22 which is still quite young to have risen to the position im in now so i think i can deal with the fact im not the most natural at microsoft teams. There are worse weaknesses to have.
Plus in terms of confidence if we have it at a very high level now on the factory floor its only slightly dipped by moving to a new area with new people. I'm not starting from 0 like i was in September, like in terms of how i come across and self belief im at the position 2 days in that i was a few months in when i first started.

For the two days i've mostly been catching up on the kind of stuff i will need to know for this current project. I'm coming in as they've already started it so im just familiarising myself with as much as possible. Thats stuff like watching the tests they carried out on video and reading all the manuals, process documents etc. Having a lot of military interest and knowledge is a good thing to have, i just need to revise the different kinds of planes and stuff like that ive not researched before.

Obviously i cant and wouldnt discuss any details of whatever i am working on, its all very exciting though and it feels cool to be at the cutting edge of things. Even the tests that are done are really amazing and when covid restrictions have gone hopefully we will get to go out to all these cool places again.

I would be diligent and excited about any design work i am doing but the fact its for life saving equipment just adds that extra dimension of importance to it. I dont think it especially matters that i cant divulge any details about the stuff, this blog isnt really about the day to day 'i did this', more just a documentation of my emotions and progressions to the pinnacle of my career wherever i feel that target lies.

At first i was a bit frustrated at doing the staggered days mainly just because i felt impulsive and wanted to start as soon as possible but in retrospect i think its good because im really tired emotionally so its good to have a few days back where i am more settled until next week.
I also found it out its another bank holiday which is like just brilliant because ive not been sleeping well recently so hopefully i can catch up.
I dont think it helps that i lost my whole box of promethazine when i was laying the carpet in my room. So im dreaming now again, weird things like carrying around my own dissected heart in a glass jar o_o

Tomorrow there is a meeting with a supplier so i need to ask my old manager if i can take an hour out, i have my laptop with me i just need to find out the wifi code because i was using an ethernet cable in the office. Either that or i just go back to the office for the hour. Will see what happens. My challenge is to say good morning on the teams so lets get that done :redface:

My new manager said i should be really proud of myself for the past two days and that everything shes told me to do ive just picked up really well and flown through things like the reading drawings exercise (reading technical drawings is my forte :colondollar:)
(edited 3 years ago)
You should be proud of yourself for giving the teams meeting a go :hugs:

Starting a new role is scary and every time I've moved roles I've felt like a NQT again.

No-one expects you to say exactly what you are doing Cavy but you are doing so amazingly well.

Be kind to yourself :grouphugs:
You'll get into it pretty quick! By the end of that same meet I couldn't get you to leave as you were too busy talking to people. Give it a couple of weeks and you'll be stuck right in :smile:
Well done Cavy! It takes courage to step outside of your comfort zone, don't forget that.
Sounds like you've got a good encouraging manager who's got your back - am pleased! Don't fret too much thinking about the Teams meeting: it's always daunting being thrown into a group of new people.

Keep going! :rave:
Hope the week is going well :hugs:
Hope it’s still going well cavy.
X
10/05/21
Hello everyone, we have now progressed to actually speaking on microsoft teams :king1:
Last week i did two days in design, was meant to be 3 but the bank holiday :bath: I had a good two days though, the thing that got me speaking in the first place was our group teams meet when someone said they needed something drawing
I was super nervous but i was also internally like 'who said drawing??! 👀' so in the end my compulsion to volunteer to do the drawing won out :lol:
I also added some useful knowledge about 3D softwares, sometimes i feel a bit insecure about coming from a product design background rather than garment but i think its good in a way because i can bring a new perspective and know about softwares the others dont necessarily know about.
Last week i also helped one of the other girls with their cutting for their project, i have discovered im not brilliant at cutting fabric but i guess some things come with practice :colondollar: Im good at cutting paper so its kind of like stretchy paper i guess lol
I got to meet one of the other girls too and i really warmed to her tbh, she only graduated a year before me which makes me feel less like a foetus :blushing: and shes quite extroverted but not in an obnoxious way so it was good really cos she got me talking and we couldnt shut each other up in the end lol
The other girl ive been helping but i still feel a little intimidated by her just cos shes older and i feel she knows what shes doing more :colondollar: i am learning a lot from her though cos she did a textiles based degree so she knows all about fabric grains and which way to cut and stuff. I think its quite cool you have to mark up and cut your own patterns for your prototypes.
Then there is one more girl who is working from home atm so i havent met her face to face but she was helping me with my work today over the teams chat and she seems nice, plus she likes animals so that's always a good thing :colone:
There's a few other people and obvioisly the lead designers over us one of whom is my manager but those are the main people ive been interacting with. I'm fully in design now too which is exciting :yep: my last day in my old role was last friday

Its a different environment really in terms of people, what i mean is the people in the factory are a lot older and ive never found people like that especially intimidating because i dont really relate to them as much whereas when people are younger and female i look up to them more and i kind of feel inferior especially around my weight which i know is stupid since that has 0 bearing on my work. I feel like perhaps there is a young woman office sterotype of how to look like and i dont really fit into that. Wearing feminine clothes would make me feel uncomfortable, i've got two very conspicuous scars on my forearm and then im heavier than most of them. Im kind of worried about that last point from a testing point of view, you have to test the clothes sometimes and they record your weight and chest measurement and the thought of that just makes me want to shrivel up on the floor. Im not even sure they could find any military suit that even would fit me since i have quite awkward proportions even excluding weight. Idk hopefully i wont have to think about that for a while, fairly sure stuff like that is voluntary anyway so.

I'm sure i will lose my scruples anyway, when you are working with people 8 hours a day you tend to get to know one another and everyones quirks quickly. I mean i literally vomited in front of everyone on the factory floor in december so does it really get much more embarrassing than that :lol: as long as that doesnt happen again i think ill be good.
I am who i am, its about my brains not about anything else so as long as i remember that and realise other people arent probably thinking about this as much as i am then ill be good :smile:

This week im working on some quite heavy documents so i hope i do them right, ive seen them before on the factory floor but its a bit different making them yourself. Everyone's help is only a teams message/call away anyway so i dont feel too bad about it. Plus tomorrow is going to be great because I GET TO WORK FROM HOME :nutcase:

I'm so excited about this :lol: i havent been able to work from home once during this entire pandemic starting from september, it will be nice not to have to spend 2 hours a day commuting on the buses. It's only for one day but hopefully even after the pandemic there will be greater flexibility around coming into the office, i dont see why not really since you can do the same work from home its just a lot less sweaty and noisy than going to work in person :colondollar:
I have a meeting with my manager tomorrow morning and she said i can SHOW MY HAMSTERS i think this is a great idea to get me used to video calling because when im with them i dont stress about anything and im excited to show her them. Its first thing in the morning at 8am so they will still be awake then. The entire meet isnt about hamsters but its a good intro :colondollar:
Im going to be that zoom hamster meme personified :biggrin:

(edited 2 years ago)
Well done for volunteering to do the drawing :party:

This really sounds so positive :smile:

I've often found that people who seem aloof are not very confident - I've been secretly helping someone else on SLT learn EXCEL as they were pretending to know ....

Hope your hamsters are awake and what a great way to practise using Teams :hugs:

Really proud of how well you are doing ... i never doubted you
Woop woop :hugs: sounds like this role is much more suited to you :biggrin: have fun tomorrow :awesome:
Glad to know you feel a bit more confident on Teams now :smile: Enjoy working from home!
13/05/21
Ngl am feeling quite down, i was quite lonely today as everyone i have spoken to most were working from home so in my department there was just me and a couple others. One i am in a team with to do this little mini project which was fine i have been talking to him and stuff and i think we have done a good presentation. I did all the drawings and he did all the technical annotations but aside from that i didnt really speak to anyone.
Im quite intimidated by these two people as they seem to really know what they are doing and i tried to talk to one of them yesterday but it didnt really go anywhere.
I feel like they dont really like me, i know logically they probably have 0 opinion of me but im just getting that vibe. One of them is older and i feel like they probably think im some silly little child who doesnt know anything, but i want to learn.
I'm just finding it a bit hard to fit in i guess, even today there was some joke about parking which just went over my head since i cant drive. Then someone else is pregnant and it feels like that gets brought up rather regularly. I'm not going to go into a long post about infertility but i feel a bit less than compared to other people even though i've never had a maternal instinct for sproglets of my own.
I guess im just missing my friends from the factory floor, there were some annoying/moody people there but if you take them out of the equation i was quite almost popular i guess with everyone else. I got to the point where i knew pretty much everyone and most people would smile and wave at me. I suppose its just getting to that point again but i dont know if that will happen. I probably put everyone off by being awkward and shy.
Part of me worries i wont be good at the job as well because i feel like im forgetting things and having to re-ask for help but its like information overload at the moment. I'm trying to take notes where i can and pin the file paths to the start and things like that but even so its a lot to take on board.
The actual job is much better than being an inspector but i just worry about the social side. In some ways i feel like ive lived about 50 lives in 22 years because so much has happened but in otherways i feel really young for my age and behind everyone else.
Cavy :console:

You are still very new to these people and it takes time to build up working relationships with people, especially at the moment.

I'm sure you are doing fine and everyone is just anxious with COVID etc.

Be kind to yourself ... you are doing brilliantly :hugs:
Original post by CoolCavy
13/05/21
Ngl am feeling quite down, i was quite lonely today as everyone i have spoken to most were working from home so in my department there was just me and a couple others. One i am in a team with to do this little mini project which was fine i have been talking to him and stuff and i think we have done a good presentation. I did all the drawings and he did all the technical annotations but aside from that i didnt really speak to anyone.
Im quite intimidated by these two people as they seem to really know what they are doing and i tried to talk to one of them yesterday but it didnt really go anywhere.
I feel like they dont really like me, i know logically they probably have 0 opinion of me but im just getting that vibe. One of them is older and i feel like they probably think im some silly little child who doesnt know anything, but i want to learn.
I'm just finding it a bit hard to fit in i guess, even today there was some joke about parking which just went over my head since i cant drive. Then someone else is pregnant and it feels like that gets brought up rather regularly. I'm not going to go into a long post about infertility but i feel a bit less than compared to other people even though i've never had a maternal instinct for sproglets of my own.
I guess im just missing my friends from the factory floor, there were some annoying/moody people there but if you take them out of the equation i was quite almost popular i guess with everyone else. I got to the point where i knew pretty much everyone and most people would smile and wave at me. I suppose its just getting to that point again but i dont know if that will happen. I probably put everyone off by being awkward and shy.
Part of me worries i wont be good at the job as well because i feel like im forgetting things and having to re-ask for help but its like information overload at the moment. I'm trying to take notes where i can and pin the file paths to the start and things like that but even so its a lot to take on board.
The actual job is much better than being an inspector but i just worry about the social side. In some ways i feel like ive lived about 50 lives in 22 years because so much has happened but in otherways i feel really young for my age and behind everyone else.

I think what I'd say here is that it takes time to build a rapport with people. You've not been in your new role very long so it's understandable that you haven't got as close to your new colleagues as you were with the ones you had spent a lot of time with.

Also, don't worry about having to ask about things a lot. I'm sure your colleagues understand that there's a lot for you to take onboard and you can't be expected to remember everything all the time :smile:
15/05/21
Thank you everyone :grouphugs: appreciate all your support :hugs:
Friday was okay, there was hardly anyone in tbh lol, my manager is off on holiday next week so we will see what happens there :hide:
We had a short meeting with the general boss CEO (?) person about the move to the new site and yeh he basically confirmed what i thought already, the buses would be put on when there is demand for it i.e most likely when the factory floor moves as most of them cant drive. Most people in the office can but ive already had offers of lifts as i live between most people's houses and the new location. Plus if worst came to worst they would just have to let me work from home until they got put on. Speaking of that i am doing that next wednesday as i have some all day virtual training so my manager asked me if i would sooner do it from home.
I think i might learn to drive, its becoming a more irritating obstacle and although i am worried about putting on weight i wouldnt be one of those people who used their car to drive 5 minutes down the road. I would still walk places. We will see what happens, my provisional doesnt expire until march next year so i have some time.

Towards midday on friday i got a phone call from the doctors saying did i want my covid vaccine, i was a bit taken aback at this becasue i wasnt expecting to be called for it until next month at the earliest as they are still doing people in their 30s. The woman on the phone said they had some extra batches or something so would i want one.

I said sure even though i was a bit nervous am not going to lie, she said can you come tomorrow at 10:40 to which my internal feeling was less about the actual vaccine and more about 'eurgghgh i wanted to lie in :lol:'. Obviously i said yes because it sounded like a one off deal.
It was a little annoying though as the health centre is literally up the road from where i work (wasnt my GP as they dont do the vaccines there) but my parent had an appointment at the walk in place anyway for a different thing so i just paid for the taxi (couldnt be bothered getting the bus) and we both went.
They didnt go in with me as their appointment was later in the building next door so they went to the supermarket whilst i was getting stabbed :nurse:

I was a bit nervous going in as i didnt have any proof of my appointment since i got told by a phone call but they had me on the system so that was okay. I cant fault how efficiently it was run to be honest, was in and out really quickly apart from waiting 10 minutes after to check for side effects.
It did all feel a bit hunger games-esqe just because all the stewards and jabbers were wearing these grey sort of overalls so i felt like i was in district 12 :rofl:
It was positive to see so many younger people getting it, seems like the antivax youth on tsr are happily a minority.
TW SH

Spoiler


I did laugh when she asked me if i was pregnant though, felt like saying my ovaries packed up and left a long time ago :getmecoat:
Apparently im a bleeder, she had to use quite a few cotton balls. I suspect this is because sertraline has thinned by blood somewhat as i get nosebleeds quite a lot (not full on bleeds but like bloody snot ew ew TMI :hide: )
It really didnt hurt going in, i actually thought she hadnt put it in all the way cos it was that tiny of a prick. I guess they've just done so many.
My arm is hurting quite a lot now but im glad ive had it done, i was always prone to chest infections as a child and am always chesty when i get a cold. Although covid is meant to be a dry cough i didnt really want to chance it.
I'll feel better about getting public transport to work now as well.

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Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend :hugs:
How exciting that you got your first vaccine already!

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