I’m scared to go further with my boyfriend

Hi, thank you for the advice I talked to him it’s good. 😁

(edited 3 years ago)

Well I think u should initiate it and just see how it goes, he probably just doesn’t want to make u feel uncomfortable. I think u should just be bold about it tbh, when I met my bf he was a virgin so obviously I didn’t pressure him. But he would say some sexual things and then I would realise u know that he wanted to do stuff. Maybe just try saying something dirty or like just start kissing him and maybe just tease him a little too see how he acts. I don’t think u should be afraid because u have been together a year and sex is kinda important in a relationship obviously don’t do anything that u don’t want to. But maybe start slow as I’m doing foreplay for now or maybe u just do stuff to him or he does stuff to u. You’ve gone pretty slow tbh considering how long you’ve been together.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Well I think u should initiate it and just see how it goes, he probably just doesn’t want to make u feel uncomfortable. I think u should just be bold about it tbh, when I met my bf he was a virgin so obviously I didn’t pressure him. But he would say some sexual things and then I would realise u know that he wanted to do stuff. Maybe just try saying something dirty or like just start kissing him and maybe just tease him a little too see how he acts. I don’t think u should be afraid because u have been together a year and sex is kinda important in a relationship obviously don’t do anything that u don’t want to. But maybe start slow as I’m doing foreplay for now or maybe u just do stuff to him or he does stuff to u. You’ve gone pretty slow tbh considering how long you’ve been together.

I meant to say as in doing foreplay + u don’t have to do this but if he wants to do stuff soon and u don’t it could cause a break in relationship.

Reply 3

Foxehh

21

If you dont want to take things slower, you need to communicate that to him. He'll appreciate that you're telling him how you feel much more than if he were to find out he was making you uncomfortable this whole time.
I find post #1 to be ridiculous. Please take things at your own pace, there is nothing wrong with that :smile:

Reply 4

Bigirlbutilove

OP

3

Original post by Anonymous

Well I think u should initiate it and just see how it goes, he probably just doesn’t want to make u feel uncomfortable. I think u should just be bold about it tbh, when I met my bf he was a virgin so obviously I didn’t pressure him. But he would say some sexual things and then I would realise u know that he wanted to do stuff. Maybe just try saying something dirty or like just start kissing him and maybe just tease him a little too see how he acts. I don’t think u should be afraid because u have been together a year and sex is kinda important in a relationship obviously don’t do anything that u don’t want to. But maybe start slow as I’m doing foreplay for now or maybe u just do stuff to him or he does stuff to u. You’ve gone pretty slow tbh considering how long you’ve been together.

I didn’t mention this there’s a reason we’ve gone slow and that’s because of my past and because I randomly freak out during physical stuff. So some of the stuff you said to do would problem give me a panic attack. I know you said I don’t have to do this but all of what you said wasn’t really helpful. Thanks anyways

Reply 5

Surnia

20

I'm with @LovelyMrFox. Anon #1 is not at all helpful, including saying you're taking things slowly 'considering how long you've been together.' There is no timescale on these kind of things, it's when both parties feel totally comfortable and each should respect the other and take it at their pace.

Sit your boyfriend down and talk to him before you make out and emotions are running high. You'll both find it much easier to talk in that situation. It won't be all negative; tell him what you are happy to do and what is uncomfortable for you. A genuine person will accept your boundaries, for as long as it takes :console:

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

I personally think that u should talk to him about it because maybe he is uncertain whether u want to move forward or not because of your past. He seems really nice and genuine considering he’s not pressured u so I think that he should be okay with it. However, I do think that it will get to a point where he will want to do that so if u do leave it for too long it could potentially lead to him breaking up if that’s something he wants in the relationship. But again it’s all about timing so as long as you’re open about it and he’s not bothered, I wouldn’t worry.

I’m scared to go further with my boyfriend

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