Toxic cousins
Sit down everyone, grab a bag of popcorn, its a long one:
So, on my dads side of the family, he has 2 sisters (my aunties/phuppos). Lets call the younger one Y, and the older one Z. Aunty Y has 2 daughters (15 and 16) . Aunty Z has 4 kids (Daughters 22 and 30, sons 36 and idk the other one) but anyways, my whole life my aunty z and her kids lived in england, born and raised here, just like me. Aunt Z was like my second mum, i spent 1/2 if not more of my childhood there as my parents used to often work a lot. And aunty Y, she lived in pakistan for a bit but when her kids where age 4 and 5, they moved to england (2009).
Recently , (since last year), Aunty Z's daughters (her sons are nice), have become extremely *****y and toxic. The oldest daughter was getting married last year, and she did certain things like kicked us outta her room while keeping aunty y's cousins in her room. She would give us dirty looks, she would not talk to us. Point is, she treats me and my sis and my bro like ****ing ****, and she treats aunty y's daughters like princesses.
Some things i would like to address:
1) My mum told me that Aunty Z's kids were always rude and spoiled and like this in general so i shouldnt worry too much.
2) I am making this annonymous for a reason
3) Aunty y's daughters are also quite annoying and rude but not too much.
4) All of my life (well, the first 10-12 years anyways) i looked upto aunty z's kids, thinking they were awesome and perfect.
5) My dad and i are quite close, so he knows about the issue. He tried addressing it to his sister (aunty z) and then her oldest daughter started to become rlly nice to me and now shes just *****y again.
6) I know i said aunty z has 2 daughters, but the younger one itsnt that rude she just follows the older sister, she is the most *****iest.
7) To be fair, the older one has also changed a lot. She used to look so pretty, but now she dyed her hair blonde (it looks strange now)and she got lip fillers.
Thanks for listening, Rant over . (AMA btw x)
So, on my dads side of the family, he has 2 sisters (my aunties/phuppos). Lets call the younger one Y, and the older one Z. Aunty Y has 2 daughters (15 and 16) . Aunty Z has 4 kids (Daughters 22 and 30, sons 36 and idk the other one) but anyways, my whole life my aunty z and her kids lived in england, born and raised here, just like me. Aunt Z was like my second mum, i spent 1/2 if not more of my childhood there as my parents used to often work a lot. And aunty Y, she lived in pakistan for a bit but when her kids where age 4 and 5, they moved to england (2009).
Recently , (since last year), Aunty Z's daughters (her sons are nice), have become extremely *****y and toxic. The oldest daughter was getting married last year, and she did certain things like kicked us outta her room while keeping aunty y's cousins in her room. She would give us dirty looks, she would not talk to us. Point is, she treats me and my sis and my bro like ****ing ****, and she treats aunty y's daughters like princesses.
Some things i would like to address:
1) My mum told me that Aunty Z's kids were always rude and spoiled and like this in general so i shouldnt worry too much.
2) I am making this annonymous for a reason
3) Aunty y's daughters are also quite annoying and rude but not too much.
4) All of my life (well, the first 10-12 years anyways) i looked upto aunty z's kids, thinking they were awesome and perfect.
5) My dad and i are quite close, so he knows about the issue. He tried addressing it to his sister (aunty z) and then her oldest daughter started to become rlly nice to me and now shes just *****y again.
6) I know i said aunty z has 2 daughters, but the younger one itsnt that rude she just follows the older sister, she is the most *****iest.
7) To be fair, the older one has also changed a lot. She used to look so pretty, but now she dyed her hair blonde (it looks strange now)and she got lip fillers.
Thanks for listening, Rant over . (AMA btw x)
Scroll to see replies
Also, one last thing i would like to add is that im not saying/implying that i hate everyone on my dads side. My Aunties/phuppos and their husbands (my uncles/taya abus) are extremely nice and i swear to god they have done so much for me ever since i came into this world. I pray that god keep em safe.
And remember, if your ever in the same position, talk to someone, preferabely ur mum x.
Stand up to them!
And remember, if your ever in the same position, talk to someone, preferabely ur mum x.
Stand up to them!
Original post by Anonymous
Sit down everyone, grab a bag of popcorn, its a long one:
So, on my dads side of the family, he has 2 sisters (my aunties/phuppos). Lets call the younger one Y, and the older one Z. Aunty Y has 2 daughters (15 and 16) . Aunty Z has 4 kids (Daughters 22 and 30, sons 36 and idk the other one) but anyways, my whole life my aunty z and her kids lived in england, born and raised here, just like me. Aunt Z was like my second mum, i spent 1/2 if not more of my childhood there as my parents used to often work a lot. And aunty Y, she lived in pakistan for a bit but when her kids where age 4 and 5, they moved to england (2009).
Recently , (since last year), Aunty Z's daughters (her sons are nice), have become extremely *****y and toxic. The oldest daughter was getting married last year, and she did certain things like kicked us outta her room while keeping aunty y's cousins in her room. She would give us dirty looks, she would not talk to us. Point is, she treats me and my sis and my bro like ****ing ****, and she treats aunty y's daughters like princesses.
Some things i would like to address:
1) My mum told me that Aunty Z's kids were always rude and spoiled and like this in general so i shouldnt worry too much.
2) I am making this annonymous for a reason
3) Aunty y's daughters are also quite annoying and rude but not too much.
4) All of my life (well, the first 10-12 years anyways) i looked upto aunty z's kids, thinking they were awesome and perfect.
5) My dad and i are quite close, so he knows about the issue. He tried addressing it to his sister (aunty z) and then her oldest daughter started to become rlly nice to me and now shes just *****y again.
6) I know i said aunty z has 2 daughters, but the younger one itsnt that rude she just follows the older sister, she is the most *****iest.
7) To be fair, the older one has also changed a lot. She used to look so pretty, but now she dyed her hair blonde (it looks strange now)and she got lip fillers.
Thanks for listening, Rant over . (AMA btw x)
So, on my dads side of the family, he has 2 sisters (my aunties/phuppos). Lets call the younger one Y, and the older one Z. Aunty Y has 2 daughters (15 and 16) . Aunty Z has 4 kids (Daughters 22 and 30, sons 36 and idk the other one) but anyways, my whole life my aunty z and her kids lived in england, born and raised here, just like me. Aunt Z was like my second mum, i spent 1/2 if not more of my childhood there as my parents used to often work a lot. And aunty Y, she lived in pakistan for a bit but when her kids where age 4 and 5, they moved to england (2009).
Recently , (since last year), Aunty Z's daughters (her sons are nice), have become extremely *****y and toxic. The oldest daughter was getting married last year, and she did certain things like kicked us outta her room while keeping aunty y's cousins in her room. She would give us dirty looks, she would not talk to us. Point is, she treats me and my sis and my bro like ****ing ****, and she treats aunty y's daughters like princesses.
Some things i would like to address:
1) My mum told me that Aunty Z's kids were always rude and spoiled and like this in general so i shouldnt worry too much.
2) I am making this annonymous for a reason
3) Aunty y's daughters are also quite annoying and rude but not too much.
4) All of my life (well, the first 10-12 years anyways) i looked upto aunty z's kids, thinking they were awesome and perfect.
5) My dad and i are quite close, so he knows about the issue. He tried addressing it to his sister (aunty z) and then her oldest daughter started to become rlly nice to me and now shes just *****y again.
6) I know i said aunty z has 2 daughters, but the younger one itsnt that rude she just follows the older sister, she is the most *****iest.
7) To be fair, the older one has also changed a lot. She used to look so pretty, but now she dyed her hair blonde (it looks strange now)and she got lip fillers.
Thanks for listening, Rant over . (AMA btw x)
As somebody who lives in a toxic family I recommend the “taste your own medicine” approach.
Sit down with them, and tell them that the way they’re treating you/others is unacceptable and from now on they will be treated with as much respect as they treat others. If they treat you kinder you will treat them the same way.
They will probably be unhappy about this but all you have to say is “I/others deserve respect, I won’t treat you with respect and kindness unless you treat me the same way. If you want respect then you have to give it to me/others too.”
Then treat them the same way they treat you, it’ll be rough at first but give it a week or two and you’ll start to see improvement.
Good luck!
Original post by Blueclueless
As somebody who lives in a toxic family I recommend the “taste your own medicine” approach.
Sit down with them, and tell them that the way they’re treating you/others is unacceptable and from now on they will be treated with as much respect as they treat others. If they treat you kinder you will treat them the same way.
They will probably be unhappy about this but all you have to say is “I/others deserve respect, I won’t treat you with respect and kindness unless you treat me the same way. If you want respect then you have to give it to me/others too.”
Then treat them the same way they treat you, it’ll be rough at first but give it a week or two and you’ll start to see improvement.
Good luck!
Sit down with them, and tell them that the way they’re treating you/others is unacceptable and from now on they will be treated with as much respect as they treat others. If they treat you kinder you will treat them the same way.
They will probably be unhappy about this but all you have to say is “I/others deserve respect, I won’t treat you with respect and kindness unless you treat me the same way. If you want respect then you have to give it to me/others too.”
Then treat them the same way they treat you, it’ll be rough at first but give it a week or two and you’ll start to see improvement.
Good luck!
I'm sorry, but that is not the way to go about this, or at least not in an Asian one.Original post by Blueclueless
As somebody who lives in a toxic family I recommend the “taste your own medicine” approach.
Sit down with them, and tell them that the way they’re treating you/others is unacceptable and from now on they will be treated with as much respect as they treat others. If they treat you kinder you will treat them the same way.
They will probably be unhappy about this but all you have to say is “I/others deserve respect, I won’t treat you with respect and kindness unless you treat me the same way. If you want respect then you have to give it to me/others too.”
Then treat them the same way they treat you, it’ll be rough at first but give it a week or two and you’ll start to see improvement.
Good luck!
Sit down with them, and tell them that the way they’re treating you/others is unacceptable and from now on they will be treated with as much respect as they treat others. If they treat you kinder you will treat them the same way.
They will probably be unhappy about this but all you have to say is “I/others deserve respect, I won’t treat you with respect and kindness unless you treat me the same way. If you want respect then you have to give it to me/others too.”
Then treat them the same way they treat you, it’ll be rough at first but give it a week or two and you’ll start to see improvement.
Good luck!
Thats perfect thanks! But i dont think ill be able to do this coming from a muslim fam. They arent as understanding as others. (no offence evry1 x)
Original post by Xarao I'm sorry, but that is not the way to go about this, or at least not in an Asian one.
I'm sorry, but that is not the way to go about this, or at least not in an Asian one.I think blueclueless has an AMAZING point, but yeah ur right it'll never work in an asian fam
Original post by Anonymous
Thats perfect thanks! But i dont think ill be able to do this coming from a muslim fam. They arent as understanding as others. (no offence evry1 x)
I understand, I hope you find some way to make it work! You deserve respect, maybe just stop talking to them/walk away if they’re being rude to you?
Original post by Anonymous
I think blueclueless has an AMAZING point, but yeah ur right it'll never work in an asian fam
Yeah I agree, but we both know from Muslim families that ain't the way. Honestly speaking though, you can't do much about her and just have to leave it be.
Also, the problem is that im not vry confident. And i did (try to) stand up to them once, but they only showed like a little emotion. BAsically the night b4 one of her wedding occasions , aunty y's 2 daughters, and her were in her room and me and my sis and bro were in the living room all alone. So my aunty asked me to give her something. They were all laughing inside and i knocked on the door, i walked in and my 2 siblings followed, and my cousin was like 'Right can everyone just stop coming in??' and then i was like 'yeah alright i get when im not wanted' i stormed out, i was like to my siblings 'come on lets get out guys'. I went to living room and aunty z's youngest daughter the 18 y/o one said 'aww sweetheart dont worry, its just that she was doing something and u shoulda knocked' and then aunty y's 2 daughters tried to comfort me and im like in my mind ***** I DID KNOCK. And then my toxic cuz was like to me later on, 'darling i only said that bc there were a lot of ppl, at the end of the day we r all sisters and we love each other , right?'
And thats where im gonna end it x
And thats where im gonna end it x
Original post by Blueclueless
I understand, I hope you find some way to make it work! You deserve respect, maybe just stop talking to them/walk away if they’re being rude to you?
Thanks everyone , i wish it was this simple. Now Miss Toxic ***** is having a baby in october. Doubt she will even let me near it
Also, another thing is that on her wedding we all had to dance (on muslim weddings everyone dances.) So long story short:
we had to give Miss toxic ***** the song names we had to dance on, but we didnt know we had to do that, so on the wedding DAY:
Aunty y's 2 daughters did like 4 dances.
My dad had to fight the fricking dj to put my and my sisters song on so we could dance. No one even looked at us , only her husband did who by the way is so nice she dont deserve him .
We found out like 3 weeks later that we had to give the song names in order to dance
we had to give Miss toxic ***** the song names we had to dance on, but we didnt know we had to do that, so on the wedding DAY:
Aunty y's 2 daughters did like 4 dances.
My dad had to fight the fricking dj to put my and my sisters song on so we could dance. No one even looked at us , only her husband did who by the way is so nice she dont deserve him .
We found out like 3 weeks later that we had to give the song names in order to dance
Original post by Anonymous
Also, another thing is that on her wedding we all had to dance (on muslim weddings everyone dances.) So long story short:
we had to give Miss toxic ***** the song names we had to dance on, but we didnt know we had to do that, so on the wedding DAY:
Aunty y's 2 daughters did like 4 dances.
My dad had to fight the fricking dj to put my and my sisters song on so we could dance. No one even looked at us , only her husband did who by the way is so nice she dont deserve him .
We found out like 3 weeks later that we had to give the song names in order to dance
we had to give Miss toxic ***** the song names we had to dance on, but we didnt know we had to do that, so on the wedding DAY:
Aunty y's 2 daughters did like 4 dances.
My dad had to fight the fricking dj to put my and my sisters song on so we could dance. No one even looked at us , only her husband did who by the way is so nice she dont deserve him .
We found out like 3 weeks later that we had to give the song names in order to dance
Its like sabotage on purpouse. Oh, and did i forget to mention that all 4 of them had private lessons, excluding me and my sister?
Oof, not an muslim but an south asian guy here, i have to say dad sides are always the toxic one, i dont hate my dad sides of the family but after i went to visit my homecountry after 11 years(born and raised in Hong kong), i met with most of my relatives and i can say this that i prefer mom side of the family more than dad side although i dont know my mom side family more than dad side.
Private DANCE lessons*.
And sorry i keep sneding os many threads it wont let me edit them.
honestly, there have been some days where i would cry to my mum because thats how hurt i was. The hurt is still here, one year later.
Also, when aunty y and her 2 kids came to england, all 4 of them would always fight. How are they all of a sudden friends?????
And sorry i keep sneding os many threads it wont let me edit them.
honestly, there have been some days where i would cry to my mum because thats how hurt i was. The hurt is still here, one year later.
Also, when aunty y and her 2 kids came to england, all 4 of them would always fight. How are they all of a sudden friends?????
Original post by Anonymous
Oof, not an muslim but an south asian guy here, i have to say dad sides are always the toxic one, i dont hate my dad sides of the family but after i went to visit my homecountry after 11 years(born and raised in Hong kong), i met with most of my relatives and i can say this that i prefer mom side of the family more than dad side although i dont know my mom side family more than dad side.
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
MUMS SIDE OF THE FAMILY IS THE BEST SIDE>
my mums sister and brothers kids are sooooo sweet and nice and they are not fake or full of plastic at all.
They are the extreme opposite of toxic and always make me laugh.
Original post by Anonymous
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
MUMS SIDE OF THE FAMILY IS THE BEST SIDE>
my mums sister and brothers kids are sooooo sweet and nice and they are not fake or full of plastic at all.
They are the extreme opposite of toxic and always make me laugh.
MUMS SIDE OF THE FAMILY IS THE BEST SIDE>
my mums sister and brothers kids are sooooo sweet and nice and they are not fake or full of plastic at all.
They are the extreme opposite of toxic and always make me laugh.
Exactly ☺️
LOl my aunty was just telling me yesterday that when i was born (15 years ago ) miss toxic ***** was about 16-ish and she used to change my nappies haha. sorry just thought i would share lol
Serves the b*tch right doesnt it?
Wish you had **** explosively on her when she changed nappies😂😂
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