do I settle for fwb?

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Anonymous #1
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I’m 18 and I’ve never been in a relationship. I can’t see myself getting in one in the next year and then I’ll be moving to uni anyway so potentially it’s not worth the time. I go to an all girls school so I mainly speak to guys who are mutuals online and especially atm everything’s more online. There’s a guy I spoke to a couple months back and he’s reappeared now that things are less strict. He clearly only wants fwb and nothing more and I don’t really have any feelings towards him further than that. So do I just say duck it and start with him or do I keep waiting and pretending that some how a relationship will appear?
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username5447420
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m 18 and I’ve never been in a relationship. I can’t see myself getting in one in the next year and then I’ll be moving to uni anyway so potentially it’s not worth the time. I go to an all girls school so I mainly speak to guys who are mutuals online and especially atm everything’s more online. There’s a guy I spoke to a couple months back and he’s reappeared now that things are less strict. He clearly only wants fwb and nothing more and I don’t really have any feelings towards him further than that. So do I just say duck it and start with him or do I keep waiting and pretending that some how a relationship will appear?
Well, this may seem crude, but you can do both.

If he only wants FWB and your open to the idea, then you both can set some rules and boundaries, one being that IF you find a guy who likes you and you like him back then the FWB stops and you pursue the relationship with the new guy.

You both may end up falling in love through FWB anyway, just because you don't like him now doesn't mean you may come to love him later after having spent time with him.
Last edited by username5447420; 1 month ago
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Surnia
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The fact that you say 'settle' for FWB in the title makes me say no, don't do it. So what if you haven't had a relationship at 18? You've only been of an age to date for a very short period of time. You don't have to pretend that something might happen, you just carry on and live your life and study and achieve what you want, and if it just so happens that someone appears that you want a relationship with, great. I hadn't been bothered about relationships, and met my boyfriend at work when I was a lot older than you are currently...But if that hadn't happened, it wouldn't have bothered me because I'm happy in myself and with what I do.
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CyclinZH1
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Why not? In other cultures it's very common. Just go for it.
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IVLIVSCAESAR
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I’m 18 and I’ve never been in a relationship. I can’t see myself getting in one in the next year and then I’ll be moving to uni anyway so potentially it’s not worth the time. I go to an all girls school so I mainly speak to guys who are mutuals online and especially atm everything’s more online. There’s a guy I spoke to a couple months back and he’s reappeared now that things are less strict. He clearly only wants fwb and nothing more and I don’t really have any feelings towards him further than that. So do I just say duck it and start with him or do I keep waiting and pretending that some how a relationship will appear?
I would probably recommend not, unless it's something that you're positive that you want to do. For better or for worse, many potential partners in the future would look down on a girl routinely having casual sex. I'm not saying that to be controversial either, it's simply the truth
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