Do you care what people think

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Anonymous #1
#1
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I have bad anxiety, I’m introverted and also care what people think of me wayyy too much!
I seem to want everyone to like me or think good of me, this causes me pain as I can’t control this.
I want to stop being like this as it holds me back so much, I’m always worrying are people thinking bad of me or talking about me, saying I’m boring, weird or other things. How can I stop this and do you care what other people think of you?
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Agent456
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Trust me, no one is bothered, people are just minding their own business and doing their own thing, its all in your head
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CaptainDuckie
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No one cares about what you are doing.
Everybody has problems with their own lives, if you think people are thinking about you, trust me they are not.
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BluMoon06
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I care what people think of me but only to a certain extent. I don’t let what people think hold me back because I know I can’t not be myself, that’s what makes me me. If you’re struggling just try not to focus on those thought. Eg this outfit doesn’t look good on me cos my legs. Find a solution or say yet. That helped me a lot when I was struggling with self esteem and confidence. Also if they say mean things to you or you over hear, think to your self that they’re jealous because 9/10 times, that’s the true reason.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Agent456)
Trust me, no one is bothered, people are just minding their own business and doing their own thing, its all in your head
(Original post by CaptainDuckie)
No one cares about what you are doing.
Everybody has problems with their own lives, if you think people are thinking about you, trust me they are not.
Some do care, like I know that my brother has talked about me behind my back, saying thinks like I’m negative and boring. Or even saying false things, my dad told me about it in the past. I let it bother me too much as I worry what others think of me. I have a problem with wanting people to like me.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by BluMoon06)
I care what people think of me but only to a certain extent. I don’t let what people think hold me back because I know I can’t not be myself, that’s what makes me me. If you’re struggling just try not to focus on those thought. Eg this outfit doesn’t look good on me cos my legs. Find a solution or say yet. That helped me a lot when I was struggling with self esteem and confidence. Also if they say mean things to you or you over hear, think to your self that they’re jealous because 9/10 times, that’s the true reason.
Yeah I let it hold me back that’s my problem, I have found out in the past people in my family talking bad behind my back but acting nice to my face. I am like living in a bad way where I let what others think of me kinda control my life.
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tinygirl96
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Nah. I don't really care
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sunny.side.up
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I'm in the middle, I care what people think, but it won't stop me from doing what I like or want.
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netflix84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have bad anxiety, I’m introverted and also care what people think of me wayyy too much!
I seem to want everyone to like me or think good of me, this causes me pain as I can’t control this.
I want to stop being like this as it holds me back so much, I’m always worrying are people thinking bad of me or talking about me, saying I’m boring, weird or other things. How can I stop this and do you care what other people think of you?
as an extrovert I can say that I'm not exempt from sometimes caring what others think of me, but honestly its mostly true that strangers have no opinion towards me, and to get an actual response from one,id probably have to trip over air and fall face first into a telephone box, which would suck.
so just chill, and dont take things too seriously (not always ofc), also learn to laugh at yourself sometimes, ive found its a great way to improve things
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londonmyst
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Not random strangers.
Nor the unpleasant people I know that have a long history as criminal troublemakers or malicious gossipers.
It is impossible to always please everyone.

Don't allow your happiness & self-esteem to be dependent upon other people having a positive opinion of your personal achievements, looks or anything else.
Happiness has to come from your own positive choices, thoughts, achievements and values.
Never allow biological relatives, random strangers or any of the world's bad apples to ruin your peace of mind and devalue your life.
Those with a habit of constantly imposing their negativity upon all other people are not worth your emotion or time- don't give them any.
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks for the replies guys, just want to make it clear I don’t mean strangers I mean friends & family. I care way too much what they think, I feel my brother is quite passive aggressive with me, he also talks behind my back & tries to influence others opinions, it bothers me a lot
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netflix84
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks for the replies guys, just want to make it clear I don’t mean strangers I mean friends & family. I care way too much what they think, I feel my brother is quite passive aggressive with me, he also talks behind my back & tries to influence others opinions, it bothers me a lot
i think your best bet would be to confront him, at this point there's not much else to do but to get to the root of the problem- which is him.
besides, boring is such an umbrella term; and im very sure you're not boring.
nowadays if someone doesn't swear every 2 seconds or makes fun of others they could be deemed boring- but obvs that not the case.
unless anyone says if to your face, assume nothing and keep going on with your day, and if they do say something, tell them to shove it up their butt (or just think it, if you prefer), because some people thrive on negativity and their words hold no value.
you seem strong, so i hope everything works out for you
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LovelyMrFox
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Eh, not really. There will always be someone that doesnt like you for whatever reason, some people just dont get along and thats perfectly fine. At the end of the day, if someone doesnt like you thats their problem, not yours.
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username5447420
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I have bad anxiety, I’m introverted and also care what people think of me wayyy too much!
I seem to want everyone to like me or think good of me, this causes me pain as I can’t control this.
I want to stop being like this as it holds me back so much, I’m always worrying are people thinking bad of me or talking about me, saying I’m boring, weird or other things. How can I stop this and do you care what other people think of you?
I suffered from this same self-conscious anxiety for the first 28 years of my life, It wasn't until I realised that everyone was so worried about what other people thought of them, that I realised everyone is so busy thinking about themselves that they don't care what you look like.

Just be yourself, seriously. That's the secret. be you, always strive to better yourself, but be yourself in the process and you will be fine.
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Blue_skies124
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I just thought do I care about what others do? And I thought no So why would others care about what they think of me
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ROTL94
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I used to when I was a teenager. Never got me anywhere good, now I am in my mid 20s I don't give a tart's furry cup what people think of me, which has actually got me to reasonably good places.
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Cognitivist
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I have a very close friend who used to have precisely the same trait. After we had met with each other, I realised that he has the same problem. He was overly sensitive, always questioning our friendship and skeptic about me; and some other cringe things happened etc. I have been patient and not said anything to offend him for a few months since I knew saying anything slightly negative would make him feel terrified. Then, I've decided to have a conversation and told him my concerns about him. He said that he cannot help sometimes being anxious about everything especially about losing friends as he lost many in the past. Anyway, I don't want to write an essay, but the thing is, I also said this to him, you cannot just say I am like this and cannot help but to be it then you are being delusional. Believe me every individual is anxious, shy, introverted at the beginning of their life. However, they grow out of it as they age and socialise. Socialising is might be one of the vital element and superior power of mankind. To sum up, take a step and change for the better, SOCIALISE!

Hope this cheers you up Anon
Last edited by Cognitivist; 1 month ago
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by netflix84)
i think your best bet would be to confront him, at this point there's not much else to do but to get to the root of the problem- which is him.
besides, boring is such an umbrella term; and im very sure you're not boring.
nowadays if someone doesn't swear every 2 seconds or makes fun of others they could be deemed boring- but obvs that not the case.
unless anyone says if to your face, assume nothing and keep going on with your day, and if they do say something, tell them to shove it up their butt (or just think it, if you prefer), because some people thrive on negativity and their words hold no value.
you seem strong, so i hope everything works out for you
I have confronted him in the past and all he does is deny everything and say I’m paranoid or that the other person is lying. I think he is a narcissist or he is a very jealous competitive person, also I don’t like confrontation or drama, I think I may just distance myself from him, it’s difficult as he is my brother and is close with some others I am close with. He is a really passive aggressive person, I have to say even though he is my brother I actually don’t like him.
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Anonymous #1
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Also thanks to the other peoples replies it is really helpful, I feel like a fearful anxious person trying to please everyone, I’m starting to realise this doesn’t work and it tires me out, my issue is I find it difficult to let go of people judging me or thinking bad of me, it’s like I’m ruled by fear, I find it difficult to say no to people aswell.
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Joleee
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only care about my employer, teachers and maybe my landlord cuz they can affect my livelihood, but not no one else, no. it can take a lot of practise but once you realise you only need a few good friends and that no one is thinking about you as much as you think they do it changes your perspective. i would say keep telling yourself that but please don’t beat yourself up because it’s hard to break patterns of thinking (probably one of the hardest things in life).
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