A weird situation.

So do things where you need women in real life, but start by making friends with them and not coming over as desperate for a relationship.

F, and I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 30...

Hi lads, this might sound a bit sad- and believe me, I’m fully aware that it is, however, because it’s been a struggle and still is a struggle of mine; I thought I’d share this in hopes that I’m not the only one going through this.

So, about to be 20. Never had a girlfriend or anything- and as shocking as that sounds, it’s just the truth to be honest. Not a really social person, so I can count the amount of times I’ve actually tried talking to women irl and it’s been about 4 times I’ve tried in all 19 years of my existence.

When it’s online, it’s just dry and long responses in text messages from girls, and i’m aware that they are signs of no interest, so I think that they’re just not interested in general- and it will affect your self esteem massively, over time.

Makes no sense to me that after literal years of trying to form some sort of a relationship with a woman, and it’s mostly- all online, there seems to be a constant pattern of them not being interested whatsoever even though all I’m trying to do is conversate and be myself.

Because this has kept on happening for time, it has lowered my confidence and self esteem massively. I’m not the best looking- but I’m not bad looking, so I can’t see why it’s a constant pattern.

Any advice or help would be sound. Just looking for advice in general.

unless you're a Brad Pitt lookalike who's very popular with lots of money and has all of the physical attributes girls crave for, you're going to deal with quite a number of rejections.

Remind me how successful Brad Pitt has been in his long-term relationships; divorced twice, isn't it?

Personality is key.

Yeah, but at least he got attention which is the problem that the OP is having because he's having conversations with these women and they're not showing any signs of interest. If a woman is not even ready to give their time of the day, then you can't even get into a relationship.

What is more sad is the fact that you're not the only one in this situation. Dating for men is incredibly brutal these days. Girls have extremely high standards and will not lower them until they get a bit older and reach their late twenties or early thirties. This is because of the shift of societal expectations over the decades. And the fact that you're not social makes it a hundred times worse. The truth is that talking to girls online is probably the worst way of forming a relationship. You can communicate with a girl online only during the initial stages but you should be trying to ask her out in real life and ask her out on a date.

Also, you said you tried 4 times. Believe me, that's nothing. Most average guys try hundreds of times. You need to develop a tough skin and get used to rejection. You have to accept that unless you're a Brad Pitt lookalike who's very popular with lots of money and has all of the physical attributes girls crave for, you're going to deal with quite a number of rejections. It's not unusual for girls to seem uninterested or bored. What you should know is that they get too much attention every day. They live in a different world to us. They base their own self-worth on things like social media and they get so much attention. Their perspectives and thinking is different and their brains are wired differently. They don't experience things that we experience. It's nobody's fault, but that's what it is.