You can't get feedback on it really but I would suggest going through and writing a list of things you're not sure about, e.g.
- word order after Als
- konjunctiv 2
- indirect speech
From here, write alternative sentences on a different topic but using each of the grammar things on the list, then ask for help with those from your teacher, and go back and apply the new knowledge to your IRP sentences. I personally keep a notebook with all the sentences where something wrong in, then I highlight whatever's wrong and rewrite it correctly. That way I can easily apply what I learn to new contexts.