The Student Room Group

Does a kiss mean anything??

We're very very close, it's been a whole "will they, won't they" for over a year. We say we're just friends but it's borderline not.
Now, we kissed. Does that mean we're together, coz we haven't said anything about that and i don't want to be the first to break the spell??
Original post by Anonymous
We're very very close, it's been a whole "will they, won't they" for over a year. We say we're just friends but it's borderline not.
Now, we kissed. Does that mean we're together, coz we haven't said anything about that and i don't want to be the first to break the spell??


Ah the moment you get the kiss depends to be honest my partner did that had me go all red to the face.
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous
Ah the moment you get the kiss depends to be honest my partner did that had me go all red to the face.

I mean; We kissed for a while. And kept going back for more
But idk what that means!
Is it just a given that we're a thing now?
Original post by Anonymous
I mean; We kissed for a while. And kept going back for more
But idk what that means!
Is it just a given that we're a thing now?


Maybe for me the first move was made by my partner when she kissed me
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
Maybe for me the first move was made by my partner when she kissed me

Oh
But that still leaves me with so many questions! What do I think??
Original post by Anonymous
Oh
But that still leaves me with so many questions! What do I think??


I think the obvious thing is that kiss clearly had a meaning and if you guys have kissed numerous times you can’t tell me there isn’t anything between you guys…
You can have sex with someone and it not mean a thing.

A kiss doesn't mean you're together, no.
(edited 9 months ago)
Reply 7
Oh... good to know... thank you!
Reply 8
The important question is, do you wish it meant something? It's fine to ask if it means something but if you don't want to be in a relationship with each other then the kiss doesn't really matter. In the end, it only matters as much as you want it to.
Reply 9
I do want it to mean something, but i don't want to ruin whatever it is that we are rn by saying something. We're already in such a relationship-y place without ever giving it the title. I don't want to mess it up by asking...
You could be subtle and ask them what they think your relationship is, hinting that it could be something more. That said I know how you feel, this sort of feeling is difficult.
Reply 11
I'm so confused but so happy. I think I'll build up to that conversation, we have midterms now and i don't want to have any conversation that will mess with either of our heads.
Thank you so much for the advice though!
You're welcome. The worst feeling you could have in this situation would be to have lost them while wishing that it had gone a different way. I've had multiple experiences like that and they've all been dreadful, so I'd urge you to (slowly) try to move things towards the way you want it.
In other words a kiss could be anything from 'this feels nice but it ain't going anywhere', to, 'I want to marry you, have my babies and die in your arm's". With anything and everything in between lol.
(edited 9 months ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I do want it to mean something, but i don't want to ruin whatever it is that we are rn by saying something. We're already in such a relationship-y place without ever giving it the title. I don't want to mess it up by asking...

If what you have now is genuinely what you think it is, how will asking what the kiss meant to them change anything? If you're right about it, surely it won't change anything? And if you're wrong about it, that's obviously going to be disappointing, but at least you will know.

Lots of people don't ask people that they have a crush on or want to go out with if they feel the same way for the fear of rejection. They enjoy the idea of that person wanting to be with them, and sort of satisfy themselves with fantasy, knowing that if the other person does reject them then even the fantasy goes away. But the reality is that that status quo doesn't help anybody. If you want to be with someone, tell them about it and see how they feel. If they reject you, at least you know. In your situation I'd think it's pretty likely that they want to be with you as well. As you say, you've been in this situation for a while where it's clear that something could happen, and now something has, so it's likely that you both feel the same way. You do, of course, have more to lose, because you are close to them in a way that a lot of people aren't before they ask someone out. But in my view you're fundamentally in the same position. You want this to be something more than it currently is. So ask how the other person feels. In practice there really isn't anything to 'mess up', because if they don't feel the same way then you're probably not really where you think you are anyway, and in practice even that isn't where you want to be. Given that you've just kissed (and, by all accounts, it was a bit more than a peck on the cheek), I'd say now is the perfect time to ask.
Original post by Anonymous
We're very very close, it's been a whole "will they, won't they" for over a year. We say we're just friends but it's borderline not.
Now, we kissed. Does that mean we're together, coz we haven't said anything about that and i don't want to be the first to break the spell??

Yes it means something
Reply 16
Original post by Crazy Jamie
If what you have now is genuinely what you think it is, how will asking what the kiss meant to them change anything? If you're right about it, surely it won't change anything? And if you're wrong about it, that's obviously going to be disappointing, but at least you will know.

Lots of people don't ask people that they have a crush on or want to go out with if they feel the same way for the fear of rejection. They enjoy the idea of that person wanting to be with them, and sort of satisfy themselves with fantasy, knowing that if the other person does reject them then even the fantasy goes away. But the reality is that that status quo doesn't help anybody. If you want to be with someone, tell them about it and see how they feel. If they reject you, at least you know. In your situation I'd think it's pretty likely that they want to be with you as well. As you say, you've been in this situation for a while where it's clear that something could happen, and now something has, so it's likely that you both feel the same way. You do, of course, have more to lose, because you are close to them in a way that a lot of people aren't before they ask someone out. But in my view you're fundamentally in the same position. You want this to be something more than it currently is. So ask how the other person feels. In practice there really isn't anything to 'mess up', because if they don't feel the same way then you're probably not really where you think you are anyway, and in practice even that isn't where you want to be. Given that you've just kissed (and, by all accounts, it was a bit more than a peck on the cheek), I'd say now is the perfect time to ask.

Woah. Ok you're right
Thank you so much!
Reply 17
Original post by Eric wagon
Yes it means something

Exactly what i wanted to hear, but overthinking doesn't want to believe it...

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