I feel like dropping out sometimes

Hi,

I'm a 19-year-old girl who attends a college in Scotland, I started college as soon as I moved here in January (I'm from England). Last year I studied media and this year I am studying art.

I feel like dropping out some days, and today is one of those days.

There are many reasons why I want to drop out, one reason is that I feel like the classes demand a lot and sometimes it's a struggle to keep up. One other reason is that I feel like everyone in the class is better than me since some do art in their spare time. and the last (and main) reason is that I can't understand anyone in the class.

It feels very isolating being at that college despite being surrounded by people, I'm not sure if it's due to the fact that the people who sit with me don't talk or if it's due to the accents.
Most of my day is spent alone, I spend break-time and lunch-time in this small, shutdown cafe in the college. The only interaction I have with people is teachers and canteen staff. other students and I do chat every once in a while, but the chats don't last long.

I dread going to it and I can't wait to finish next year.

Reply 1

Muttly

20

I understand your sense of loneliness. When you know no one it is a hard place to be just sat in a class, and worse when everyone leaves, being alone and no contact. It may seem a long year but in a few more weeks you will break up for Christmas and then you are nearly finished for the year.

Why do you feel the classes demand a lot? Are you struggling being able to produce something wonderful amongst others who make it seem effortless? Yes that is hard and difficult to deal with. Does your love of art transcend all the concerns about your lack of ability? Please chat with your tutors and ask for advice and help.

Hold your own court. Eventually someone will normally be curious enough to ask questions about you. Just remain open and friendly and eventually a shift will occur. Be ok with the Scottish accent and any difficulty understanding the dialects. It is strange but tilt your head and just listen for key words. Eventually you will hear the meanings. I shared a room with a student who was Scottish and they would rattle away in 'Scottish' and I realised I hadn't a clue what they had said. You pick up on all of the mannerisms, facial expressions and tone of voice to try and decipher what has been said. Eventually after about a few months 'they' slowed down enough to put up with this incapable and useless 'child' in their midst. But as soon as my room mate went home and came back to halls again it was a nightmare trying to 'read between the lines' We had many laughs about my illiteracy in all things Scottish. The Scottish are the best; friendly, straightforward and very very accepting of others.

You obviously had a reason for studying the course you applied for? Why are you giving up so easily? If your choice of course is a bad one, any problems with communication with your course mates will be compounded. If you feel you have made such a big mistake and cannot cope with the demands of the course go back to course admin and see what your options are.

Socialising - Monitor your own non verbal communication signs. Are you inward looking and you don't see what is right under your nose? If you expect this to be all about you then you are misguided. You have to make the effort to be brave and reach out and just talk to others sharing your love of art - or not? No one will 'come to you' Even if you are unsuccessful then you have to keep trying. You may not gel with the first few people you meet but there are thousands of students and experiences to go at. You have to approach others, and keep doing it. Sometimes this will be a good ending, other times not. But you don't give up and add it to the list of reasons to be even more introspective. Never give up - ever.

Go to your College welfare section and explain how you feel. They may have students who are only too willing to take you under their wing. But remember to take the dialogue and make it about others, their interests, their concerns, their life. Not about you and the 'poor me' dialogue.

Reply 2

University of Strathclyde

Official Rep

15

Original post by GlitterBug04

Hi,

I'm a 19-year-old girl who attends a college in Scotland, I started college as soon as I moved here in January (I'm from England). Last year I studied media and this year I am studying art.

I feel like dropping out some days, and today is one of those days.

There are many reasons why I want to drop out, one reason is that I feel like the classes demand a lot and sometimes it's a struggle to keep up. One other reason is that I feel like everyone in the class is better than me since some do art in their spare time. and the last (and main) reason is that I can't understand anyone in the class.

It feels very isolating being at that college despite being surrounded by people, I'm not sure if it's due to the fact that the people who sit with me don't talk or if it's due to the accents.
Most of my day is spent alone, I spend break-time and lunch-time in this small, shutdown cafe in the college. The only interaction I have with people is teachers and canteen staff. other students and I do chat every once in a while, but the chats don't last long.

I dread going to it and I can't wait to finish next year.

Hey @GlitterBug04! Really sorry to hear you're feeling this way, it sounds quite overwhelming :frown:

I'd echo a lot of what @Muttly has said here - all is not lost and while it can feel awkward trying to put yourself out there - if you're open to new friendships then things might feel better. Having someone in a similar age to you that's on your wavelength will help with a lot of the things that are bothering you - from having some peer support in class to helping you understand the accent more.

I'd definitely encourage you to speak to your teachers and let them know how you're feeling. If you've got exams coming up in the next year and you're feeling this way then that's not the best headspace to be in so reach out to them and let them know you need support :hugs: