The Student Room Group

do I drop out

I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable
@miawez123

You shouldn't drop out.

University is not all about friendships.

It may be that you are preoccupied with living a particular uni life and that this preoccupation is what is getting you down rather than your actual circumstances.

It sounds like there are lots of things are going really well for you, so try and focus on these things and remember that university is never going to be perfect.

Friendships grow and change, that's normal. Sometimes you will feel really tight with some people and other times you will feel closer to others: that's fine. When friendships get complicated, remember that you are at uni to get a degree!

All the best,

Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield
(edited 3 months ago)
Original post by miawez123
I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable

Hi,

I'm sorry to hear that you have been finding settling into university quite difficult but how you are feeling is a completely normal feeling.

I think we all have these worries about making friends when we first start university but please don't let friendships be the reason for dropping out, especially if you are enjoying your course. Try not to be so hard on yourself with friendships as everyone is still getting to know each other at the moment but given time you will find the people you bond with the most and find yourself with a tight-knit group of friends.

Try to suggest some activities to do with your classmates and see if they'd be interested in going for lunch or dinner after university someday. I found that doing this, allowed us to get to know each other properly and have a proper laugh together.

As I said, try to be patient as friendships are still evolving at the start of 1st year so give it time and try to see what friendships happen naturally as these friendships are usually the ones that last the longest!

I hope this is of some assistance and try not to let it turn you off your course as nursing is an amazing career and if it's something you are passionate about then nobody should get in the way of that,

Mary
London South Bank University Student Rep (3rd-year Children's Nursing)
Original post by miawez123
I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable

Hi there

I am sorry to hear that you are upset about your situation. However, I think dropping out may not be your best option.

A part of University life is the studies, so it is good to hear that you do not mind the course or lectures. Nursing is a really good course with a lot of potential for a future career. However, I do understand that friendships are important in University too.

Since it has only been halfway through the first semester, I know it can be difficult to make really meaningful friendships. It is good that you have a circle of friends already, whilst you may not know each other that well just yet, things could just take time to improve. It will take different amount of times for people to meet and make really good friends. So please try not to be too harsh on yourself. (As a more introverted person, this only occurred to be towards the end of the second semester, which is fine as well.) There is no pressure, and it is not a competition of how many people you know or how fast. Friendship groups can change throughout University, so take things at your own pace. You are already doing great! :smile:

Hope you feel better soon.
Chloe
University of Kent Student Rep
Original post by miawez123
I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable

Hey,
im also in my first year and im sort of similar to you. Dropping out is something i think about fairly often, before i even came to uni i wasnt sure the course im doing is for me - im still not 100%. I from the strart went with the mindset, we'll see at christmas. Over the xmas holdays i am really going to sit and sort of evaluate the whole experince, getting away from uni i think will help. So i think i will stay on at uni but i'm still going to really think it through at christmas, and from the start i told myself i had to get to christmas and then see, loads of people also say uni changes so much in 2nd term .
Might be worth you trying that?
Original post by miawez123
I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable

Hey, im also in my first year and im sort of similar to you. Dropping out is something i think about fairly often, before i even came to uni i wasnt sure the course im doing is for me - im still not 100%. I from the strart went with the mindset, we'll see at christmas. Over the xmas holdays i am really going to sit and sort of evaluate the whole experince, getting away from uni i think will help. So i think i will stay on at uni but i'm still going to really think it through at christmas, and from the start i told myself i had to get to christmas and then see, loads of people also say uni changes so much in 2nd term . Might be worth you trying that?
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous #1
Hey, im also in my first year and im sort of similar to you. Dropping out is something i think about fairly often, before i even came to uni i wasnt sure the course im doing is for me - im still not 100%. I from the strart went with the mindset, we'll see at christmas. Over the xmas holdays i am really going to sit and sort of evaluate the whole experince, getting away from uni i think will help. So i think i will stay on at uni but i'm still going to really think it through at christmas, and from the start i told myself i had to get to christmas and then see, loads of people also say uni changes so much in 2nd term . Might be worth you trying that?

Yea I’m thinking the same thing I want to see how much more I enjoy it in the second term however I think it’s gonna be a struggle coming back after Christmas
Original post by miawez123
I’m currently studying nursing and it’s my first year I’m
Like halfway through the first semester and feel like I’m not really doing well here . I actually don’t mind my course the lectures are sometimes interesting and I’ve made a nice group of friends on my course we don’t rly do much outside of uni tho which is a shame. I get on with a couple people in my flat and then there is a large group of a couple different flats we all go out together but within this groups there is little groups formed and I don’t feel like I’m involved in any of them i don’t always get included which is a shame. I do have friends that l already knew here and since coming here some of them have now became some of my best friends I just feel guilty for relying on them sometimes and sometimes they don’t want to introduce me to their friends as I think they want to separate uni and home friends. I feel I’ve kind of not failed and I should of branched out more than what I have I just feel lonely and I was really looking forward to coming and making some new good friends but I haven’t and it’s making me miserable

Hi there,

I am really sorry to hear that you are finding the first year of university hard. I personally found it really difficult and was feeling like it was impossible. I can say I am really glad I stuck it out as I am now a 4th year medical student and loving it. But that first semester was really difficult.
I think it is important to join different societies and clubs at uni so that you can meet people outside of your course and accommodation. You may find that you click with these people better. You have definitely not failed at all, you are doing really well and it sounds like there are some really positive things going on for you at the moment.

I hope this helps,

Ellen
Y4 Med student
Uni of Sunderland

Quick Reply

Latest