How do you know if you genuinely want/need change?
I've just started university, I study Chemistry. I dislike the course at my uni as it feels disorganised, with the teaching being subpar. I am also struggling to make friends and my mental health has declined.
The prospect of changing degrees is something that I find myself thinking about daily. But my questions are:
-How do you know when you need to change your current situation?
-How do you know you will be happier once you make that change, or if you will ever find happiness?
-How do you know it's not just a case of the grass being greener on the other side?
The prospect of changing degrees is something that I find myself thinking about daily. But my questions are:
-How do you know when you need to change your current situation?
-How do you know you will be happier once you make that change, or if you will ever find happiness?
-How do you know it's not just a case of the grass being greener on the other side?
Original post by Anonymous #1
I've just started university, I study Chemistry. I dislike the course at my uni as it feels disorganised, with the teaching being subpar. I am also struggling to make friends and my mental health has declined.
The prospect of changing degrees is something that I find myself thinking about daily. But my questions are:
-How do you know when you need to change your current situation?
-How do you know you will be happier once you make that change, or if you will ever find happiness?
-How do you know it's not just a case of the grass being greener on the other side?
The prospect of changing degrees is something that I find myself thinking about daily. But my questions are:
-How do you know when you need to change your current situation?
-How do you know you will be happier once you make that change, or if you will ever find happiness?
-How do you know it's not just a case of the grass being greener on the other side?
Hi there. I'm sorry to hear that you're not having the best time at University or with your mental health, I understand that Uni can be a really difficult environment at times.
I first went to University when I was 19. Long story short, I dropped out after three weeks. I realised I wasn't passionate about the course, it wasn't what I wanted for myself for three years. I was also far away from home and was upset as I'd had this expectation that I would make super strong friendships really quick. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way - these things do take time.
I'd be lying if I said my decision to leave was made rationally. My mental health had also reached an all time low and for me, it was go home or go further into a spiral.
A year later, I'm back at a University that is closer to home, doing a course that I feel a lot more interested in. This was absolutely the right decision for me, however, it was ultimately a knee-jerk reaction. I sometimes wonder how it would be if I'd stuck it out for longer.
You don't have to follow my advice but I would maybe advise:
1. Sticking it out until the end of at least the first semester to see if things improve - we're almost at Christmas so we're nearly there.
2. Speak to someone on campus about how you're feeling. If there is a mental health service available, I would really recommend reaching out & also telling your tutor or course leader about how you're feeling if you're comfortable doing so.
3. In terms of friendships, unfortunately, these do take time to build. Focus on you and doing the things you enjoy, you will then naturally attract the right people into your life (though admittedly I still struggle with friendships, I know how tough it can be)
Do whatever feels truly right for you. If you do decide to withdraw, know that everything will work out the way it's supposed to and you can reapply for next year. The only thing to note is the potential repayment of some of your student loan.
I was there for 3 weeks and over the last 12 months, I have had to pay back what is referred to as an overpayment (basically when you've borrowed money from the student loan company, used it, and need to pay it back). Each Uni will decide how much money they would like from you from your time there. This is unique to each University.
Whatever you decide to do, it will all be okay and work out in the end. Feel free to drop me a message if you need to talk or anything
I'm sorry to hear that 
Have you tried reaching to the wellbeing services at your SU? Joining a society is another way to get to know more people and make more friends!
Regarding your questions:
1) It's subjective. Do you feel like you'd be better off with a change? What exactly is prompting you to think about changing?
2) You don't, and no one can answer that for you but yourself.
3) Again, we're not clairvoyant here on TSR (though that would be cool!).
I'd advise sticking it out till the end of this semester at least and seeing how things are from there.
Have you tried reaching to the wellbeing services at your SU? Joining a society is another way to get to know more people and make more friends!Regarding your questions:
1) It's subjective. Do you feel like you'd be better off with a change? What exactly is prompting you to think about changing?
2) You don't, and no one can answer that for you but yourself.
3) Again, we're not clairvoyant here on TSR (though that would be cool!).
I'd advise sticking it out till the end of this semester at least and seeing how things are from there.
Original post by sleep_supremacy
I'm sorry to hear that Have you tried reaching to the wellbeing services at your SU? Joining a society is another way to get to know more people and make more friends!
Regarding your questions:
1) It's subjective. Do you feel like you'd be better off with a change? What exactly is prompting you to think about changing?
2) You don't, and no one can answer that for you but yourself.
3) Again, we're not clairvoyant here on TSR (though that would be cool!).
I'd advise sticking it out till the end of this semester at least and seeing how things are from there.
Have you tried reaching to the wellbeing services at your SU? Joining a society is another way to get to know more people and make more friends!Regarding your questions:
1) It's subjective. Do you feel like you'd be better off with a change? What exactly is prompting you to think about changing?
2) You don't, and no one can answer that for you but yourself.
3) Again, we're not clairvoyant here on TSR (though that would be cool!).
I'd advise sticking it out till the end of this semester at least and seeing how things are from there.
Yeah, I have talked to my student advisor at my university. She's very helpful and I know what I want but I feel like I'm using the idea of switching courses or universities as a vice to escape reality if that makes sense.
But sometimes It feels like I don't know what I genuinely want because I am invalidating what I want.
what if I'm blaming the university for my poor mental health as it comforts me to know the way I feel is due to an external factor?
Original post by Anonymous
Yeah, I have talked to my student advisor at my university. She's very helpful and I know what I want but I feel like I'm using the idea of switching courses or universities as a vice to escape reality if that makes sense.
But sometimes It feels like I don't know what I genuinely want because I am invalidating what I want.
what if I'm blaming the university for my poor mental health as it comforts me to know the way I feel is due to an external factor?
But sometimes It feels like I don't know what I genuinely want because I am invalidating what I want.
what if I'm blaming the university for my poor mental health as it comforts me to know the way I feel is due to an external factor?
I'd advise you to discuss this with a wellbeing advisor or trained professional at your uni as they will be best placed to assist you.
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