The Student Room Group

Second year housemates

I’ve chosen who I’m going to live with next year but am feeling slightly anxious because I don’t reckon they are the people that I will become closest with. There’s 5 girls including myself and I can see myself getting really close with 2 of them but not so much the other 2. However, I know I can live with them and that they are clean etc. I was just hoping if anyone can reassure me that you can still have some of your closest friends in separate houses and see them often.
Original post by Anonymous #1
I’ve chosen who I’m going to live with next year but am feeling slightly anxious because I don’t reckon they are the people that I will become closest with. There’s 5 girls including myself and I can see myself getting really close with 2 of them but not so much the other 2. However, I know I can live with them and that they are clean etc. I was just hoping if anyone can reassure me that you can still have some of your closest friends in separate houses and see them often.

Hi there

It is lovely to hear that you are already looking at accommodations for second year. It is completely normal not to live with all your clostest friends, though I understand why you would like to.

In second year, I did not live with my closest friends either, however, we were able to see each other nearly every day- going to each others flats, studying, and having meals together worked quite well for me even though I was doubtful at first.
I did not actually know most of my flatmates, but since they were all clean and tidy, I found it quite nice living with them. I think living with the 5 girls for a year could mean you become close friends too. So do not worry too much! :smile:

Hope this helps.
Chloe
University of Kent Student Rep
Original post by Anonymous #1
I’ve chosen who I’m going to live with next year but am feeling slightly anxious because I don’t reckon they are the people that I will become closest with. There’s 5 girls including myself and I can see myself getting really close with 2 of them but not so much the other 2. However, I know I can live with them and that they are clean etc. I was just hoping if anyone can reassure me that you can still have some of your closest friends in separate houses and see them often.

Hey there!

Of course you can! I went back into student accommodation for second year because I didn't get on with my first year flatmates and by the time I'd found my group of friends, they'd already got housing sorted for second year. They still went out of their way to invite me over in second year and I managed to keep up the friendship by putting in effort to make sure that it stood. If you put in the effort then there's no reason it can't work and I'm sure your housemates have friends in other houses as well that they're going to spend time with. You shouldn't limit yourself to just one group of friends at university, just do what's best for yourself and it will all work out.

Hope this helped!
Lucy - Digital Student Ambassador SHU
Original post by Anonymous #1
I’ve chosen who I’m going to live with next year but am feeling slightly anxious because I don’t reckon they are the people that I will become closest with. There’s 5 girls including myself and I can see myself getting really close with 2 of them but not so much the other 2. However, I know I can live with them and that they are clean etc. I was just hoping if anyone can reassure me that you can still have some of your closest friends in separate houses and see them often.

Hi there , I understand your concern because I've been there. It is easier to build close relationships with people that you live with because of the proximity but friendships can look like different things. You can build close and long lasting friendships with people you don't share a house with and you would have the added benefit that you would not fight about one another's living habits because you don't live together.
My best friend and I don't live in the same house but she is my favourite person in the world and I'm closer to her than anyone else we know. Living apart taught me that proximity is one thing that can make you close but a little distance can be healthy for relationships too. You have the space to miss the other person and also have stories to share when you do meet up. If you are in the same Uni or on the same course you will still see each other often and you can share extra curricular activities like societies to see each other more .
I hope this helps a little , your friendships can definitely still thrive even when you live apart as long as you stay intentional which it seems you already are . Good luck !
Cece✨
Energy Engineering
De Montfort University
Original post by Anonymous #1
I’ve chosen who I’m going to live with next year but am feeling slightly anxious because I don’t reckon they are the people that I will become closest with. There’s 5 girls including myself and I can see myself getting really close with 2 of them but not so much the other 2. However, I know I can live with them and that they are clean etc. I was just hoping if anyone can reassure me that you can still have some of your closest friends in separate houses and see them often.

Hi there,
First of all, it's quite acceptable to experience some anxiety regarding your living arrangements for the upcoming year. It's a significant aspect of college life, and many students experience comparable emotions.
It's fantastic that you will have two close friends with whom to share a future residence. The depth of your friendships isn't always determined by your shared residence. It is totally possible to stay in close contact with those two friends even when you live in different houses.
Living situations don't limit friendship. To sustain that bond, schedule frequent get-togethers, dinners, or even movie evenings. Occasionally, living apart might even spark a little excitement in your friendships, enhancing the value of the time you spend together.
Recall that college life is dynamic and that connections are frequently made in unexpected ways. Over time, it's possible that your bonds with the other two housemates deepen or that you forge other bonds that are just as meaningful.
Everything is a part of the journey, and you're not the only one who thinks this way. Please don't hesitate to get in touch if you need to discuss or expand on your experience. This is something you can handle!
I hope this is helpful.
Kind regards,
Mrunali Kalbhor,
University of Sunderland Student ambassador

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