The Student Room Group

boyfriend’s gay bestie getting a little too much

ok so i don't want to sound rude or anything but like i was dating this guy who has a gay bestie who was also my friend when we met in college that's where I got to know that he had a huge crush on my boyfriend and now they are bestfriends. The thing is all of that is okay, but when i started spending more time with my boyfriend i used to see his gay bestie doing chores, he used to tie his lace, make food for him, did his laundry, paid his bills, he did everything like everything. And my bf was okay with it.
When i had a conversation with him for it that it doesn't seem right like you should do your own things instead of being dependent on the other. He understood and also at the same time denied. But i also told him, which i believed that he is blindly in love with him hence he's doing so many things for you all at once. I got that vibe from him.
My bf denied and said "we are brothers" but then i asked him if his other 'male' friends do all of these things? He said no. I personally feel that his gay bestie creates a lot of problems between us as well, as i know him he loves drama. I remember the time his gay bestie was so drunk at my place and my bf was worried for him as if they are dating. Because when i drunk and emotional he just left me on the streets at 2am. Like I just don't get it? What is all this? I am a lot confused. When I tried talking about it, he gets angry and changes the topic. So is this all normal?
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tbh I don’t think it’s normal.

I think you and I both know the “gay bestie” has a crush on your bf but what’s concerning is that your bf may unconsciously like him back?
I only think this because you said “when i was drunk and emotional he just left me on the streets at 2am” which shows disparities in the way he treats the both of you. also, the hostility towards the topic is questionable too. even if he didn’t have a crush on the gay bestie, I’d be disappointed at the lack of care towards you.

that being said, I don’t know him personally so you’d have more insight into this than me, but I would definitely look into this if I were you.

hope it all works out!
No not normal, as you say almost certain his friend has feelings here and your boyfriend is just letting it all happen.

Like typing someone's laces and doing their laundry are pretty intimate things.

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