Does a partner&#x27;s sexual past matter?

why are guys so bothered?

Reply 82

TK

magiccarpet

why are guys so bothered?

maybe coz girls half EXPECT guys to have slept around but guys don't necessarily expect it of girls. that might be a bit of a generalisation :p:

Reply 83

surely guys must have slept with girls so the numbers of people of each sex sleeping together must be equal?

Reply 84

Ericz

This is my reply:

Guyy: I would be bothered if my girlfriend had slept with a lot of guys in the past

Why?

It will be a good indicator of what she will be like in the future. It is hard for a leopard to change its spots. If she can do it once (bearing in mind it is not just once, but a lot of guys), she can do it twice and as many times as possible.

I don't like being betrayed in a relationship. I certainly do not think that I can trust this type of girls.

And I felt dirty.

Note: Guys, ignore me if you are having a relationship with this type of girls now. Maybe it is just me. Since you have started a relationship, although she does it in the past, just make sure she does not do it when she is with you, otherwise, don't be blinded by love. Good face, good body ain't everything. It is the character of the girl that is more important.

Reply 85

SamTheMan

OP

17

Maybe I'm a bastard but the only issue isn't that she might cheat on me. It's the whole idea of how she sees sex and how she values it. I'd be upset by the idea that quite a lot of guys, some probably huge assholes, had already been intimate with her, guys that maybe didn't deserve to. It's probably part of a whole possessive thing. But what can you do? Feelings are feelings. What I'm describing is not something logical at all.

Reply 86

Ericz

Sam, no, as a guy, I understand and empathise with your feelings. It is not illogical at all. It is a common phenomenal in guys, just that few has the courage of admitting it like you.

Chinese has a saying, "Nobody likes to wear worn shoes". I guess it best describes your feelings.

A piece of advice for you, get to know her more. Her character and personality is more important than her looks and figure. She might be the type that trusts people too easily and has been cheated by those jerks. But them again, don't be blinded by love. If she really does not have a good personality or character, accept it, do not find excuses for her.

Reply 87

veryjammy

Ericz

This is my reply:

Guyy: I would be bothered if my girlfriend had slept with a lot of guys in the past

Why?

It will be a good indicator of what she will be like in the future. It is hard for a leopard to change its spots. If she can do it once (bearing in mind it is not just once, but a lot of guys), she can do it twice and as many times as possible.

I don't like being betrayed in a relationship. I certainly do not think that I can trust this type of girls.

And I felt dirty.

Note: Guys, ignore me if you are having a relationship with this type of girls now. Maybe it is just me. Since you have started a relationship, although she does it in the past, just make sure she does not do it when she is with you, otherwise, don't be blinded by love. Good face, good body ain't everything. It is the character of the girl that is more important.

Absolute bull. If she's slept with a lot of guys between relationships thats no indication of how she'll behave when in a relationship. there seems to be an equation on here between lots of sexual partners and lack of faithfulness and thats rubbish

Reply 88

Ericz

veryjammy

Absolute bull. If she's slept with a lot of guys between relationships thats no indication of how she'll behave when in a relationship. there seems to be an equation on here between lots of sexual partners and lack of faithfulness and thats rubbish

I cannot speak for the world but in my mind, I will be rather prejudiced against this type of girls. Of course, as friends, I am alright but as girlfriends, I do mind.

The link between lots of sexual partners and lack of faithfulness:

Of course, it depends on how young the girl is… if she is say 18 years old, I really don't expect her to have many sexual partners. It just goes to show that she can fall in love with anyone so easily and within such a short period of time, have sex with them. I feel that she is too easy-going or in a crude manner, loose.

She can do that to others in the past, she can probably do it to me now and also do it to others in the future.

I prefer girls who are slightly more conservative where sex is concerned.

Reply 89

puppy

veryjammy

Absolute bull. If she's slept with a lot of guys between relationships thats no indication of how she'll behave when in a relationship. there seems to be an equation on here between lots of sexual partners and lack of faithfulness and thats rubbish

Yay, you tell 'em. Us sluts can behave sometimes.

Reply 90

naivesincerity

puppy

Well put. As far as I'm concerned you're with someone for who they are at that time, not for who they were in the past. I think it's awfully judgemental to take the attitude that someone's past determines their future, that's not at all fair.

Thats exactly what i was saying before..we might have to both have tests to make sure to each other that were clear..but i wouldnty ask some one every detail of their past sex life, its not my business, just as i may not wanna tell them everything

Reply 91

yea but what eric is saying, that a girl must have had few partenrs to prove she is faithful surely should apply to guys as well?

according to him, as a girl, if i meet a guy who's had alot of partners, he is unlikely to ba faithful. so, why should i allow that yet a girl who's a ho and therefore likely to be unfaithful should not be tolerated by men?

Reply 92

SamTheMan

OP

17

naivesincerity

Thats exactly what i was saying before..we might have to both have tests to make sure to each other that were clear..but i wouldnty ask some one every detail of their past sex life, its not my business, just as i may not wanna tell them everything

It's so easy to say that your past sex life is noone's business but when you're totally crazy about someone, trust me, that really doesn't apply. You're only establishing a wall against honesty and sincerity. Knowing someone's sexual past is part of knowing them, just as you might want to know what they were like when they were younger, who their friends were.

The only reason you're saying that is because you wish that guys didn't care about your sexual past. It's a bit easy to just behave as you like and think that one day, you can wake up and decide everyone must consider you differently. No, what's more likely, is that you'll have to gain the guy's trust. If you want to get close to someone, you're going to have to accept that the guy might want to know and that he's likely to have issues. He might not see sex the way you do. Let him have his own opinion and morals.

Reply 93