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Disliked because my parents help me financially

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Why is it such a problem in university though? When I go to uni with the higher fees if my parents are willing to help me out then why should I feel guilty about that? I'm not going to live off them for the rest of my life but I think it would be silly to start out my working life already in loads of debt if I didn't have to.

I think the issue is more if someone is appreciative of the help they're getting. For example, my parents help me out but I'm incredibly grateful and would very much like to pay them it back, whenever I can afford it. Most parents would happily pay as much as they can towards their childrens' education, but that doesn't mean that it's not a sacrifice for them that any child should be thankful for.

That's how I see it, anyway :smile:

Reply 21

Anonymous #1

Original post by WelshBluebird

1 - You are VERY lucky to be born into a family like that. I hope you realise that.
2 - Why can't you get tuition fee loans for the next 2 years?
3 - Surely you can see why they would feel contempt to you? For whatever reasons you have needed money, and your parents have been able to provide that. For the people you are described, that probably was never the case. Their parents probably are never able to help them out with money at all.

What if they were able to receieve help, but they were such a dickhead and resented their parents, left home, stereotypical mummy/daddy issues from a teenager?

Some people also just like to be at the bottom and shout insults at those higher up. Think goth who is actually from an upper middle class background. I am not saying they all come from poor backgrounds.

Reply 22

WelshBluebird

Original post by Anonymous

It depends on the reasons then really. Some people have valid reasons for resenting their parents.

And I agree with you on the last point.

Reply 23

innerhollow

Original post by Studentus-anonymous

I dislike people who get helped by their parents and happily live off them.

Earning your own way while parents help with their income is fine.

The way that student finance is run basically forces wealthier parents to help out their children.

Also, I hate this notion that getting a job during university should be an expectation..Why? Why can't we focus on our education like we're supposed to. It's called "full-time" education for a reason. Not to mention that for certain degrees (i.e. Architecture, Medicine, Engineering) the workload intensity is such that trying to work a job on top of your studies is highly detrimental. For god's sakes, Oxbridge basically forbid their students from working!

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 24

Anonymous #1

I also have grown up with and hang out with people in my better off situation. I see through a lot of the bull**** and stuck up people, I meet plenty of them, and I call them out about it openly in public.

Think of the stereotypical spoiled brat on facebook whinging about their life being hard because they got grounded. Yes, I'm serious.

Reply 25

Josh_Dey

My Mother earns 10k a year.

Am I moaning?

Reply 26

Anonymous #1

Original post by Josh_Dey

My Mother earns 10k a year.

Am I moaning?

Would you resent someone JUST because you are aware of what their parents help them out with? Rhetorical btw

Reply 27

Josh_Dey

Original post by Anonymous

Would you resent someone JUST because you are aware of what their parents help them out with? Rhetorical btw

Although it's 'rhetorical' I'm still going to answer it.

No, I wouldn't give a damn. Now stop moaning.

Reply 28

Harrifer

Original post by Anonymous

So sometimes I feel people will talk about me behind my back because they can help me financially more than others..... parents income was just under£70k before recession, lucky to get much over £55k now.

I've had part time job through first 2 years of HE and I only asked for money when I was stuck, which I paid back. I won't get next 2 years tuition loan now, and my parents will pay it for me, it's necessary but they don't just hand out blank cheques.

But the most ironic thing about ANYONE who I feel contempt from.

They are going to university in the hope that one day they can do the same for their kids.

Why would you discuss your finances with people?

It's not polite, you know.

Reply 29

llys

If people really dislike you, that is most probably due to your personality, rather than anything else.

Sorry to be blunt, but it is true. You can make up lots of reasons in your mind so as to not have to face it, but this is the most probable reason.

Reply 30

ElfManiac

I don't care where people get their money from, as long as they don't rub it in that they have more than I do. While I have a job, and am working and earning, I have as much if not more disposable income as anyone else I know at uni. I admit though I have been lucky in that I worked through sixth form and first and most of second year, and in the last summer vacation full-time, so I haven't particularly struggled financially. If I hadn't had my job, I think I would be a lot more resentful towards anybody that has money given to them...not because of where they got it, but just because they have it and I don't.

Reply 31

faber niger

So why do you tell anyone? If no one knows, they can't attack you.

Reply 32

chrislpp

It seems discussing finances when you are doing ok is rude? But many people are allowed to take pride that they earn less? Ok.

Reply 33

BenjyK

People probably dislike you because of how you come across with your money, and not the fact that you have it. It may not seem fair to you, it really can come across quite bad when you talk about the amount of money you get from your parents when many are only just scraping through university. Just saying, think before you say/do things

Reply 34

salty_candy

Original post by chrislpp

It seems discussing finances when you are doing ok is rude? But many people are allowed to take pride that they earn less? Ok.

I don't think anyone's taking pride in earning less, it makse sense. There's no need to discuss finances when you're doing well, so it seems a bit like showing off and is rude, but having money troubles can be upsetting and people generally talk to their friends about their problems.

Reply 35

Anonymous #1

Original post by BenjyK

What if they COULD be in a better situation if they didn't spend at least 3 nights a week drinking. I have never spoke about it, it's pretty obvious, I only tell best friends about stuff like this.

Reply 36

LiberiFatali

Original post by jismith1989

So why do you tell anyone? If no one knows, they can't attack you.

Was wondering this. It's no ones business if your parents help you out or not.

Also I don't see the big deal if they do. In the future if I have the cash to help my kids through University, then I'll gladly write out those cheques. :confused:

(edited 13 years ago)

Reply 37

Anonymous #1

Original post by LiberiFatali

Was wondering this. It's no ones goddamn business if your parents help you out or not.

Also, don't see the big deal anyway, if I have the cash to help my kids through University, then I'll gladly write out those cheques. :confused:

I have never actually said ''I'm quite well off so my parents give me money'' to anyone

Reply 38

tehFrance

Original post by Anonymous

parents income was just under£70k before recession, lucky to get much over £55k now.

People are jealous because your parents earn £55k (which is pretty average isn't it? unless it is after tax)and help you out every now and again? jeez, I'd hate to think what people will think of how much my dad will help me out when I'm in uni :s-smilie:

Reply 39

Elissabeth

I've got a friend who is soooooo bad in that way. She's not a student though.

Her parents have a lot of money and property. She left school with 7 mediocre GCSE's, after a year went back to our old school's sixth form, stayed for one term and left without taking any exams after falling out with the teachers. Since then, she has 'worked' in one of their businesses, but she basically does nothing, she's always on facebook, she gets a reasonable salary for this. Her and her boyfriend live in one of her parents houses, they only pay £200 a month rent between them, this is for a two bed house in London!

She goes on holiday all the time, is so lazy, doesn't drive because she 'can't be bothered to learn', even though she could get that paid for.

If anyone ever says anything to her about it, she says 'I work hard for my money, so why should I feel guilty about it?'.