I'm Wonderful and I'm Single Society XIX

i compressed it as a zip only decreased it by 20mb, it was filmed as a .mp4 file so ... anyway i'm off to bed

i compressed it as a zip only decreased it by 20mb, it was filmed as a .mp4 file so ... anyway i'm off to bed

Yeah, that's what I meant by it being a good option for a lot of people who don't want too/can't go down the usual uni route! Yeah, obviously staying here wouldn't be the end of the world because I get my maintenance loan anyway and obviously I know my way round here so if I didn't like many people on my course, it wouldn't be the end of the world like it would away if yano what I mean? But then, on the other hand, I feel like I'd become waaay more independent if I moved away and I sort of want the 'typical' uni lifestyle (minus the ridiculous drinking, I don't drink aha).
Yeah, and even if people's parents didn't have to scrape the money together like ours, it doesn't mean that they want to spend it on their children going to uni. I know a person whose parents have a lot of money but her parents like to go on three holidays per year and aren't that happy about having to pay for her uni accommodation and living costs so I think it should be equal!
I HATE needy friends. I have this one friend who is soooooo needy and it drives me up the wall. I'm trying hard to distance myself a bit, which is working so far, but I need an excuse to get out of going to see a comedy show with him because it'll be really awkward! I like to be alone quite a bit of the time and I like my own space so friends who always wanna go somewhere or do something get on my nerves. I just feel like they aren't comfortable with themselves so don't want to be alone!
I feel like we have the same teacher hahah. My psych teacher is the best teacher I have ever had. She's helping me edit my personal statement and everything!
I don't know exactly when I developed anxiety, depression, emetophobia/contamination ocd tendencies but when I think about it, I've had them all at varying degrees since I was about 12 without actually realising. Mine got so bad December 2011-September 2012 that I can't even remember that summer. I think I left the house about eight times in three months, most of those were for exams as well!
Hm, that's interesting about the new years thing (that sounds a bit horrible saying it's interesting but I don't mean it like that!), can't say i've ever experienced it!
I work well under pressure, I think I do anyway, but sometimes the amount of homework and the high expectations from myself and my teachers become far too much. The amount of times I've nearly broken down in class from feeling overwhelmed is ridiculous. I don't really feel comfortable talking to my teachers about this stuff though, particularly as I don't have a formal diagnosis, so idk, I'll have to cope somehow haha! Yeah I hate when it's all going so well and then just crashes back to rock bottom. It's almost as if you can't be happy and anxiety free, like it won't let you leave and so has to make you feel **** when you're doing well!

I feel like I am actually reading my own story. Are you sure we aren't twins? hahaha
Yeah it actually is very good. I have to stay at home for open uni which sucks a bit. I would've loved to get out, gone to a campus uni and enjoyed the lifestyle as well. Uni of kent which is the only place I wanted to go to had a cinema and lovely bar (I don't drink but it seemed like a nice place to go to chat with friends and stuff). I just want some independence too. But I am going to work a job alongside my uni degree, so I can save some money and hopefully rent my own place somewhere eventually.
I know unis seem to think that parents just throw money at their kids but they don't! My auntie and uncle are paying for their kids accommodation, but they themselves have to pay off the course debts. They're not happy, especially since their kids seem to waste lots of the money and they don't have that much money.
Wow I actually hate needy friends so badly. I never go anywhere with my friends, and I like that fact. I had this needy friend. She used to force me to go out every weekend. If it weren't her house it was the cinema or the park or something else, and it always cost me so much money. Eventually I just started making up excuses and we stopped being friends - I was sooooo glad.
hahaha so do I. I'm not doing a personal statement, but mine helped me to get my maths a-level sorted - she literally wouldn't stop until I got what I needed. She was brilliant.
I kind of know when it started, though I had had bits of it before then, due to people not being that nice and everything. I'd get down. I think I had some issues when I was in yer 7, but nothing terrible, and I managed to recover, until a couple of years later. I had one really bad period for like 2 months. My mum thought I was seriously sick, I couldn't eat, sleep or think about anything. I just hated life so badly. I developed OCD when I was younger - over being clean, then it went and now I'm not too fussed about being super clean (I'm still clean in a more normal way though). But I have the real obsessive types now - I worry about the little things and I obsess over them terribly. I also have obsessive doubting and I like to plan everything. I have SAD too, but I have the type where I get depressed and down in the summer - and it is true. It's horrible because I tend to feel down for the whole holidays which is horrible. I literally feel so happy when the cold weather roles in, which I know is weird, but I just don't like the summer at all. I love the really cold weather, when the wind is painfully icy, when it's snowing, raining, thunderstorming etc. So naturally my depression will lift more now anyway.
Haha that's ok. No I know it's weird. I literally have a breakdown every new year, despite trying to remain happy. I tried and tried every year, but I just get overwhelmed. I feel like so many good things happen I don't want to let go of the year before, and I'm too afraid to know what a whole new year will bring, so I just end up having terrible anxiety over it all.
I like a bit of pressure, but too much and I just can't handle it. My teachers know this so they lay off. I don't even talk to my friends about it! I've never had any diagnosis either, but I think you just know when things aren't quite right. I am determined not to let it happen this time, and for like 3 days I've been good now. I count that as good. and it's been 2 weeks since I had any panic attacks, which I am pleased about. I have gone 4 weeks max without one, and i'd like to go 5 weeks without one really.

Mothers on one already and we've only been in car five minutes. Apparently it's me whose been complaining about this open day when all I've done is sat here and eat toast which ofc turns into insults about my weight. Why does she play the victim and not see that it's her who's been ****ing argumentative and complaining about everything ugh. Be much less hassle if only my dad took me!

University move in day!

Good luck!!!

Thank you Jack hope you're doing good!

Im ok thanks - could be better though

University move in day!

Aw home come?

I would thank Spiral if he were here!

Some nights the thread used to go quiet. Used to be Friday/Saturday nights. Apparently, I'm the only one who didn't have a life those nights

I had to watch GI Joe last night