i thought i had overcome my problem...

what's the structure?

Reply 2

OP

Original post by tehforum

what's the structure?

we are looking for 8 syllables to rhyme with Crete and feet...

Reply 3

tehforum

Original post by the bear

we are looking for 8 syllables to rhyme with Crete and feet...

she replied they make her complete

Reply 4

OP

Original post by tehforum

she replied they make her complete

this is good !!

actually it would sound better as

"she replied that they made her complete"

:congrats:

Reply 5

Piko_Piko

14

The rhythm's all off.
Give it up - it's a lost cause.

Reply 6

Jam'

15

She said she couldn't afford veet (hair removal cream)

Or

She simply ran out of all her veet

Or

She told of the steep price of veet

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 7

OP

Original post by Jam'

She said she couldn't afford veet (hair removal cream)

yes that has legs...

:adore:

Reply 8

OP

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
she said it was just a conceit

Reply 9

Piko_Piko

14

Original post by the bear

yes that has legs...

:adore:

Read out loud, the emphasis would be on the "n't".

It sounds godawful.

Reply 10

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
said yes, and her life was now complete

Reply 11

OP

Original post by Piko_Piko

Read out loud, the emphasis would be on the "n't".

It sounds godawful.

it does need some work, but the idea of using postage stamps to remove foot hair is excellent.

maybe

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
she said it was instead of veet

Reply 12

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
said someone had spiked her cake and tea

Reply 13

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
said yes, and it is a jolly treat

Reply 14

Original post by the bear

it does need some work, but the idea of using postage stamps to remove foot hair is excellent.

maybe

there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
she said it was instead of veet

Or better still:
there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
said (in the dark of her bedroom) she'd mistaken it for veet

Reply 15

OP

Original post by the butter

Or better still:
there was a young lady from Crete
who stuck postage stamps on her feet;
when asked by her friend
if she'd gone round the bend
said (in the dark of her bedroom) she'd mistaken it for veet

the previous one was better methinks

Reply 16

Original post by the bear

the previous one was better methinks

Yus yus, by all means it rhymed well and went smoothly, but she'd still have gone around the bend if she used stamps in lieu of Veet. She must have picked it up by mistake if she is to be sane, don't you think?

Reply 17

OP