How do girls feel about being approached in the street?

That's understandable. But again, if you refuse and you both go your separate ways, would you go home and say 'I was harassed by a random guy today'? That's what I'm getting at. cole-slaw refuses to acknowledge this, when this is not any different from approaching someone at the bar or club. Even with the social expectations, by his logic, you could still be guilty of harassment.

But even if a guy took rejection well and we both went our separate ways, the girl was still put in that really uncomfortable (and quite frankly terrifying) position. I think trying to interact with strangers is best done in social environments like bars and clubs where people expect people to approach them. Approaching someone on the street just has a completely different tone, especially if you're alone. It's also pretty rude if the girl is on her way someone and a guy has just completely interrupted her.

I'm not saying that you wouldn't be uncomfortable, you have that right. But all I'm asking, is if you would call it harassment. And how do you define a social environment? The street could fit that definition. Although I agree with in the sense that a bar or club is the best scenario to approach someone but it's not a hard and fast rule. As for being rude, that just depends on girl. Some girls might be flattered and give you the time of day. If the girl feels the guy is being rude, she'll be clear about.

Even if some girls are flattered, a majority would be uncomfortable and scared, so you'd be putting a girl through a really unpleasant experience on the off chance that she might be flattered.

With regards to a girl making it clear that she's uncomfortable, some might be too scared to do so for fear of the guys reaction. Even if the guy has perfectly good intentions and remains respectable, the possibility that he might get aggressive or confrontational will always be in her head. It's not a pleasant position to put someone in.

Every woman who has posted on this thread, you have quoted and basically told her she's wrong, she doesn't know what she's talking about, her opinions and invalid and don't matter.

You're a dreadful misogynist, actively trying to silence women and prevent them from talking up against sexual harassment. You need to seek professional help.

Even if some girls are flattered, a majority would be uncomfortable and scared, so you'd be putting a girl through a really unpleasant experience on the off chance that she might be flattered.

With regards to a girl making it clear that she's uncomfortable, some might be too scared to do so for fear of the guys reaction. Even if the guy has perfectly good intentions and remains respectable, the possibility that he might get aggressive or confrontational will always be in her head. It's not a pleasant position to put someone in.

Well said.

I think, finally, this thread has come to the correct conclusion, in that both main protagonists (miser and ade9000) appear to be beginning to see the error of their ways and admit the validity of our arguments. This is natural, it would be worrying if they were to continue to wish to harass women even after being confronted with the evidence of the effect this has.


There will always be misogynistic trolls, lets make sure that we combat them with reasonable debate and that common sense always prevails.

Everything you've said in this thread makes you seem like a bit of a tool to be completely frank. According to you no human being should engage in conversing a fellow member of their species in a public area unless it is for a purely utilitarian purpose. The fact that you've misconstrued complimenting a female on her appearance with harassment really goes a long way to portraying yourself as slightly mentally ill. In fact, I would say that this kind of warped and bastardised conduct is exactly what is wrong with the world we live in. It's this kind of culture of fearmongering which is why no one speaks to anyone in public. Everyone is assumed to be a murder, rapist and/or terrorist. You're guilty until proven innocent - except you have no opportunity to prove your innocence because you shouldn't be talking to other people according to you!

Even if some girls are flattered, a majority would be uncomfortable and scared, so you'd be putting a girl through a really unpleasant experience on the off chance that she might be flattered.

With regards to a girl making it clear that she's uncomfortable, some might be too scared to do so for fear of the guys reaction. Even if the guy has perfectly good intentions and remains respectable, the possibility that he might get aggressive or confrontational will always be in her head. It's not a pleasant position to put someone in.

To an extent, the only reason people feel uncomfortable is because people are encouraged not to do it. If it were a more common occurrence, it'd be less unusual and less of a big deal. The attitude cole-slaw has been promoting is of wanting members of a society to become more and more insular until nobody has any chance of making any other member of society uncomfortable, but by doing so is actually perpetuating these feelings of discomfort by encouraging us to have a society in which people are vulnerable to it.

It's advocating some kind of bubble-wrap existence which won't do us any good in the long run. The more people don't talk to each other the more we will become uncomfortable with it. That's not a good thing. The current scenario seems to be that the women in this thread who dread it dread it because people have abused the interaction - this skews things up because it takes ludicrous self-confidence to stick two fingers up to this solipsistic ideology people like cole-slaw are promoting, and a lot of people with that amount of confidence have it because they don't give a crap about anyone other than themselves. If not for this ideology, the majority of interactions would be between normal people who don't carry absurd expectations of women or become mental when another person bruises their ego.

People shouldn't be expected to be anti-social - that's stupid. Is it any wonder people have self-esteem and image issues when there are people going around promoting the idea that giving someone a compliment is illegal? It's bananas. If you have something positive to say I think a person should say it. Haters gonna hate.

you concluded that all forms of street conversation was harassment

Will you PLEASE stop conflating people talking to each other with people making uninvited sexual passes at strangers. As I have said repeatedly, one is acceptable, one is sexual harassment.

You can make an elaborate argument about how its important that people should talk to each other, but as no-one here has contradicted that, you're knocking down strawmen.

You're a moderator, you should know better than to derail threads with ridiculous strawmen arguments.

I don't see how this is even a discussion. If there is even a small chance that your actions might cause someone distress, you'd have to be a thoughtless prick to go through with it.

Sorry what was that?

Another strawman. I have never said that, in fact I have repeatedly said the opposite.

Nothing there is contradictory...

I don't see how this is even a discussion. If there is even a small chance that your actions might cause someone distress, you'd have to be a thoughtless prick to go through with it.

The attitude cole-slaw has been promoting is of wanting members of a society to become more and more insular until nobody has any chance of making any other member of society uncomfortable, but by doing so is actually perpetuating these feelings of discomfort by encouraging us to have a society in which people are vulnerable to it.