I think i creeped a girl out

Original post by Anonymous

I feel like ive creeped a girl out. Ive known her a long time - were not really close friends but we are familiar. Next time i see her should i ask her whats wrong or act like normal?

If you've indeed "creeped her out", then there's pretty much nothing you can do to rectify this. Just keep contact to a minimal and be civil, gauge her reactions towards you and go from there. If she's keeping her distance, maybe she'll come around in her own time (if, say it was a misunderstanding on her part). If you feel it's really awkward, and you wanted to clear the air, you may be better off going through a mutual friend and have them fight your corner.

From my experience, once you've entered "The Creep Zone", there's pretty much game over. If she was just a mate, you stand a chance of recovering... but if she's someone you fancied, I'd say forget it. Obviously take any lessons learnt from this so you don't make the same mistake.

Reply 2

OP

Original post by Old Skool Freak

If you've indeed "creeped her out", then there's pretty much nothing you can do to rectify this. Just keep contact to a minimal and be civil, gauge her reactions towards you and go from there. If she's keeping her distance, maybe she'll come around in her own time (if, say it was a misunderstanding on her part). If you feel it's really awkward, and you wanted to clear the air, you may be better off going through a mutual friend and have them fight your corner.

From my experience, once you've entered "The Creep Zone", there's pretty much game over. If she was just a mate, you stand a chance of recovering... but if she's someone you fancied, I'd say forget it. Obviously take any lessons learnt from this so you don't make the same mistake.

I guess i fancied her but at the same time ive known her for ages. I see her every day

Reply 3

Original post by Anonymous

I guess i fancied her but at the same time ive known her for ages. I see her every day

Doesn't make any difference if you're officially in "The Creep Zone". Given time, she may come around or get over it in her own time... but any conscious attempt by you to smooth things over is only likely to push her further away.

Reply 4

OP

Original post by Old Skool Freak

Doesn't make any difference if you're officially in "The Creep Zone". Given time, she may come around or get over it in her own time... but any conscious attempt by you to smooth things over is only likely to push her further away.

Whats the harm in saying to a girl 'have I done something to upset you'. Just treat her like a normal person or I can just keep interacting with her the way I have been and act like nothing happened and hopefully she moves past it if she is creeped out.

Reply 5

Original post by Anonymous

Whats the harm in saying to a girl 'have I done something to upset you'. Just treat her like a normal person or I can just keep interacting with her the way I have been and act like nothing happened and hopefully she moves past it if she is creeped out.

Girls will never directly tell you what you've done wrong... however, they'll still sulk and act p****d off with you.

As I said, you'd be best off finding out how the cards are stacked by going through a mutual friend. By all means, you can ask them if she's upset with you and they'll be in a much better position to advise you on what to do than anyone on here (after all, we don't know you, her or the background; you've not said what you may or may not have done; etc.).

In absence of a mutual friend, keep contact minimal between you, and gauge how she reacts when she sees you, and go from there.

If she's "creeped out" by you, it's different (and more complicated) than if she's just generally annoyed with you.

(edited 7 months ago)

Don't play ignorant. If you think you've said or done something that didn't come across well then apologise for it. Something like: "By the way, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable when I said/did X [yesterday/last week]."

She might say thank you (meaning, yes, you did creep her out and she's glad you've acknowledged it) or she might say it didn't bother her or not to worry about it. She might want to discuss it; she might not. If she changes or drops the subject you should do so too.

Reply 7

OP

Original post by 1582

Don't play ignorant. If you think you've said or done something that didn't come across well then apologise for it. Something like: "By the way, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable when I said/did X [yesterday/last week]."

She might say thank you (meaning, yes, you did creep her out and she's glad you've acknowledged it) or she might say it didn't bother her or not to worry about it. She might want to discuss it; she might not. If she changes or drops the subject you should do so too.

I feel like I might have given her too much attention but at the same time shes the one who made the first move.

Original post by Anonymous

I feel like I might have given her too much attention but at the same time shes the one who made the first move.

Then "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable the other day" will work just fine.

Reply 9

OP

Original post by 1582

Then "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable the other day" will work just fine.

But i havnt said or done anything. The last time i interacted with her she was walking in front of me and i called her asked how she is and that i havnt seen her in a while. She was polite and friendly. So i dont know what it is. Im thinking just keep interacting with her the way i do

Reply 10

Surnia

Original post by Anonymous

But i havnt said or done anything. The last time i interacted with her she was walking in front of me and i called her asked how she is and that i havnt seen her in a while. She was polite and friendly. So i dont know what it is. Im thinking just keep interacting with her the way i do

Then why do you think there's a problem and what did she do first?

Reply 11

Doomotron

18

What did you actually do to creep her out?

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

Yea you should always respect others feeling and should know what’s bothering her but in nice way

Original post by Anonymous

I feel like ive creeped a girl out. Ive known her a long time - were not really close friends but we are familiar. Next time i see her should i ask her whats wrong or act like normal?

Reply 13

Original post by 1582

Don't play ignorant. If you think you've said or done something that didn't come across well then apologise for it. Something like: "By the way, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable when I said/did X [yesterday/last week]."

She might say thank you (meaning, yes, you did creep her out and she's glad you've acknowledged it) or she might say it didn't bother her or not to worry about it. She might want to discuss it; she might not. If she changes or drops the subject you should do so too.

I would agree with this, if she was just annoyed / p*****d off (in general) with him... but (from my experience/ observation, at least) When a girl is "creeped-out" by a guy, she doesn't want to know the guy at all. Hearing his voice or being anywhere near him will make her skin crawl.

That's why I suggested going through a friend.

Reply 14

OP

Original post by Old Skool Freak

I would agree with this, if she was just annoyed / p*****d off (in general) with him... but (from my experience/ observation, at least) When a girl is "creeped-out" by a guy, she doesn't want to know the guy at all. Hearing his voice or being anywhere near him will make her skin crawl.

That's why I suggested going through a friend.

I dont know any friends. We walk the same route to walk...next time i see her ill just approach her and ask her if everything is ok...she will orobs say yes. Ill ask if ive done anything wrong and apologise. Simple

Reply 15

Original post by Anonymous

I dont know any friends. We walk the same route to walk...next time i see her ill just approach her and ask her if everything is ok...she will orobs say yes. Ill ask if ive done anything wrong and apologise. Simple

Guess that's all you can do... and you've got nothing to lose. The worst she can do is ignore you or tell you (in no uncertain terms) to get lost.

If she doesn't wan to know though, just respect her wishes and go your separate ways (I'm speaking both metaphorically and literally).

Reply 16

paigec21

2

What exactly did you do or say that creeped her out? Or when did you notice she was starting to keep her distance?

Reply 17

OP

Original post by paigec21

What exactly did you do or say that creeped her out? Or when did you notice she was starting to keep her distance?

I think ive been giving her a lot of sttebtion. Shes not really keeping her distance ...its more like shes stopped smiling everytime she sees me. So how best to approach this? If i ask her if everuthing is ok she will say yes as shes very polite. How can i respond to make it less awkward?

Reply 18