The Student Room Group

Approaching a guy who is very popular

There is a guy in my college class who I have always wanted to approach, but I have hesitated a lot to do that, since he is popular to a concerning degree;
he is essentially a "doll" in the eyes of all other girls - he is 6'8 with an imposing build and a pretty face, and a lot of girls at my school like that type of look - so he always gets approached and hit on by girls, and he is just standing there, and responding a little bit to the girls who talk the most to him.
They often try to be in the same groups as him, and act generally flirty around him whenever they can, and it looks as if he enjoys that attention, but he takes very little intiative himself.
Is there something that I should keep in mind if I try approaching a boy like him, and how might he have been affected by the other girls' constant signs of interest?
Reply 1
Morning Emma .
Approaching someone who receives a lot of attention can be intimidating, but remember that everyone appreciates genuine interest. Keep in mind that he may be used to superficial interactions, so showing genuine curiosity about him as a person could set you apart. Also, consider that he might appreciate someone who treats him as more than just a "doll" and values him for who he is beyond his physical appearance. As for the other girls' constant attention, it's possible he enjoys it but may also appreciate a break from it or crave deeper connections. Ultimately, just be yourself and approach him with kindness and sincerity. He’ll be lucky too !
Reply 2
Original post by Fire away
Morning Emma .
Approaching someone who receives a lot of attention can be intimidating, but remember that everyone appreciates genuine interest. Keep in mind that he may be used to superficial interactions, so showing genuine curiosity about him as a person could set you apart. Also, consider that he might appreciate someone who treats him as more than just a "doll" and values him for who he is beyond his physical appearance. As for the other girls' constant attention, it's possible he enjoys it but may also appreciate a break from it or crave deeper connections. Ultimately, just be yourself and approach him with kindness and sincerity. He’ll be lucky too !

Thanks, I guess I am a bit worried that it will be problematic to keep him if I do end up dating him.
Even the most popular and picky girls at my school seem to pretty much put him on a pedestal, so he has date invitations thrown over him quite regularly as far as I can tell, but I haven't really heard him give clear answers, except smile and look flattered by them.
I know that he has been together with girls though, since a guy who knows him has told me that he used to date girls quite frequently before he started college here.
But I guess I will try smiling at him and looking at him a bit, and see how he reacts.
(edited 3 months ago)
Original post by Emma0404
There is a guy in my college class who I have always wanted to approach, but I have hesitated a lot to do that, since he is popular to a concerning degree;
he is essentially a "doll" in the eyes of all other girls - he is 6'8 with an imposing build and a pretty face, and a lot of girls at my school like that type of look - so he always gets approached and hit on by girls, and he is just standing there, and responding a little bit to the girls who talk the most to him.
They often try to be in the same groups as him, and act generally flirty around him whenever they can, and it looks as if he enjoys that attention, but he takes very little intiative himself.
Is there something that I should keep in mind if I try approaching a boy like him, and how might he have been affected by the other girls' constant signs of interest?
I think you should keep in mind that he talks to many girls at once, so don't be sad if he ever rejects you. I tried to say it in a nice way, sorry. But don't be afraid to shoot your shot. Maybe approach him by introducing yourself, and don't start flirting with him just yet. Ask him for his number or snap so you guys can talk over text, and then text him often so you guys become great friends. I heard that guys will fall for girls that are his best friend. Don't, whatever you do, don't go crazy for him and make yourself look desperate because to him every girl looks desperate for him, and you want to be on top of them. Maybe search up some ways to make a guy fall for you. (By the way, this is my best advice but idk if you should take it considering I'm barely in high school)
Reply 4
Original post by Emma0404
Thanks, I guess I am a bit worried that it will be problematic to keep him if I do end up dating him.
Even the most popular and picky girls at my school seem to pretty much put him on a pedestal, so he has date invitations thrown over him quite regularly as far as I can tell, but I haven't really heard him give clear answers, except smile and look flattered by them.
I know that he has been together with girls though, since a guy who knows him has told me that he used to date girls quite frequently before he started college here.
But I guess I will try smiling at him and looking at him a bit, and see how he reacts.
Smiling and looking at this guy makes you no different or better than any other girl.

As already suggested, just talk to him as a normal human being. You can't be something you're not and trying to put on a persona you think will appeal to him will be exhausting and you won't be able to keep it up if, say, you're not a naturally flirty person.
(edited 3 months ago)
Reply 5
Be independent and confident in your flirting and avoid simping. People with lots of choices are inevitably the most difficult to go out with. But if you’re light hearted about it, it can be fun anyway and who knows there might be something going
very shocking because 99 percent of women will never ever ever approach a guy!, no matter how much they like him or are attracted to him, and why do i get the feeling that will be the standard, norm, for all eternity.
Reply 7
I have made eye contact with him a few times, and smiled to him and said hi to him when I have passed him, but it feels a bit tricky;
earlier today I saw several girls stand around him and act flirty, and ask him if he would want to come to a party that they apparently are having this weekend.
I am not sure what they are planning there, but I guess I will have to be a bit extra active myself.
(edited 3 months ago)
Original post by Emma0404
There is a guy in my college class who I have always wanted to approach, but I have hesitated a lot to do that, since he is popular to a concerning degree;
he is essentially a "doll" in the eyes of all other girls - he is 6'8 with an imposing build and a pretty face, and a lot of girls at my school like that type of look - so he always gets approached and hit on by girls, and he is just standing there, and responding a little bit to the girls who talk the most to him.
They often try to be in the same groups as him, and act generally flirty around him whenever they can, and it looks as if he enjoys that attention, but he takes very little intiative himself.
Is there something that I should keep in mind if I try approaching a boy like him, and how might he have been affected by the other girls' constant signs of interest?
im a boy. but
from experience even tho im just grade 10
those girls that flirt with him are just playing around. trust me
be yourself. ig if he likes u then he will notice u. if u can, be in his group. if he gets annoyed or anything by the other girls maybe he will go to u
interesting because 99 percent of girls will never approach a guy

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