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Am I right to be angry at my friend?

I've been friends with this girl for over a year. When I make friends with people, especially if they're close, I am very loyal and always take them and their emotions into account. I've always sacrificed my own time to make her feel happier (especially when she repeated told me she wasn't settling at uni) and we gradually became close (I'm a girl btw). Anyways, I've found that every now and then she'll ignore me and it makes me feel completely disregarded. The other day she was talking to another girl on the course and the whole time she was there she acted like I didn't exist. She does this pretty frequently and has expressed in the past that she wants to make new friends. I understand that but idk if i'm overreacting over how I get treated because of it. I remember one time when I met up with her and she looked like she was feeling low and tired and that's how she acted with me, not really paying attention to what I was saying. Then we walk into a lecture and a girl on the course sits next to her and she acts like a different person,really happy and being really interested in what she has to say. Or when we sit together she'll look around like she's looking for someone else and when she finds someone she's spoken to before she'll go upto sit next to them and just leave me there. I know she wants more friends, but surely there's a better way to go about it? Or is this how everyone makes new friends?
Who knows? You could be left.
Reply 2
Damn Girl she shady
Reply 3
Go make your own friends since shes doing this to you , friends arent like that
Reply 4
wow idk anon, something like that would kind of piss me off, but then i'm p. possessive of my friends.
i don't mean to be harsh, but it could have been that she was friends with you at first bc you were there? not in a bad way, just that you know, two people who don't have friends make friends kind of way. what i mean is maybe you aren't very compatible, but since you've been really nice to her, she was still sticking around and being nice to you?
i don't mean to make her sound totally b*tchy btw, just that this could be a product of her trying to find friends she's more compatible with and phase you out without being awkward or (overly) rude about it. maybe she's hoping you'll get the hint and you'll go and try and find some other friends as well? or maybe she literally doesn't understand what she's doing and it's all a misunderstanding.
imho, i would give her some space, maybe try to make/hang with a few other friends yourself. if she's trying to get rid of you, then she'll be happier and probably won't try to interact with you at all. if she just needs some space then hopefully by the time you've been away from her for a few days, she'll be more willing to talk to you and stuff. but if it's a misunderstanding, then she'll come to you or she'll feel upset/abandoned (which seems horrible) but also means that you can actually talk to her about how you've been feeling too.
in any case, good luck anon.
p.t.
tldr ?
Reply 6
Original post by Anonymous
I've been friends with this girl for over a year. When I make friends with people, especially if they're close, I am very loyal and always take them and their emotions into account. I've always sacrificed my own time to make her feel happier (especially when she repeated told me she wasn't settling at uni) and we gradually became close (I'm a girl btw). Anyways, I've found that every now and then she'll ignore me and it makes me feel completely disregarded. The other day she was talking to another girl on the course and the whole time she was there she acted like I didn't exist. She does this pretty frequently and has expressed in the past that she wants to make new friends. I understand that but idk if i'm overreacting over how I get treated because of it. I remember one time when I met up with her and she looked like she was feeling low and tired and that's how she acted with me, not really paying attention to what I was saying. Then we walk into a lecture and a girl on the course sits next to her and she acts like a different person,really happy and being really interested in what she has to say. Or when we sit together she'll look around like she's looking for someone else and when she finds someone she's spoken to before she'll go upto sit next to them and just leave me there. I know she wants more friends, but surely there's a better way to go about it? Or is this how everyone makes new friends?


That sounds really frustrating. It's understandable how you feel especially because you are pouring out so much help and yet getting nothing in return. How you feel is completely your entitlement. She doesn't seem like a friend at all to be honest. If I was you I would back off from her slightly and gradually and start looking for new friends who will make you feel good and give you self-worth. Life is too short to let people not treat you right. Know your worth.

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