A-Levels are making me depressed and I don't know what to do

I just want someone to understand what I'm going through and give me some advice.
I'm doing Biology, Chemistry, and English Lit for A-Level. I'm having nervous breakdowns every week because of biology and chemistry. I feel like I can't handle these science A-Levels any longer. I hate them. I know people would probably ask why I chose them. I was forced into doing them for A-Level by my parents. All my life my parents have been forcing me to do things that I don't want to do just t make them happy. They want me to be a pharmacist, but I don't want to be. Their stupid excuse for it is that girls do really well at biology. They have been manipulating me since year 7. My parents have been telling me that if I don't study a science related course at uni, I won't get a good job. I believed them because I was (and still am) young and I just thought that they wanted the best for me. That's when I realised that they don't care about my well being.
Just this morning I told my mum how unhappy I was. She didn't even care. She just told me that satan was making me say all these things and if I don't do well I will bring shame to my family. Right now I feel alone and I don't know what to do. I feel like I have no one to talk to.
My passion is English Literature. It is my favourite subject. I want to study it at university because I have always loved it from a young age.
How do I get through another year of Biology and Chemistry when I hate them with a passion. I feel like a failure. How can I cope?

Reply 1

Svesh

18

This happened to my and I failed my as. My parents wanted me to become a doctor and I took Bio,chem, phys and maths. I had no motivation to work. But now I'm resitting and choose the subjects I want to do which is maths further maths and physics and I'm doing so much better and getting A/A* instead of Ds,Es and Us. This year is way more fun

Reply 2

username3521346

OP

3

Original post by aceplayyt

This happened to my and I failed my as. My parents wanted me to become a doctor and I took Bio,chem, phys and maths. I had no motivation to work. But now I'm resitting and choose the subjects I want to do which is maths further maths and physics and I'm doing so much better and getting A/A* instead of Ds,Es and Us. This year is way more fun

But I'm scared of what my parents would do to me if I fail. I don't want to retake AS because I'm scared that other people would make fun of me.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 3

Svesh

18

Original post by Deer Girl

But I'm scared of what my parents would do to me if I fail. I don't want to retake AS. I'm scared of what my parents would do to me.

Revise each topic then do Questions on each topic. You could probs finish doing that by easter. Then do every past paper in existence. You'll feel super ready after that. It's what doing now and what works best for me. Or try a see what works best for you.

Reply 4

username3521346

OP

3

Original post by aceplayyt

Revise each topic then do Questions on each topic. You could probs finish doing that by easter. Then do every past paper in existence. You'll feel super ready after that. It's what doing now and what works best for me. Or try a see what works best for you.

Thank you. Do you have any advice on what I should do if I feel like a failure?

Reply 5

username3482522

17

what a-level subjects would you rather do?

Reply 6

username3521346

OP

3

Original post by num.7

what a-level subjects would you rather do?

English Lit, Sociology and Geography.

Reply 7

username3482522

17

Original post by Deer Girl

English Lit, Sociology and Geography.

i would resit year 12 to do those a-levels.

your parents would disapprove and you would feel terrible for having to resit but it's your life - you can start living it or you can choose not to, end up depressed for the rest of your life, filled with regret and hate all the way up until you're on your death bed, contemplating on your past and asking yourself, "was it really worth it?". you only live once and if that's how you wish to spend the next 70 years of your time, so be it.

once you get your as-level results back and it's disappointing (who knows? you might decide to persevere through this and find a way to do well), then i would resit year 12 with those a-levels and explain the predicament you were in to your teachers. generally speaking, they're quite understanding so i'm sure you'll be fine.

(edited 6 years ago)

Reply 8

Svesh

18

Original post by Deer Girl

Thank you. Do you have any advice on what I should do if I feel like a failure?

I'm living by Work Hard, Play Hard all this year. Live and breathe a levels till june then I'm free and know that I gave it my all.

Reply 9

username3521346

OP

3

Original post by num.7

i would resit year 12 to do those a-levels.

your parents would disapprove and you would feel terrible for having to resit but it's your life - you can start living it or you can choose not to, end up depressed for the rest of your life, filled with regret and hate all the way up until you're on your death bed, contemplating on your past and asking yourself, "was it really worth it?". you only live once and if that's how you wish to spend the next 70 years of your time, so be it.

once you get your as-level results back and it's disappointing (who knows? you might decide to persevere through this and find a way to do well), then i would resit year 12 with those a-levels and explain the predicament you were in to your teachers. generally speaking, they're quite understanding so i'm sure you'll be fine.