I thiNk I'm agnostic and might end up atheist .need help

So thing is I have been a Christian since birth and was and still greatlu involved in church activity. But lately i have been getting this creeping feeling of dobting the relevance of my faith. You see I grew up in a home wher my dad, a senio member of the churvh and also since birth was very loud and abusive. It sermed the whole family from Mom to me would simply take a demolishing every day have my self esteem sent to dust and still see the same man dacting all Mr Nice Guy at church . Sometimes there would be evidence of h8m cheating on mom. All we would do was pray about it but for the past 15 years nothing's changed. I have since begun to doubt the authenticity of my religion because i tuen wonder how after i cry everyday someone who is said to care seems ti just sit and watch it happen. Any suggestions?

So what's next man , it sucks

So thing is I have been a Christian since birth and was and still greatlu involved in church activity. But lately i have been getting this creeping feeling of dobting the relevance of my faith. You see I grew up in a home wher my dad, a senio member of the churvh and also since birth was very loud and abusive. It sermed the whole family from Mom to me would simply take a demolishing every day have my self esteem sent to dust and still see the same man dacting all Mr Nice Guy at church . Sometimes there would be evidence of h8m cheating on mom. All we would do was pray about it but for the past 15 years nothing's changed. I have since begun to doubt the authenticity of my religion because i tuen wonder how after i cry everyday someone who is said to care seems ti just sit and watch it happen. Any suggestions?

So what's next man , it sucks

I bet it does. Perhaps the first thing is to find someone who will listen to your feelings, doubts and difficulties without judging you and without trying to impose an agenda of their own. Is there anyone in your life you feel able to confide in? A school counsellor maybe? Childline are good listeners, and there are also young people's counselling services you can chat with online like kooth.com

Im at a point where its really difficult to get a neutral opinion because most of my peers and surrounding adults attend the same church which tends to throw a blind eye to these issues so I thought maybe the Student Room could be a good start

So thing is I have been a Christian since birth and was and still greatlu involved in church activity. But lately i have been getting this creeping feeling of dobting the relevance of my faith. You see I grew up in a home wher my dad, a senio member of the churvh and also since birth was very loud and abusive. It sermed the whole family from Mom to me would simply take a demolishing every day have my self esteem sent to dust and still see the same man dacting all Mr Nice Guy at church . Sometimes there would be evidence of h8m cheating on mom. All we would do was pray about it but for the past 15 years nothing's changed. I have since begun to doubt the authenticity of my religion because i tuen wonder how after i cry everyday someone who is said to care seems ti just sit and watch it happen. Any suggestions?

Have you considered looking into other faiths? Many people stick to their birth religion or abandon religion entirely because they throw the baby with the bath water, but I would strongly suggest looking into other religions. I used to be Agnostic and almost an Atheist, but I looked into religions and ruled them out one by one until I concluded that Islam was the strongest and most authentically transmitted religion out there which does not oppress you logically (by believing in a 3 in 1 God) and has a book which has not been changed etc, teaching pure monotheism and submission to one God.

Begin a religious journey seeking truth and pray to God directly for guidance and He will guide you, God willing.