Do forums distract us from facing our relationship woes?

I assume it would help in some respects, it's often impossible to discuss certain situations without bringing to your partner's attention that there is a problem, which should instead be quietly dealt with in order to minimise the negative effect they have on the relationship.

I'm pathetically poor at talking things through though so I may be biased.

hmm you have a point but I think sometimes they just want to get others peoples perspective etc before they go and speak to their partner rather than going straight to their partner and maybe not thinking it through or not getting another opinion on it. I see what you're saying though

Well, as with most things, we'd probably be discussing these things face-to-face with friends without the internet

However, some things are quite personal so maybe they'd be difficult to talk about. I guess you'd just ponder alone on the outcomes, maybe write in to a newspaper column or something!

Would no internet lead you to be more open with your partner? I don't know... I'm inclined to say yes, though that's pretty damning for our generation.

Hmm, I've just always been raised to be honest and forthcoming, I don't hide my feelings as much as some people do and I can be very blunt (as I'm sure my posts indicate), so whenever I've had a problem with a girl I say, then again, I am single. =/ .

It is a nice trait i..e the person your with will know that you will just say it as it is and not be afraid to share your feelings - basically you would just be truthful which could mean you have a healthy relationship if that makes sense?

LOL: ah well, I can think of worse things so no point in worrying about it =]

Thank you. That's something that I like hearing and i appreciate when people are open and honest with me.

But people are always happy until you're honest with them, then suddenly you're a dick for telling the truth. haha

Also, seems every thriving relationship around me has some kind of dishonesty but seems healthy, whereas those which are more honest tend to struggle. I guess people aren't as accommodating to negativity as they let on.

no problem

yeah that is so true- they do say the truth hurts though LOL

I suppose it depends how you tell the truth also some people may say it in a way where it is not the whole truth but there is an element of truthfulness. Yeah that is another thing not everyone is ready to hear the truth which could be why those relationships are struggling a bit as you say. I suppose the key thing is just balance and being able to read your partner to the extent where you can foresee whether they will be able to take on what you have to say or whether they will just like go completely nuts over what you've just said haha lol

yeah I get what you mean, I can be very blunt though, which is probably part of it. I mean in relationships in general more than with girls, I don't think I can be annoyed at anyone but myself if the truth I have to offer pushes her away.

Oh right. In general do you think your truthfulness/ bluntness has ever pushed people away from you? Hmm I suppose but it really depends what it is. If it is something important which needs to be voiced then you can't exactly not say it and if she can't take it then she may be to blame but it also depends how you say it and what exactly it is. In other words, it may be your fault if shes pushed away but then again it may not entirely be so therefore you shouldn't be so annoyed.

I think it'd perhaps be more helpful because people get a chance to rant and either realise that they're overreacting over a certain issue and that it'd be silly to raise it with the other person so it avoids causing unnecessary arguments or they have people replying to tell them that they need to bring it up with the other person and tell them how to go about it.

But that takes out the passion. :P If people knew exactly what to do to keep things cool in relatioinships, couple would just get bored.

That's true, sometimes it takes a bit of arguing to make you realise how much someone cares/how much they mean to you.

I wonder how much importance people actually place on the advice given from forums. A lot of people only seem to hear what they want from the threads they make and listen to the posts that just reaffirm what they already thought.
I've done it myself, I've asked for advice for problems and I just wanted reassurance that I was right and ignored advice I found too difficult.