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My boyfriend says I stress him out easily...

Okay so I would like to ask that people try not to say "Oh just break up with him" because obviously I have my reasons for not wanting to and I love him endlessly.

So recently... we've been having a really, really rough patch. On Valentine's day he almost broke up with me, but changed his mind. He has told me he currently has "mixed feelings" and I can't help but feel there is another underlying problem affecting our relationship and how he feels. He asked for space on Sunday to figure out what he wants... so basically whether to break up with me or not.

I have asked to talk about the matter but he won't talk to me, he just simply says "I don't want to talk" or "I'm trying not to think about it", but he has said to me twice that maybe we should try to take things slow again (we have been together for more than 3 years, but we were in an LDR for most of it, and as soon as I came to uni we basically spent every moment together which is very bad, I know).

He has said these things to me today when I asked if we could just talk about it, and he said that when I am with him or when we talk I stress him out easily, but it doesn't stop him missing me when I'm not with him...

I just want to know what is going on in his head? He has never ever been good with coping with stress and I have noticed that as soon as something even remotely stresses him out, he just wants to push it away...

And also, this is probably my wishful thinking but I keep thinking he is finding it hard to deal with life in general, and to cope with stress... and that is affecting him and the relationship a lot... and I feel like he needs to see someone about it or he needs some sort of help to learn how to cope...

Also, I have asked him to tell me what it is that I do that stresses him out, but he has said "I don't think it's you?"

I don't know what to do... I know that there's a part of him that doesn't want to let me go, but also a huge part of him filled with doubts and what not, which could be down to something which has nothing to do with me or the relationship...

So what do you guys think? Currently I am just going to leave him alone... but can anyone tell me what is going on at all T_T I want to know the perspectives on this..

Reply 1

Mankytoes

Original post by Anonymous

He has never ever been good with coping with stress and I have noticed that as soon as something even remotely stresses him out, he just wants to push it away...

Ha, sounds just like me. If faced with something stressful, I tend to ignore it for a few days, then kinda get forced to face it, and because the idea has settled in my mind, it's better for me. Not great, but that's how my mind works.

Give him some time, but demand a proper answer, don't get strung along.