I can bet none of you have this problem regarding sex.
My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 months and started to have sex about 2 months into the relationship (we lost our virginity to each other).
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
Firstly I think your girlfriend needs to go to the doctor as she shouldn't feel pain during sex. If it just turns out she has a short vagina then you need to avoid putting the whole length in and do just the tip.
Secondly, not being able to come is caused by anxiety during sex. Perhaps because you are worried that you are hurting her so you can't relax and enjoy it.
resolve the first problem and they'll both be fixed
Secondly, not being able to come is caused by anxiety during sex. Perhaps because you are worried that you are hurting her so you can't relax and enjoy it.
resolve the first problem and they'll both be fixed
From what I can tell it just seems like your too big for her. Or maybe her vagina isn't as long as the average woman. I don't know which one it is but either way I don't think this can be just fixed. If you plan to stay with her you're going to have to help her get through this problem as you seem to be fine with it, so it really shouldn't matter in the first place.
If you cant get off maybe its because you cant go deep enough? I don't know enough about you guys to say much more but I hope this is better than nothing.
If you cant get off maybe its because you cant go deep enough? I don't know enough about you guys to say much more but I hope this is better than nothing.
Have you ever considered foreplay? A lack of it, as well as nerves, is usually the reason that peoples first time hurts, and perhaps you two are just repeating that again and again.
Also, can you make yourself cum, masturbation? If so, the reason that you are not doing that in sex is because the pain and awkwardness is half turning you off. Sort that out first.
Also, can you make yourself cum, masturbation? If so, the reason that you are not doing that in sex is because the pain and awkwardness is half turning you off. Sort that out first.
Original post by Hevachan
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Original post by Cpt Hunt
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Original post by Sir Candour
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All +1, for being very useful posts.
It was uncomfortable the first few times for us both, even though we weren't virgins. But foreplay, lube and patience made it very good.
I didn't cum the first few times, nerves and over thinking. It won't be great the first few times, but should be come very enjoyable and only gets better.
The hitting the back I would see a doc, but also nerves can 'mess' with many a thing. Definitely see a doc, and reassure her that it can happen to anyone. A) because it genuinely can B) people do silly things for each other and it will be better if she doesn't struggle through.
I didn't cum the first few times, nerves and over thinking. It won't be great the first few times, but should be come very enjoyable and only gets better.
The hitting the back I would see a doc, but also nerves can 'mess' with many a thing. Definitely see a doc, and reassure her that it can happen to anyone. A) because it genuinely can B) people do silly things for each other and it will be better if she doesn't struggle through.
If you're hitting her cervix, it may be that she needs more foreplay - vaginas lengthen when aroused, so it may be that she's too nervous or whatever to be completely relaxed. Try changing position as well - different bodies fit differently together, so it's really a case of trial and error to work out what works for you two.
As for not being able to cum, make sure you explain to her that it's 100% not that she's not attractive or that she's bad in bed or whatever. It could be that the two problems you two are having form a vicious cycle making you both too anxious to enjoy yourselves, resulting in you not being able to cum and her not being able to feel completely comfortable.
Have you tried oral? As foreplay it can be brilliant for making you both feel relaxed and eliminating anxiety.
Basically just try and relax and keep on experimenting - sex is meant to be fun not a source of stress, so please don't be too anxious!
As for not being able to cum, make sure you explain to her that it's 100% not that she's not attractive or that she's bad in bed or whatever. It could be that the two problems you two are having form a vicious cycle making you both too anxious to enjoy yourselves, resulting in you not being able to cum and her not being able to feel completely comfortable.
Have you tried oral? As foreplay it can be brilliant for making you both feel relaxed and eliminating anxiety.
Basically just try and relax and keep on experimenting - sex is meant to be fun not a source of stress, so please don't be too anxious!
Maybe try a different condom, i recommend thin feel, ribbed condoms are a heavy piece of kit.
you're eerily correct in supposing I don't share your predicament. No woman has ever protested that my penis was too big or that I took too long to ejaculate. On the contrary, if anything.
Yep, some of us have just got the magic.
Yep, some of us have just got the magic.
She sounds lazy, like one of those girls who just lies down there with their legs open and expect he guy to do all the work. Force her into new positions if you have to (she has to learn sometime) eventually you'll both find one that works.
As for your needs you may need a new stimuli to break the monotony or "bed death" your experiencing. Suggestion:
Spoon her (from behinds, obvs) continuously finger her pussy until she gushes, when she gushes do not stop keep on - but - when she cums penetrate her arse with your cock while wanking her clit with your fingers. This way you make her feel comfortable, educate her and introduce new positions and techniques into a flagging sex life. You'll discover a tighter hole that needs no contraception so you'll get off too.
As for your needs you may need a new stimuli to break the monotony or "bed death" your experiencing. Suggestion:
Spoon her (from behinds, obvs) continuously finger her pussy until she gushes, when she gushes do not stop keep on - but - when she cums penetrate her arse with your cock while wanking her clit with your fingers. This way you make her feel comfortable, educate her and introduce new positions and techniques into a flagging sex life. You'll discover a tighter hole that needs no contraception so you'll get off too.
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by TylerClementi
She sounds lazy, like one of those girls who just lies down there with their legs open and expect he guy to do all the work. Force her into new positions if you have to (she has to learn sometime) eventually you'll both find one that works.
As for your needs you may need a new stimuli to break the monotony or "bed death" your experiencing. Suggestion:
Spoon her (from behinds, obvs) continuously finger her pussy until she gushes, when she gushes do not stop keep on - but - when she cums penetrate her arse with your cock while wanking her clit with your fingers. This way you make her feel comfortable, educate her and introduce new positions and techniques into a flagging sex life. You'll discover a tighter hole that needs no contraception so you'll get off too.
As for your needs you may need a new stimuli to break the monotony or "bed death" your experiencing. Suggestion:
Spoon her (from behinds, obvs) continuously finger her pussy until she gushes, when she gushes do not stop keep on - but - when she cums penetrate her arse with your cock while wanking her clit with your fingers. This way you make her feel comfortable, educate her and introduce new positions and techniques into a flagging sex life. You'll discover a tighter hole that needs no contraception so you'll get off too.
Posted from TSR Mobile
We use foreplay a lot, and it seems to help to begin with but then the same problem keeps comming up
I wish that was the case, she prefers being on top and doesn't mind going at it for however long but it still doesn't seem to helo
Again you would be surprised but I dont think foreplay is the issue because in her words, the foreplay is amazing and she is ready but apparently not. We have tried every position you can think of.
Also attraction isn't the issue either, she is absolutely stunning
Also attraction isn't the issue either, she is absolutely stunning
Original post by Anonymous
My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 months and started to have sex about 2 months into the relationship (we lost our virginity to each other).
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
Easy to solve.
Don't just smash away at her it hurts so learn what she like by asking for direction (talk about it before you have sex)
As for you not jizzing it is extremely likely to be a mental thing.
I would bet it is because you don't feel you can fully let go with yourself with her
Posted from TSR Mobile
What about if she gives you oral - does that get you any closer or...?
Original post by Anonymous
My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 months and started to have sex about 2 months into the relationship (we lost our virginity to each other).
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
I love her very much and really enjoy the sex (which she is very good at), however a few problems arose. Firstly, whenever we have sex, it hurts her and she complains that it is hitting the back of her vagina and secondly I never seem to be able to get off, even after having sex for a long time (sometimes up to an hour of having sex).
I personally don't mind, however this makes her very upset as she feels as though she isnt good enough as I can make her orgasm but she cant return the favour. Even when I try to reassure her that she is good in bed, she wont listen to me.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated as
just lube up and dont thrust so deep
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