How would most Muslims react if a Muslim girl got married to a non-Muslim?
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Original post by Anonymous
Don't you find it sexist and unfair, say if your brother fell inlove with a Christian woman he would be OK to marry her but if you fell in love with Cheistian man, you wouldnt be allowed to marry him? Isn't this just a way to control women?
Of course id be allowed to marry a Christian man, i would just expect him to revert to Islam
If my brother wants to marry a christian woman im sure he would expect her to revert too.
Original post by sameehaiqbal
Of course id be allowed to marry a Christian man, i would just expect him to revert to Islam
If my brother wants to marry a christian woman im sure he would expect her to revert too.
If my brother wants to marry a christian woman im sure he would expect her to revert too.
Don't be dishonest now. If he had to revert for you to marry him then he would no longer be Christian but Muslim
Its honestly up to the girl and the boy. If they're happy it doesn't matter no one can stop them.
My parents always taught me..
we're going to teach you islam but if you would like to remain a Muslim thats up to you. They've never forced religion upon me and my brother. However, my step siblings did struggle. And hamdellah im a proud Muslim, ive been umrah once and planning to go Hajj next year.
But it doesn't matter about what the Muslim society think. The girls old enough to make her own decision 💕❤️
(I've stated my own opinion so don't judge) 💋
Posted from TSR Mobile
My parents always taught me..
we're going to teach you islam but if you would like to remain a Muslim thats up to you. They've never forced religion upon me and my brother. However, my step siblings did struggle. And hamdellah im a proud Muslim, ive been umrah once and planning to go Hajj next year.
But it doesn't matter about what the Muslim society think. The girls old enough to make her own decision 💕❤️
(I've stated my own opinion so don't judge) 💋
Posted from TSR Mobile
(edited 7 years ago)
No need to evade the truth, to put it plainly if it was a Muslim girl then she would be ostracized or severely reprimanded.
*******************************************************************************
Culture blamers this is for you: (Note I've written in simple terms. It's far more complex than this.)
And for people in the comment section who believe that this is only true for Muslim girls of Asian decent (i.e. Pakistani, Indian) , they're wrong. Whilst it is stereo-typically true that Pakistanis and Indians (regardless of faith) are obsessed with reputation and shame (seen by uncountable acid attacks, honor killings of close family members, expulsion of family members etc.) the harsh actions towards a Muslim girl found guilty of this sin cannot be fully blamed on culture . Look at other ethnic groups (Arabs, Africans), where some of whom magically happen to be Muslim and act similarly to these Pakistanis and Indians. But wait! That could also be due to culture too! Oh yes and while we're at it I'm sure we could find a dozen pieces of evidence of how it relates all to culture and not the flawless Muslim community! Evidence points all too strongly to a trend that Muslims of most culture tend to act more severely with a girl if she was to do such an action (than with the opposite gender i.e male for those who do not know). The point I'm making is it is about time the Muslim community can accept some blame for their actions, and improve from there on instead of talking of culture to be some sort of belief system that is dissociated with religion and its interpretation.
The root of the problem is far more complex and inevitability would be in order to evoke change or to keep the status quo.
***************************************************************************************
Extra: logical explanations as to why it is so and conclusions from these
One possible reason why she is dealt with more harshly is due to the fact that it is only permissible for Muslim men to 'marry people of the book' hence see it as a more of a sin on the woman.
According to most scholars, men lead the marriage under Sharia. Thus a logical explanation is that the father could have more control over his children's faith than the Jewish/Christian wife. So what you see is that compared to women, a higher proportion of Muslim men marry.
But even marrying People of the Book is not recommended for men (since it's exclusive to them). Why? Incompatibility. The wife would have to be very pious to Christian standards, i.e following the bible intensely in the respect of prayers and daily life for her Judeo-Christian values to be 'more in sync' with that of the Muslim man. The bible ordains for wives to be submissive to their husbands. If this were the case for marriage this would bode well with the husband's demand of the children going to mosque, practicing Islam.
But then again take a look at reality. The logical argument above is purely conceptual. IN REALITY, Muslim men who marry Christians, Jews mostly end up with kids who are non-practicing, whilst their marriage is deemed 'okay' by some of the Muslim community.This is odd. Surely it could be a sin on the father for not having his children practice his faith.
Perhaps the 'conservative' Muslim community ought to tighten their rules of marriage for men in order to prevent them from sin, since they have done so for females.
*******************************************************************************
Culture blamers this is for you: (Note I've written in simple terms. It's far more complex than this.)
And for people in the comment section who believe that this is only true for Muslim girls of Asian decent (i.e. Pakistani, Indian) , they're wrong. Whilst it is stereo-typically true that Pakistanis and Indians (regardless of faith) are obsessed with reputation and shame (seen by uncountable acid attacks, honor killings of close family members, expulsion of family members etc.) the harsh actions towards a Muslim girl found guilty of this sin cannot be fully blamed on culture . Look at other ethnic groups (Arabs, Africans), where some of whom magically happen to be Muslim and act similarly to these Pakistanis and Indians. But wait! That could also be due to culture too! Oh yes and while we're at it I'm sure we could find a dozen pieces of evidence of how it relates all to culture and not the flawless Muslim community! Evidence points all too strongly to a trend that Muslims of most culture tend to act more severely with a girl if she was to do such an action (than with the opposite gender i.e male for those who do not know). The point I'm making is it is about time the Muslim community can accept some blame for their actions, and improve from there on instead of talking of culture to be some sort of belief system that is dissociated with religion and its interpretation.
The root of the problem is far more complex and inevitability would be in order to evoke change or to keep the status quo.
***************************************************************************************
Extra: logical explanations as to why it is so and conclusions from these
One possible reason why she is dealt with more harshly is due to the fact that it is only permissible for Muslim men to 'marry people of the book' hence see it as a more of a sin on the woman.
According to most scholars, men lead the marriage under Sharia. Thus a logical explanation is that the father could have more control over his children's faith than the Jewish/Christian wife. So what you see is that compared to women, a higher proportion of Muslim men marry.
But even marrying People of the Book is not recommended for men (since it's exclusive to them). Why? Incompatibility. The wife would have to be very pious to Christian standards, i.e following the bible intensely in the respect of prayers and daily life for her Judeo-Christian values to be 'more in sync' with that of the Muslim man. The bible ordains for wives to be submissive to their husbands. If this were the case for marriage this would bode well with the husband's demand of the children going to mosque, practicing Islam.
But then again take a look at reality. The logical argument above is purely conceptual. IN REALITY, Muslim men who marry Christians, Jews mostly end up with kids who are non-practicing, whilst their marriage is deemed 'okay' by some of the Muslim community.This is odd. Surely it could be a sin on the father for not having his children practice his faith.
Perhaps the 'conservative' Muslim community ought to tighten their rules of marriage for men in order to prevent them from sin, since they have done so for females.
I find it funny how your friend is more concerned about the backlash she would receive from the Muslim community rather than her parents who raised her? Aren't their opinions worth more to her than strangers?
Or better yet GOD's opinion of her?
Unless her boyfriend's planning on wearing a t-shirt that blatantly says, 'I'm a christian dating a Muslim girl' the Muslim community aren't really going to know what his religious beliefs are when they're together, white British Muslim males exist you know?
Anyways, as a British Muslim myself I'm not really going to do anything about it, I can give her a bit of dawah if she would like that, lol. No wait, even better, get a Muslim brother to give her boyfriend a bit of dawah. But otherwise it's their life and no one has the right to force anything on when it comes to religious matters (as is says there is no compulsion in religion in the Quran).
Or better yet GOD's opinion of her?
Unless her boyfriend's planning on wearing a t-shirt that blatantly says, 'I'm a christian dating a Muslim girl' the Muslim community aren't really going to know what his religious beliefs are when they're together, white British Muslim males exist you know?
Anyways, as a British Muslim myself I'm not really going to do anything about it, I can give her a bit of dawah if she would like that, lol. No wait, even better, get a Muslim brother to give her boyfriend a bit of dawah. But otherwise it's their life and no one has the right to force anything on when it comes to religious matters (as is says there is no compulsion in religion in the Quran).
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
Coming from a religious Muslim family who also keeps in very close touch with his Imam (to gain better understanding of Islam), this would be haram. The guy HAS to convert. I would seriously speak to her parents and get it sorted because first of all she has been "dating". Doesn't take long to realise that's haram. The guy has to convert otherwise it could be haram. Just to clarify that means she will be getting punished and possibly in the eyes of Allah doing what is classified as an unforgiving sin.
Tbh, knowing the public, they would gossip the hell out of her. Knowing girls (without sounding sexist) lots of them can be immature (like men). My point is that it could just be an infatuation in the same way that many teenagers have crushes and think they have found love. I highly doubt she is in love seriously. Although if she does istakharah and still and gets others to do it also and the same result, then speak to parents etc and get him to convert. Obviously he won't feel comfortable because of obvious reasons I don't want to state so then move on.
If she really is a good Muslim, she will find someone even better. Allah's rule is you get in what you put in. You put hardwork in you will succeed in exams , otherwise fail. You be a good muslim and person, you will find what you desire in a partner.
Tbh, knowing the public, they would gossip the hell out of her. Knowing girls (without sounding sexist) lots of them can be immature (like men). My point is that it could just be an infatuation in the same way that many teenagers have crushes and think they have found love. I highly doubt she is in love seriously. Although if she does istakharah and still and gets others to do it also and the same result, then speak to parents etc and get him to convert. Obviously he won't feel comfortable because of obvious reasons I don't want to state so then move on.
If she really is a good Muslim, she will find someone even better. Allah's rule is you get in what you put in. You put hardwork in you will succeed in exams , otherwise fail. You be a good muslim and person, you will find what you desire in a partner.
First of all, as a Muslim, I find your post utterly disgusting. The way you're speaking makes you sound very judgmental. OP asked about Muslims' reactions towards a Muslim girl marrying a non-Muslim guy, and you're here preaching how it's haram to date. Secondly, your statement "I highly doubt she is in love" is ridiculous because who are you to make such claims? Do you even know OP's friend? No. Then shut it. And finally, "if she really is a good Muslim"? Wow. You really are a judgmental person. Your post seriously annoyed me.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm asking because my best friend has been dating a Christian white guy or 3 years now and believes he's the one. He's a nice guy that doesn't drink but doesn't want to convert. Her parents don't know and her sister just found out recently, so yeah she had to keep it hidden. She said her parents wouldn't kill her but would probably disown her by stop talking to her, unless she can convince him to convert. She's more concerned with the backlash and the hate the Muslim community will have towards her, which is her biggest fear because apparently her life would be made a living hell.
I don't know many Muslims apart from my friend so I wondered, how would most British Muslims really react to this?
Are there any Muslims here that can give their view?
I don't know many Muslims apart from my friend so I wondered, how would most British Muslims really react to this?
Are there any Muslims here that can give their view?
Hey, British Bengali here coming from a modern but still Muslim household.
3, yes 3 of my Muslim aunts got married to White Christian guys. And although 2 did convert, the other is just as accepted in the family. The only thing my parents always said to me is you can marry whoever you like, just as long as the children are brought up Muslim. Yes my grandfather, who is basically evil, stopped talking with those aunts for a while, he eventually got back onto good terms with them and we are now just one big happy family. They all just came down my house yesterday actually, that's how accepted they are! So believe me, everything will be alright!
(edited 6 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I'm asking because my best friend has been dating a Christian white guy or 3 years now and believes he's the one. He's a nice guy that doesn't drink but doesn't want to convert. Her parents don't know and her sister just found out recently, so yeah she had to keep it hidden. She said her parents wouldn't kill her but would probably disown her by stop talking to her, unless she can convince him to convert. She's more concerned with the backlash and the hate the Muslim community will have towards her, which is her biggest fear because apparently her life would be made a living hell.
I don't know many Muslims apart from my friend so I wondered, how would most British Muslims really react to this?
Are there any Muslims here that can give their view?
I don't know many Muslims apart from my friend so I wondered, how would most British Muslims really react to this?
Are there any Muslims here that can give their view?
anon because it's private. I have a lot to say regarding this.
I was actually in a relationship with a Christian guy for over a year, I am a Muslim girl and this was my first relationship. He was born a Christian although he identified himself as more of an Atheist. At the time, his religious beliefs did not concern me, I wanted him to believe in whatever he wanted to believe, and he didn't ever interfere with my own beliefs. However, it became problematic, I knew that I wasn't supposed to be with him, yet we really wanted to be together, which meant we snuck around a lot and I'd be left feeling so guilty for deceiving my parents.
He'd always ask why I couldn't just spend nights at his house, and wanted me to openly tell my parents that I was going to spend the night at my boyfriend's and couldn't understand why that would have terrible consequences for me. We'd have to sneak out and go on weekend getaways and it was a lot of hard work. In the end we broke up (due to other reasons). It wasn't really fair on him because I had to keep him a secret, if my family found out, they'd probably disown me and hate him. We would never have their blessing to get married. Plus, he'd have to convert and I don't think he realised how different his life would be - giving up alcohol, pork, bacon etc things he consumes on a daily basis. He deserved to be with someone who could openly introduce him to everybody, and wouldn't need him change who he was to be together etc.
I had to choose between the family that raised me, or a boy who I thought I loved at the time (it was a very dysfunctional relationship), it was only my first relationship too and I was 19, there'd be other guys. I chose family and then met a guy (Muslim) that I actually love even more than my ex and am far more compatible with.
I would probably want her thrown out of the house and community to be honest. If she loves her white boyfriend so much then he can provide for her.
We don't need to agree with the western style of thinking. People need to stop being so offended that we are not going to agree with just letting it pass. Their sense of entitlement is grotesque.
We don't need to agree with the western style of thinking. People need to stop being so offended that we are not going to agree with just letting it pass. Their sense of entitlement is grotesque.
Man this thread makes me laugh.
How does it feel knowing for the past two years i've been smashing a 9/10 arab chick who's muslim and i'm BLACK so i'm probably even worse in you guys barbaric outdated eyes. If we marry there's NO way i'm converting though I might say some arabic ******** just for lols.
Seeing all the pakistani/indian/arab guys who get jealous is so jokes and the amount of times it comes to blows is unreal. You guys are mad territorial. Lucky I can handle my ****.
How does it feel knowing for the past two years i've been smashing a 9/10 arab chick who's muslim and i'm BLACK so i'm probably even worse in you guys barbaric outdated eyes. If we marry there's NO way i'm converting though I might say some arabic ******** just for lols.
Seeing all the pakistani/indian/arab guys who get jealous is so jokes and the amount of times it comes to blows is unreal. You guys are mad territorial. Lucky I can handle my ****.
Original post by James.Carnell
I would probably want her thrown out of the house and community to be honest. If she loves her white boyfriend so much then he can provide for her.
We don't need to agree with the western style of thinking. People need to stop being so offended that we are not going to agree with just letting it pass. Their sense of entitlement is grotesque.
We don't need to agree with the western style of thinking. People need to stop being so offended that we are not going to agree with just letting it pass. Their sense of entitlement is grotesque.
ironic as you live in a western society and use all that they provide you yet you don't agree to their style of living.
if you don't want to free with the western style thinking the get out of here lol.
Why are you are all so obsessed with racial and ethnic difference.
Get over it.
Get over it.
Original post by Pretish
ironic as you live in a western society and use all that they provide you yet you don't agree to their style of living.
if you don't want to free with the western style thinking the get out of here lol.
if you don't want to free with the western style thinking the get out of here lol.
You think like a prostitute. And you know nothing about me or my nationality.
It's a bit stupid, really. For both men and women.
Original post by James.Carnell
You think like a prostitute. And you know nothing about me or my nationality.
your on tsr so there's a high chance u r from the UK which is a western union.
just because I found a flaw in ur argument doesn't mean I think like a prostitute. you expect to be given the same treatment as everyone in a western society yet yet u r stubborn to agree with their style of thinking.
Original post by Pretish
your on tsr so there's a high chance u r from the UK which is a western union.
just because I found a flaw in ur argument doesn't mean I think like a prostitute. you expect to be given the same treatment as everyone in a western society yet yet u r stubborn to agree with their style of thinking.
just because I found a flaw in ur argument doesn't mean I think like a prostitute. you expect to be given the same treatment as everyone in a western society yet yet u r stubborn to agree with their style of thinking.
I am not originally from the UK.
Their style of thinking is that hojabis open their legs for any white man to impregnate, thats western liberalism in a nutshell. Thank God not every Muslim thinks like you.
Original post by James.Carnell
I am not originally from the UK.
Their style of thinking is that hojabis open their legs for any white man to impregnate, thats western liberalism in a nutshell. Thank God not every Muslim thinks like you.
Their style of thinking is that hojabis open their legs for any white man to impregnate, thats western liberalism in a nutshell. Thank God not every Muslim thinks like you.
I'm not even Muslim so u were wrong here. but if every Muslim thinks like you then this religion needs a reform.
Original post by Pretish
I'm not even Muslim so u were wrong here. but if every Muslim thinks like you then this religion needs a reform.
What? So all the Muslim women are brainwashed into thinking white men are right? Give me a break. You preach evil.
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