What do I do?

Girl2020

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year, I knew something wasn’t right with him. So I looked on his phone and found that he had kissed another woman when he was drunk. He has cheated on previous girlfriends but has never loved anyone. He hasn’t cheated before. Do I break up with him? I love him and I don’t want to break up with him but does that make me weak?

Reply 1

Girl2020

OP

2

Original post by Volibear

Right so he's cheated (and is a serial cheater) and you've invaded his privacy and clearly never trusted him. I would suggest having a nice chat and then breaking up. Either that or you could get a nice tattoo and write doormat across your forehead as well as prepare for your upcoming debut on Jeremy Kyle.

Completely the opposite actually, we both go on each others phones openly, the way I found out is the woman had sent a picture to him and it automatically got saved to his photos. We both look at each others photos all the time not “looking” for anything just because we both screenshot photos of each other so I was looking at them.

He has cheated on other girls before but when he was very young and hasn’t done it to me until now (he kissed the woman didn’t sleep with her) I don’t want to throw the relationship away because I’ve messed up in the past aswell. But also as you say... I don’t want to be a doormat.

Reply 2

Hopefully1

12

I believe you need to do some serious soul searching. My opinion is if you are in a declared boyfriend/girlfriend relationship then you take yourself off limits to others regardless of whether or not you actually are in love. What's the point of declaring a relationship if you're not going to be true to that relationship - unless you have an agreement to be open from the very beginning. Anyway, if he's cheated on previous girlfriends (that he hasn't loved) why do you feel you are different than they were? Has he told you he loves you? Some people, even if they love their partner, just can't stay faithful. Sounds like your bf may fall into that category.

So, what are you willing to put up with? Honestly, if he's cheated on you once (and you can say it was only a kiss but it will proceed to more with other women, I'm afraid) he'll cheat again in the future. I don't believe this will be a one time event given his history. If it was me I'd say break up with him.... you can do better (which I do believe) but I don't know him or you so what I say doesn't matter. What do you feel is right? But, I promise this..... if you chose to break up with him you will find someone else!! You will enter that relationship wiser and knowing what you will and won't put up with and recognize the red flags early on.

Best of luck!

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Hopefully1

I believe you need to do some serious soul searching. My opinion is if you are in a declared boyfriend/girlfriend relationship then you take yourself off limits to others regardless of whether or not you actually are in love. What's the point of declaring a relationship if you're not going to be true to that relationship - unless you have an agreement to be open from the very beginning. Anyway, if he's cheated on previous girlfriends (that he hasn't loved) why do you feel you are different than they were? Has he told you he loves you? Some people, even if they love their partner, just can't stay faithful. Sounds like your bf may fall into that category.

So, what are you willing to put up with? Honestly, if he's cheated on you once (and you can say it was only a kiss but it will proceed to more with other women, I'm afraid) he'll cheat again in the future. I don't believe this will be a one time event given his history. If it was me I'd say break up with him.... you can do better (which I do believe) but I don't know him or you so what I say doesn't matter. What do you feel is right? But, I promise this..... if you chose to break up with him you will find someone else!! You will enter that relationship wiser and knowing what you will and won't put up with and recognize the red flags early on.

Best of luck!

I felt differently because throughout the relationship he had truly cared about me... we have a long distance relationship and we haven’t been in the best of places for the past couple of weeks where we were on the verge of breaking up. It was at this time that he kissed her.

i am a strong believer of people can change but I’m torn Between giving it up or starting fresh with our relationship

Thank you for your advice though it made me feel a lot better!

What do I do?

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