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Female colleague putting me down for having an opinion on everything

I've been working at this bar for three months and had this female colleague, who I've gotten on really well with and enjoyed the company of having.

Although recently as yesterday on our shift she said she "wasn't my friend anymore" because I complained that I was unhappy about our shift manager sending her home early from her shift (not for the first or second time by the same shift manager), especially as all she did was stay at the bar and kept speaking to one of our colleagues whilst me and the others cleaned up the bar instead, and criticised me for having an opinion on it and about everything. Before that she seemed fine with me during the shift as we were on talking terms up until then.

I told her that the complaint was fictional although I was unhappy about her being sent home early. I said to her multiple times yesterday to come and speak to me more about it once I was on break from my shift yesterday but she didn't come to me, even when she was sent home early AGAIN she just went straight home ironically without bothering to look for me. Before she mentioned how unhappy she was with me, a customer verbally abused me saying "**** you" then she said I deserved the abuse I got.

She's also shown a tendency to try and put me down in my work and dating life, telling me that it was embarrassing the way I approached a girl I was interested in during one of my shift and couldn't understand why I go for certain girls when I clearly told her before that I literally have no preferences for girls. She's been telling her friends about how me and her family friend, who she tried to set me up with because she both went to the same Uni, have a thing going on when at the time I hadn't even seen a picture of the girl let alone met her.

I tried to be mature about the situation but I can't understand her behaviour and the sudden left turn by her, whether she's beginning to show some true colours of hers or not. She was her normal self around the other colleagues but not me as soon as she said what she said and I fear there's going to be tension and awkwardness. Maybe I was wrong to be unhappy about decisions made by management or question it but at the same time I feel anyone is entitled to voice their opinion on anything as long as it is neither ignorant nor unreasonable and is respectful of other views, especially as an employee and if it's work-related. It's weird she would say what she said as she's very sociable with everyone and is very chatty, to the point where sometimes she loses focus and doesn't do her job

Reply 1

Napp

In fairness you come off a bit of a **** in then scenario...

Reply 2

the bear

complaining will not win you new friends.

Reply 3

Sammylou40

As a general rule, no one likes the company of a person who is too opinionated, too vocal and feels the need to be involved in every one else’s business

Try a different tack. Be friendly and don’t pass comment. Concentrate on doing your own job and leave the management to the manager

Reply 4

bones-mccoy

From experience, I know how annoying it is when the same person keeps being sent home early when you're on shift with them and therefore have to stay and do all the work yourself. It's okay if it's only the one time, but I wouldn't be happy with it happening constantly, it should at least be taken in turns. There's nothing wrong in addressing decisions made my management, I think it's the way you express your opinion about it that's crucial. Maybe speak to management directly about it rather than complaining to the girl?

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by Sammylou40

Yeah I see what you mean, I'm not a nosey kind of person but rather a curious person who tries to make conversation. Anyway I feel like I'm just gonna keep to myself at work nowadays