How old do I sound?

I'm 25, but presume that you never knew that, how old would you say I sound?

I still live at home with parents. I've got no friends and my only relationship ended several years ago. I don't like kids, I crave the peace and quiet, and kids prevent me from having this because they are so loud and keep screaming outside. I also don't like dogs barking, especially when I'm trying to sleep. I've got an alcohol problem, which is getting increasingly worse. My happiest days are behind me, now there is nothing but the miserable future to be prepared for. As you may have already guessed, I am depressed. There's no point in getting a job, especially not at the moment, as nobody is employing. A job would make me more depressed and I'd end up in fights with my colleagues, who'll think I'm a miserable so and so.

So have a guess, what age would you say I am?

You sound like someone who just hit her (assuming you are a female) early thirties, and reality hit them all at once.

My gender is irrelevant, but both men and women can get depressed.

Sounds like you need to get your act together and sort yourself out.

I would if I had a reason to.

I think you sound....25.

What do I win?