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Paranoid and loss of appetite after fight with bf?

2 days ago I fought with my boyfriend, we’ve literally been going out for 3 months and only been able to meet twice because of the lockdown and me having to be at uni. 2 days ago was our first fight and I overreacted to something he said about an insta model and acted childish by ignoring him which he got mad at.

He forgave me and we moved on but I’ve been paranoid and on edge ever since, i feel like he’s lost interest in me but I’m not sure if it’s all paranoia. It’s harder not being able to see him because of lockdown which is making it harder, we were meant to meet this week but he had family issues (which I know to be true). What makes me think he’s lost interest is that he use to respond a lot faster and now takes hours, although he is busy sometimes. I feel like I’m driving myself insane with paranoia and stress, I’ve not felt hungry for the past few days and I feel nauseous all the time. I had to force myself to eat something today and I couldn’t finish dinner because I felt too nauseated. I’ve not been hungry AT all ever since that day and I don’t feel like it’s normal to feel like this after one fight. I’m not sure what’s wrong with me. I don’t want to bring it up to him because I feel like I’ll sound crazy, like I’m some needy girl that needs constant validation that he still likes me and wants to see me again. Maybe I need some kind of therapy as I really don’t feel it’s normal to be this consumed and paranoid in a “relationship” with someone I’ve only met twice. I’m 21 years old

Reply 1

atmacca99

Is there any way you can voice your concerns to him about the aftermath of your recent fight? I imagine he would understand considering the difficult times we are facing with a pandemic in full swing - I wouldn't think too much into his delayed replies, he's human and he is probably just taking some well needed space and time for himself during the pandemic as it seems to be having an awful effect on people's mental health everywhere. Please, if you can, find yourself an outlet for your stress maybe something like picking up a new hobby or finding a new show to watch or just taking mental health days to relieve mental stress. There is nothing wrong with you - please don't think like that! This is a stressful time for everyone and you may just be dealing with your stress differently in these circumstances. I suggest voicing how you feel to him and explaining what you've been feeling since the fight and maybe you can get the answers you need to relieve this stress and you can work towards a better relationship after your fight. All that aside - I am proud of you for talking about it and reaching out for advice, that is brave within itself. Best of luck! :smile:

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

This insta and social media jealousy problem is very common - i don't think people are necessarily needy by default but this new social media dynamic strains relationships and for us girls it creates a lot of insecurity and even obsession sometimes - creating those problems even in relatively confident girls.

So just cut yourself slack to start with and realise there are rational reasons u feel this way, but that unless you can trust him (u should find out once and for all if he is trustworthy) then the problem is done with and you can settle your worries. Otherwise, online fears will keep coming up and over again.

IMO he shouldn't be making comments about other women in an inappropriate way. Of course that will make you uncomfortable. However also realise it's normal for us to admire others, and it happens even if we don't say anything. But also it's no big deal. Think how many times u saw a super hot guy and then that's it whatever. Do you compare your bf to hot guys you see and think less of him?