Feeling used and unwanted in a friendship

Hello guys/girls. I would like to ask you all some advice towards a problem I am having with a work friend. I am a a guy (27) who recently met a girl at work with whom I instantly clicked.

We met around three months ago and pretty much since day one things went really well. We have been constantly chatting and been going around together pretty much everyday at work (coffee break, lunch, etc...). It's not rare for her to check on me from time to time and when we talk if work allowed it we could chat for hours.

We have already hung out together with a few other friends and she has invited me several times to organize plans with our other colleagues. Just this Friday she checked on me about having a few beers after work but sadly I could not go.

After that she basically said that she wouldn't go to have beers with the other colleagues when I told her I was unavailable.

All of these tell me that she cares in some way but here is the problem I have. Since I thought the friendship was mutual I treated her exactly like any other friend.

Some silly things just as commenting her in Instagram about a story she uploaded or even proposing cool places that I discovered that we could go to some day. But she just keeps ignoring like two thirds of my messages.

Then the very next day she contacts me about something not related at all just to chat as If nothing had happened. All my other friends actually respond to me.

And it is driving me nuts because I don't know exactly my place in this relationship. It has admittedly left me feeling unwanted.

Even more the thing that really drives me mad is that she will acknowledge something I said to her in conversation, as in she has actually read the message.

Mind you, the relationship is simply platonic as we both have significant others. Before anyone reaches any conclusion.

Should I ask her about her inconsistency? Should I pull back from the friendship? Am I doing something wrong?

Something tells me asking why she doesn't respond would be needy, but I also don't know how to handle this sort of in between where I expect friends to be consistent.

Your thoughts?

in my opinion, when you offer someone attention and they figure that even if they distance themselves that they will still recieve said attention, they become comfortable and go at their own pace which means inconsistency will happen. You said she also has a partner so I am assuming she now only offers attention (in a platonic way of course) when she has nothing else to do (sounds tough I know) but that is because even when she does not input friendship effort, she knows you still will. I would suggest also distancing away and see if she gets concerned. If she starts suggesting to go out again or the friendship reverts back to how it was at the start, she will no longer will continue this friendship with low effort on her end and you should see improvement. If she does not, which is a possibility, she could be going through something or just may not want to be as close as you guys was before, which is understandable.

Hope this helps!

Let's be honest you like her but she doesn't like you that much

No need to be a douche

Really thougtful response. Thank you very much on you imput. Perhaps I have trully put more effort into the friiendship than her and she has thought me as a given, which sucks. Would you broach the topic about the uneven response rates? Or just let it be. I don't want a friendship to just fade but I also can't of course someone to act like a friend. I am torn honestly.