The Student Room Group

no one ever looks at me

I live in London so see a lot of people and I am going to use the tube as an example.

I'm 22F and whenever I see a guy I'm attracted to on the tube I look at them more than other people, guessing that's normal..? Anyway I know this is such a dumb question to ask and I shouldn't be overthinking something this stupid but no one ever looks at me (and I look around a lot so I would know if someone was looking at me). I'm not really that pretty tbh I'd rate myself a 2 maybe a 3 if I'm wearing mascara lol but I always see boys looking at girls on the tube who aren't supermodels or anything (they are all prettier than me but literally every girl I see gets stared at) and none of them ever look at me, only sometimes eye contact for 1 second then never another glance.

Is it normal for people to look at people a lot when they think they are pretty or attractive or is it just me and I probably look crazy lol. I knowww it's stupid to think about but it always makes me feel just really sad and hate myself more lol. Because I'll see guys who are insanely attractive to me and they won't even glance at me.

Even sometimes if I'm going on a night out and I put more effort into my outfit and my hair and makeup, I can look at the mirror and think I look slightly better like maybe a 4.5 or 5, but as soon as I go out in public my confidence plummets because I just don't attract guys. The ONLY people I've been looked at are people who have assaulted me on the train (OLD (ugly) men).

I'm probably gonna get complained at for this next bit I don't mean to be offensive or anything - yesterday I saw a girl who was let's say medically obese, I think she was around my age maybe a bit older. I don't want to sound like I'm bodyshaming because I don't have a problem with bigger people or anything I'm just stating facts here - she was wearing basically no clothes so all her'fat' was on show: stomach, back, legs, arms, chin.. She had a LOT of makeup on and she had facial hair that was visible... very visible... she had reasonably long hairs coming out of beauty spots... sorry for the visual.

BUT!!! Every guy was staring at her. Whether they were attracted to her or not, they still looked at her. I think I'm on the ugly side but I don't even get looked at for being ugly, I feel invisible all the time. :frown:
Have you tried therapy? I think it is basic to say someone is a 10 or maybe acidic when they are below 7.

Seriously though, everyone is beautiful. You just have to find what makes you feel beautiful. I have dated men that made women who knew they were more conventionally attractive compared to me ask me what he sees in me,
And I quote Maya Angelou:

“Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.”

Attraction and beauty is much more than looks. I want someone that lights a fire in me, that matches my energy.

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