bullying (please help)

so one of my friends has been bullying me for 3 years, and my mum told my head of year today. when he speaks to her, she's gonna b rlly angry, and all of my friends will side with her, and i'll lose my friends. idk what to do, i dont like having enemies, but she's making it hard for me. what should i do? i dont want to be lonely.

not all of my friends are bullying me,only one. the others are all going to side with her, and idk why. i've had like 5 breakdowns in the past 3 days, and she keeps texting me, asking why i hate her and im ignoring her.idk what to say, i'm so scared of losing all of my friends. one of them told the bully that i said mean things but i didnt and im scared she'll tell the head of year that i did, and get me in trouble. she makes my life so much hell :frown:

.

i'm so done with all of this

Reply 1

1mstuck

14

Original post by jesuisstupide

so one of my friends has been bullying me for 3 years, and my mum told my head of year today. when he speaks to her, she's gonna b rlly angry, and all of my friends will side with her, and i'll lose my friends. idk what to do, i dont like having enemies, but she's making it hard for me. what should i do? i dont want to be lonely.

not all of my friends are bullying me,only one. the others are all going to side with her, and idk why. i've had like 5 breakdowns in the past 3 days, and she keeps texting me, asking why i hate her and im ignoring her.idk what to say, i'm so scared of losing all of my friends. one of them told the bully that i said mean things but i didnt and im scared she'll tell the head of year that i did, and get me in trouble. she makes my life so much hell :frown:

.

i'm so done with all of this

its obvious they're not really your friends then. I'd advise you to find new friends and stop associating with your current friendship group.

Reply 2

jesuisstupide

OP

10

Original post by 1mstuck

its obvious they're not really your friends then. I'd advise you to find new friends and stop associating with your current friendship group.

yeah, but every time i try to get away from them they tell me i hate them and im ignoring them, and they always play the victim. plus if the year teacher believes all the things they say abt me,ill get in trouble too.

Reply 3

ProactiveMe

2

you clearly don't have friends. find you new ones and a way of proving your innocence to the teacher

Reply 4

jesuisstupide

OP

10

I do have friends aside from this group, i'm not that silly. idk how to prove innonence, i havent said anything mean about them so if they accuse me of it, i can only deny. that might make me look guilty though.

Reply 5

A jaded girl

7

Original post by jesuisstupide

so one of my friends has been bullying me for 3 years, and my mum told my head of year today. when he speaks to her, she's gonna b rlly angry, and all of my friends will side with her, and i'll lose my friends. idk what to do, i dont like having enemies, but she's making it hard for me. what should i do? i dont want to be lonely.

not all of my friends are bullying me,only one. the others are all going to side with her, and idk why. i've had like 5 breakdowns in the past 3 days, and she keeps texting me, asking why i hate her and im ignoring her.idk what to say, i'm so scared of losing all of my friends. one of them told the bully that i said mean things but i didnt and im scared she'll tell the head of year that i did, and get me in trouble. she makes my life so much hell :frown:

.

i'm so done with all of this

For a start how can this person possibly be a friend?

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by jesuisstupide

I do have friends aside from this group, i'm not that silly. idk how to prove innonence, i havent said anything mean about them so if they accuse me of it, i can only deny. that might make me look guilty though.

Im not at all trying to come across as mean or harsh but you do sound rather silly. Either youre really young or just lack common sense but theres no way u can call this bully your "friend", which applies to your other "friends" who will side with this bully. leading on from this, i dont get exactly what the issue is. is it that u dont wanna be lonely or that u think your "friends" will stir lies about you to your head of year? i mean you say you have friends aside from your group so being lonely shouldnt be an issue, and as for getting in trouble, i know schools deal with issues differently but its unlikely that they'll do much without proof. besides, you approached your head of year first which looks better for you.

Reply 7

jesuisstupide

OP

10

Original post by Anonymous

Im not at all trying to come across as mean or harsh but you do sound rather silly. Either youre really young or just lack common sense but theres no way u can call this bully your "friend", which applies to your other "friends" who will side with this bully. leading on from this, i dont get exactly what the issue is. is it that u dont wanna be lonely or that u think your "friends" will stir lies about you to your head of year? i mean you say you have friends aside from your group so being lonely shouldnt be an issue, and as for getting in trouble, i know schools deal with issues differently but its unlikely that they'll do much without proof. besides, you approached your head of year first which looks better for you.

look, it's a complex situation. i've tried multiple times to leave the friend group, because i know they don't treat me well, but they always follow me, and tell me to stop ignoring them. they get offended if i don't spend time with them, and one of my other friends say they only keep me in the group because they enjoy putting me down, which is probably true. however, some of the girls in the group are genuinely nice, but they've got caugt up in this, and i don't want to lose true friends with this. i feel like the bully will just deny everything, and make me look like a liar, because she's pretty cowardly, and isnt even secure enough to let me ignore her.

most of my other friends are in another class, and yes, i'm quite concerned abt the lies they're spreading. and i know i'm stupid, its my fault im getting bullied.

Reply 8

A jaded girl

7

Original post by jesuisstupide

look, it's a complex situation. i've tried multiple times to leave the friend group, because i know they don't treat me well, but they always follow me, and tell me to stop ignoring them. they get offended if i don't spend time with them, and one of my other friends say they only keep me in the group because they enjoy putting me down, which is probably true. however, some of the girls in the group are genuinely nice, but they've got caugt up in this, and i don't want to lose true friends with this. i feel like the bully will just deny everything, and make me look like a liar, because she's pretty cowardly, and isnt even secure enough to let me ignore her.

most of my other friends are in another class, and yes, i'm quite concerned abt the lies they're spreading. and i know i'm stupid, its my fault im getting bullied.

Ohhh for God sake itsss not difficult to walk away

Reply 9

jesuisstupide

OP

10

Original post by A jaded girl

Ohhh for God sake itsss not difficult to walk away

it really is, trust me. i've tried a good amount of times, and they always accuse me of being rude, ignoring them, and they'll play the victim, as if they aren't bullying me out of the group. not tryna be rude, but i'm still looking for an answer, and some empathy would help. plus, i've already walked away, but they're going to try and get me back on monday. they've been texting me, and i've left them all on delivered, but they're going to get angrier. so it's not that easy.

Reply 10

A jaded girl

7

Original post by jesuisstupide

it really is, trust me. i've tried a good amount of times, and they always accuse me of being rude, ignoring them, and they'll play the victim, as if they aren't bullying me out of the group. not tryna be rude, but i'm still looking for an answer, and some empathy would help. plus, i've already walked away, but they're going to try and get me back on monday. they've been texting me, and i've left them all on delivered, but they're going to get angrier. so it's not that easy.

The answer has been given to you, walk away and cut then off

Reply 11

jesuisstupide

OP

10

ok i'll try that i guess, but low chance of success, cause they are very persistant. :') thanks for the help

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Original post by jesuisstupide

ok i'll try that i guess, but low chance of success, cause they are very persistant. :') thanks for the help

ngl i honestly do feel for you like its not ur fault that you get bullied. its always cringe when somebody says bullying says more about the bully than the victim but its true. ur not stupid but honestly just stop hanging out with them and if they come up to u like you say just tell them to **** off because u dont need that. you say it like they hunt you down in school and even if that is the case just tell them to do one

Reply 13

Anonymous #2

Original post by jesuisstupide

so one of my friends has been bullying me for 3 years, and my mum told my head of year today. when he speaks to her, she's gonna b rlly angry, and all of my friends will side with her, and i'll lose my friends. idk what to do, i dont like having enemies, but she's making it hard for me. what should i do? i dont want to be lonely.

not all of my friends are bullying me,only one. the others are all going to side with her, and idk why. i've had like 5 breakdowns in the past 3 days, and she keeps texting me, asking why i hate her and im ignoring her.idk what to say, i'm so scared of losing all of my friends. one of them told the bully that i said mean things but i didnt and im scared she'll tell the head of year that i did, and get me in trouble. she makes my life so much hell :frown:

.

i'm so done with all of this

they are not your friends so dont call them that. A friend will understand you and know your boundaries, they shouldn't be treating you like this. block her on social media, block her number and anyone else who does the same to you. you should lose them, its their loss, they arent ur friends. Being lonely isnt a bad thing, you can make friends online. Plus, its better to be alone than to have friends that treat you the way you are getting treated. I would block them on everything, distance and find someone new - if you cant find someone else to stick with, just go by yourself - theres nothing rong with that. Talk to the most understanding person in the group about it and if they dont understand you, just walk away.
You sound quite young so let me tell you this, losing a friend isnt that big of a deal. You'll look back and think "why didnt i do this sooner". I understand how hard it is to walk away from someone as my friendship group used to be a mess but trust me, its the right thing to do.

Reply 14

Anonymous #3

Original post by jesuisstupide

so one of my friends has been bullying me for 3 years, and my mum told my head of year today. when he speaks to her, she's gonna b rlly angry, and all of my friends will side with her, and i'll lose my friends. idk what to do, i dont like having enemies, but she's making it hard for me. what should i do? i dont want to be lonely.
not all of my friends are bullying me,only one. the others are all going to side with her, and idk why. i've had like 5 breakdowns in the past 3 days, and she keeps texting me, asking why i hate her and im ignoring her.idk what to say, i'm so scared of losing all of my friends. one of them told the bully that i said mean things but i didnt and im scared she'll tell the head of year that i did, and get me in trouble. she makes my life so much hell :frown:

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i'm so done with all of this

Ive been in this exact position. Let me reassure you- get her told off. People who bully you and ridicule you are deeply insecure, and are actually the ones in my experience who are absolutely mortified when they get told off. They aren’t your friends at all if they are going to side with you when she is obviously giving you a very rough time. I was in the same position as you once, calling everyone my “friend”, when really they weren’t, and they were not kind. If they want the worst for you, they aren’t your friend.

Keep record of all the messages she’s sending you, if they become abusive or threatening, make sure you report those too. Be aware that whatever you tell your friends might get back to her, so don’t tell them things you would not want her to know; be guarded, keep quiet about how you feel about this person, act like it doesnt matter. Most of the time, they feed off the attention they get in you being upset, so just act unbothered. No responding to her messages, no responding to people asking you about her.

Sometimes being lonely or isolated is the hardest thing, but from first hand experience its so much more peaceful than being in a group that want to catch you out all the time.

Reply 15

Anonymous #4

Blud said 3 years

bullying (please help)

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