Will I get bullied at university for just working hard?
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Everyone at university most definitely does NOT party. I’ve noticed that depending on how challenging a degree is, the more likely people are to take it a bit more seriously and I’ve also noticed that they party much less often due to the fact that they don’t get time to party (they do occasionally party and go out to drink but much less frequently). Don’t feel too intimidated or pressured to drink or party, I would however say that it’s much easier to make friends though. I think it would be a bit more difficult to keep away from people being nasty to you for being “uptight” or whatever for focusing on ur education if you’re planning on living in student accommodation because you’ll most likely be surrounded by a lot of people who party/drink. Some of my friends are like you and they do not get bullied and made fun of. This is mainly because at Uni, people generally keep to themselves and are focused on their own lives and choices, a lot of people go out partying with people they already know etc so bullying is less common but obviously not inevitable. You seem like a genuine person I hope you all the best in life.
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Hello,
Absolutely not, you won’t get bullied for it at all. I know plenty of people who are at university primarily for the degree; people who only party and don’t care so much about their degree will likely get a lower grade as a result. While it’s not uncommon for people to go for just the social aspect, it’s one of many uni lifestyles.
It’s not the same place as a secondary school or sixth form: university is a mature place and you won’t get bullied for focusing on your studies. Take time to find people like you as well! I know people who study hard and party too!
Hope this helps,
Dom
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Hey there! As a fellow second year cyber security student at De Montfort University, I totally understand where you're coming from. It's totally normal to feel anxious or worried about fitting in or being pressured to do things you're not comfortable with, especially when starting a new chapter of your life.
However, I want to reassure you that not everyone at university just parties. While it's true that some students do enjoy partying, there are plenty of others who prefer to focus on their studies or pursue other interests. There are many clubs and societies on campus that cater to a wide variety of interests, so don't be afraid to explore those and find like-minded people.
Remember, university is a time to explore your interests and grow as a person. Don't be afraid to be yourself and pursue your passions, even if they don't align with what others are doing. I wish you all the best in your upcoming studies, and I'm sure you'll find a lot of like minded people !
- Ilya
Nah, if anything you will find a higher % of people who genuinely want to be there. Things tend to calm down after the first few weeks of novelty.
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Hi @itsayme
Firstly, congratulations on getting into university and your target degree!
I’m glad you’re so excited to get stuck in with your course, and I wouldn’t worry about opinions from other people. Most people understand the desire to work hard — after all, you’re paying for this degree. You’ll find the most partying happens during the first year, since it’s a slow amping up in the difficulty of your degree and for some universities, the first year does not count toward your final degree. When it gets to the second year, people tend to calm down and put their heads down more. Those who tend to slack off and overly focus on the partying aspect into the later years tend to be a minority and you’ll find they often come to regret it later on.There’s nothing wrong with being quiet and hardworking and you’ll be absolutely fine!
Hope this helps!
Estelle
Second Year Psychology Student
University of Huddersfield
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Not at all!
A lot of people will be the same and just want to do well. If anything you'll find your group of people who think the same way and make your friends that way. I've just finished my first year of uni and I've never seen anyone in my class be mean to anyone else. You all have an interest in common and there doesn't seem to be (from my experience) any of that kind of high school behaviour.
If I had a top tip it would be to speak to everyone and anyone on your first day. It might be scary but no one knows each other so just hype yourself up and go meet people! Honestly, I've had the best time ever so far at University and Im sure you will too
If you have any more questions please feel free to ask!
- Jessica
1st Year, Computer Science (Artificial Intelligence)
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Hi there @itsayme,
No you don't need to worry about this, it's not the same as school and you'll find the majority of people at university want to work hard and get the best results. Although there is partying and drinking at university, please don't feel pressured to join in if you don't want to, there are lots of other activities to get involved in to make friends like joining a club or society. These are great ways for meeting people who have the same interests as you.
I hope this helps, let me know if you have any questions.
All the best,
Sarah
You will not. I never partied at Uni. I spent most of my days, evenings and nights in the library. To unwind I would go to the cinema, theatre or window shopping. Never got bullied. The people who have stuck it out long enough to go to university are usually mature enough to not use bullying as a pass-time. You’ll be fine.
ETA: I was severely bullied throughout school. University was the best time of my educational life simply because I never got bullied.
ETA: I was severely bullied throughout school. University was the best time of my educational life simply because I never got bullied.
(edited 8 months ago)
Original post by itsayme
I start university next year, everyone I know who is going is just talking about how excited they are to party all the time. This degree means a lot to me and I really want to get into a good career with it, and I’ve never had an interest in partying/drinking. I’m planning on working very hard, but I worry other people will try and peer pressure me to party with them, or will make fun of me for being ‘boring’. I was bullied badly in school for being a quiet, hard working kid so I think it stems from that. But does everyone at university just party???
Hi @itsayme,
Congratulations on starting university next year! Which course are you doing? You sound very passionate about your subject which is amazing!!
I think peoples experiences vary. At university you get to meet a wider range of people than you would at school. You also meet a lot more people so the chances of finding people who are dedicated to the course, do not like to party or drink are probably higher than you might initially think. As someone who does not like to party or drink, I found student group chats helped me meet people initially. It is likely that there will be people on the course who want to start a study group so you could be the first one to do that. I would consider myself very hard working and passionate too. I study Psychology and have gotten myself really involved in the course and to be honest with university I would say you put in what you get. You only have three years so it makes sense to want to make the most of it.
It is okay to be social in ways you enjoy. Going for coffee, dinner or just hanging out in someones kitchen is absolutely fine. There is some social pressure but your true friends will respect your boundaries. I was also called 'boring' my a couple of people but at the end of the day I was creating my own fun and building my own life. I am sorry to hear that you got bullied for it but I hope your hard work is seen more positively at university.
Let me know if you would like for me to talk more about what not drinking/partying at university is like and I would be more than happy to chat with you and others on this.
Alia
University of Kent Student Reps
Uni is the opposite of high school in my opinion.
At high school, you're "cool" if you don't take your grades that seriously and instead prioritise having fun & living life.
It's the other way around in uni. People are paying good money to be there. People are working on a better future for themselves.
You will NOT be bullied for working too hard at uni; instead, I'd say it's quite respectable.
At high school, you're "cool" if you don't take your grades that seriously and instead prioritise having fun & living life.
It's the other way around in uni. People are paying good money to be there. People are working on a better future for themselves.
You will NOT be bullied for working too hard at uni; instead, I'd say it's quite respectable.
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