The Student Room Group

Am I just a rebound to him or could this be serious?

He messaged me immediately after breaking up with his girlfriend, who he even lived with for few years. I've only seen him three times so far, and once he briefly spoke to me when he was still with her. He's 25 by the way. He often looked at me and even stood behind me, which was quite noticeable. He's been my crush for a while.
He takes a long time to reply, usually 4-15 hours, but when he does, he writes lengthy and very personal stuff about his feelings and he's told me about how his girlfriend was mentally abusive. Several times he suggested that we should do something together, and now he made a plan, but not for another 3 weeks for some reason. The location is set, but no exact date.
Do you think this could be something serious, or is he just seeking comfort or does he just want to be friends?
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous #1
He messaged me immediately after breaking up with his girlfriend, who he even lived with for few years. I've only seen him three times so far, and once he briefly spoke to me when he was still with her. He's 25 by the way. He often looked at me and even stood behind me, which was quite noticeable. He's been my crush for a while.
He takes a long time to reply, usually 4-15 hours, but when he does, he writes lengthy and very personal stuff about his feelings and he's told me about how his girlfriend was mentally abusive. Several times he suggested that we should do something together, and now he made a plan, but not for another 3 weeks for some reason. The location is set, but no exact date.
Do you think this could be something serious, or is he just seeking comfort or does he just want to be friends?

ask his friends for their opinion
Reply 2
Original post by Anonymous #1
He messaged me immediately after breaking up with his girlfriend, who he even lived with for few years. I've only seen him three times so far, and once he briefly spoke to me when he was still with her. He's 25 by the way. He often looked at me and even stood behind me, which was quite noticeable. He's been my crush for a while.
He takes a long time to reply, usually 4-15 hours, but when he does, he writes lengthy and very personal stuff about his feelings and he's told me about how his girlfriend was mentally abusive. Several times he suggested that we should do something together, and now he made a plan, but not for another 3 weeks for some reason. The location is set, but no exact date.
Do you think this could be something serious, or is he just seeking comfort or does he just want to be friends?

He's also given me few compliments and he always likes my stories and all that when I post my face for example
Reply 3
Original post by yttab
ask his friends for their opinion

My friend dated him 10 years ago when they were both like 15 and she told me I should go for it and that he's kind, another friend who knows him told me he's childish and another friend also told me he's good and that we would be cute but like they're my friends of course they're gonna tell me what I want to hear
Original post by Anonymous #1
He messaged me immediately after breaking up with his girlfriend, who he even lived with for few years. I've only seen him three times so far, and once he briefly spoke to me when he was still with her. He's 25 by the way. He often looked at me and even stood behind me, which was quite noticeable. He's been my crush for a while.
He takes a long time to reply, usually 4-15 hours, but when he does, he writes lengthy and very personal stuff about his feelings and he's told me about how his girlfriend was mentally abusive. Several times he suggested that we should do something together, and now he made a plan, but not for another 3 weeks for some reason. The location is set, but no exact date.
Do you think this could be something serious, or is he just seeking comfort or does he just want to be friends?


None of us have your answer. Maybe he can only make 3 weeks work because of his life (work etc). Only you would be able to know that though.

If you want my advice, as others have given different descriptions of him - just make your own judgements on how you and him get on. It’s you and him that hold the relation at the end of the day, whatever that may be.
Why on earth would someone think to message a virtual stranger immediately after breaking up with their girlfriend? How does he know of you? Can you trust what he's said about her?

What do you mean about him looking at you and standing behind you; where and why?

If you think your friends are telling you what you want to hear, isn't he doing the same with compliments? They're a bit meaningless and it's a better indication if you can actually hold a face-to-face conversation.

These things about his behaviour don't add up and I think I'm with your friend who says he's childish...
Original post by Anonymous #1
He messaged me immediately after breaking up with his girlfriend, who he even lived with for few years. I've only seen him three times so far, and once he briefly spoke to me when he was still with her. He's 25 by the way. He often looked at me and even stood behind me, which was quite noticeable. He's been my crush for a while.
He takes a long time to reply, usually 4-15 hours, but when he does, he writes lengthy and very personal stuff about his feelings and he's told me about how his girlfriend was mentally abusive. Several times he suggested that we should do something together, and now he made a plan, but not for another 3 weeks for some reason. The location is set, but no exact date.
Do you think this could be something serious, or is he just seeking comfort or does he just want to be friends?

He just wants to have sex with you

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