question about a situation

lillie white

What would you think if you started speaking to someone and then they looked nervous and can't respond?

Reply 1

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

I’d probably assume that either my question had stumped them or that they were nervous/socially anxious.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by lillie white

What would you think if you started speaking to someone and then they looked nervous and can't respond?

Depends on the context.

In my personal experience, it can mean I should hold back more to make her at ease or try to make the person more comfortable. Some people might think the person is weak and they might have the "upper hand". It varies from person to person.
If the person is trying to talk but couldn't, then I would either leave the situation to make the person more comfortable or try to think of something that they can talk about or can talk for ages about.

If the person is nervous but coming across in a way of entitled, expects me to worship them, or expects me to read their minds, then I would get angry (it's also a way of playing hard to get and they're mind games). It's a form of narcissm, and it's psychologically speaking their way of compensating their feeling of inadequacy. It's also a way of insulting me as a person.

If you're nervous, it doesn't exempt you from conventional social rules and basic etiquette. So long you're trying and you're keeping standards, I don't think anyone can blame you for it.

If you're asking in terms of forming friendships or relationships, then it's not likely that anything would happen. For any relationship to form, you would need conversation or communication of some form or another. If no dialogue is present, no relationship would form.
Polite communication in any form is almost better than dead silence (flag signals, sign language, speaking a completely foreign language). Less than ideal conversations (boring, a little crass, irrelevant) are a lot better than no conversation.

In more cases than none, the person being silent is overthinking it. The person they are speaking to is also another human. So long the person is human (or at least down to earth), they are willing to talk to anyone.

Whilst first impressions are a big factor, it's not as a big deal as most people think. Whatever bad impression you made, you can still make up for it with 7 good ones after the initial impression.

The best social conversationalist isn't perfect. It's normal to be nervous, but it shouldn't stop people from connecting.