Should I be wasting my energy crying about this?

My exams are nearing and I NEED to revise. I have a baby sister and of course my mum has to prioritise her and i get that. But this means that while my mum is doing the household work I have to look after my sister. At this point, It feels as if I have become the mum because im tackling both household things as well as my sister and my studies all at the same time.

I get that every person has a problem and i should get over this but my mum doesn't even acknowledge the time I spend doing the household things instead of my studies when i should be revising. Because of this, my last mocks were horrendous with just grade 6s in everything. I went down 2 grades in EVERYTHING.

My mum said she doesn't care if i get low grades but my grades mean a lot for me. My mum never experienced higher education and neither did my dad, so I haven't ever asked for anything from them because i know its difficult to manage the costs.

So i want to have a successful career and also go onto higher education because I am capable of it. It just breaks my heart that my parents don't have the same viewpoint as me even though Ive tried explaining so many times. I want to become a lawyer and i told my dad but he just said it takes too long to become one and you wont be earning any money until you do become one so he wants me to be a accountant by an apprenticeship.

I did some research and found out about degree apprenticeships so I told him about that but the look on his face just said he doesn't understand and believes that degrees are a waste of time.

Ive been able to remain calm and not dwell on it too much, but sometimes I just breakdown and have a panic attack. Then after its over I just think that its all my fault somehow. Maybe I'm just overreacting. Should I be wasting my energy with my emotions like this or should I just keep it to myself until I have some say and can move out or something?

Reply 1

toothysmile

You can do law apprecticeships as well! Maybe you can talk to your dad about this potentially: https://www.lawsociety.org.uk/career-advice/becoming-a-solicitor/qualifying-without-a-degree/apprenticeships

(edited 2 months ago)

Reply 2

toothysmile

...But on another note - it seems you need to try have a discussion with your parents. Explain to your parents your thoughts and make sure to call them out if they immediately shut down your ideas (<- identifying this really helps with discussions), tell them at the end of the day it is your life so you should be able to make your own career/ uni decisions

(edited 2 months ago)

Reply 3

MysteryyyGirl86

yes, you should definitely explain things to your parents, and no you're not overreacting. it's perfectly normal to have a breakdown with all that stress, and your parents should be understanding and only want the best for you

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by MysteryyyGirl86

Yeh so I tried to have a discussion and they said that I don't even know what real stress is and if I am like this now how will I handle my future 🥲🥲. So that's that I guess.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous #1

Yeh so I tried to have a discussion and they said that I don't even know what real stress is and if I am like this now how will I handle my future 🥲🥲. So that's that I guess.

I also have parents who don't recognise or "believe" in stress especially during teenage years. I get how you feel and I think the best way to tackle it is ask them to help you handle your stress in a practical way. Tell them that your stress is an emotion you feel when you feel overwhelmed and ask them to help you manage it by perhaps allowing you to spend more time on revision or taking off some of the household chores temporarily so you can try and do well.

You can also talk to them about the research you've done and what you're interested in - also say that you want to do well in your education and if they start saying they don't care, tell them that you care about it and make them understand. It's not right for any parent to not support their child in education.

Reply 6

MysteryyyGirl86

Original post by Anonymous #1

Yeh so I tried to have a discussion and they said that I don't even know what real stress is and if I am like this now how will I handle my future 🥲🥲. So that's that I guess.