The Student Room Group

Regret moving out for uni?

I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?

If you have two universities to choose from, the closest of which is 3 hours from home, then you're moving out. (Or you're not going to uni.) Decision made.
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?

Hi there,
Moving away from home for the first time can be daunting but you're not alone. The decision is ultimately up to you but it may be worth asking yourself, would you be happier living closer to home? Are there universities near you where you could still move out but be closer to your family? Or is the course and opportunities better at your two choices?

There are so many benefits to moving out for uni, so I'd say go for it!

-Nicky
As above, neither are a commutable distance so your decision is really between these unis or declining both offers and tring to find something nearer via Extra or Clearing.
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?

Hi there,

As your universities are quite far away, I'm not sure it would be possible to commute as it would take a long time and a lot of money. I would say if you decide you are set on living at home to try and find a uni closer to you through clearing and go from there.

However, I would say that there are lots of positives about moving out for uni!

You get a lot of independence and freedom that you don't get at home! You can do what you like and go out to places whenever you want.

You learn new skills such as cooking and cleaning for yourself. Also things such as budgeting money is such an important life skill that I feel like you really learn when you are living away from home.

You meet lots of new people! It's so fun meeting new people and making friends and there are a lot more opportunities to do this if you move out.

You are close to uni so don't have a big commute which saves a lot of time and money!


I hope some of this helps!

Lucy -SHU student ambassador.
Reply 5
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?


I am from a religious and traditional family and moved out 3hs away and it was great for my development there's no doubt about it and I still stayed on track with respecting my cultural and religious boundaries that I would have had if I had stayed at home (but I did have a better social life lol). However, once 3rd year came, I really wanted to go back home. It was definitely great with developing myself and I wouldnt be who I am if I had stayed at home, however, it is hard moving away especially with family orientated families. For example, my friends are all from my background and we all had moved out and a friend of mine, her mother was diagnosed with cancer and ofc because she was far, it was hard to fully be there for her and it was costly to keep going back and forth. My other friends sister got really unwell during university and my other friends parents marriage got difficult. I also had difficulties pop up during the 3 years and its why I wanted to go home, I don't know what's going to happen with anyones health or whether anyone lives or dies so the time I am unmarried, I would rather spend it with my family.

Anyone from my background I have met during uni has really missed their family and developed a newfound appreciation for them. Also distance has improved some family relations.

I think 5hs is too far. I moved out 3h away and it was just enough for me. You can set off at 5pm and be there for 8ishpm. Going back home 5hs away would have you commuting for half a day and itll be difficult coming back and forth when you miss home.

Also, consult with your family if you can.
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?

Hi,
It's completely understandable to feel torn between the desire for freedom and the comfort of being close to family, especially if you come from a strict and religious background. Moving out for university can be an exciting opportunity to gain independence and meet different types of people that will aid in your personal growth. I understand the conflicting feelings that you are going through right now, and it’s important to recognise that there is no right or wrong decision in terms of moving out for university.

Before making a decision:

1.

Research the universities and check if there is a support system for students from similar backgrounds. This can ensure a sense of solidarity and belonging in a new environment and can give you practical advice.

2.

Think about the option of virtually staying in contact with your family through phone calls and video chats.

3.

Think about going into clearing. Like others have said, perhaps it’s better for you to find a university that is nearer. This will give you the opportunity to experience freedom while being within reach of your family’s support.

4.

Explore the possibility of going home during the weekends and living on campus during the week. This can aid in easing you into university life and perhaps you won’t feel scared anymore after moving away.

Remember that there is no answer that is one size fits all and make sure to trust yourself in making a decision for this next chapter of your life. it is okay to feel nervous or uncertain in your journey towards adulthood and independence.

Good luck in making the best decision for yourself!
Jainaba
(edited 2 months ago)
Original post by Taki12
I am currently thinking of moving out for uni, I have two universities to choose from, and both being 3 and 5 hours away from me. I am still on the fence about moving out. I want to move out due to the freedom you get (I have a very strict and religious family and going out was barely an option for me), but being so far from my family makes me scared and reconsider.

If you were in my shoes, would you move out?

@Taki12

The two universities that you are thinking about are far away, so it sounds you do want to move away for university, as otherwise it's likely that you would have considered universities closer to you. It is difficult to move away for the first time, especially if your social life has been family orientated, but if you choose to stay at home, it's likely that things will largely stay the same.

If you choose to go to university far away, then you will have the chance to grow as a person, to make your own decisions and to be an adult, but don't just go far away to go far away! Go to the university which is great for the course that you want to study and has other things that are important to you e.g. the location, accommodation etc...Think about the place where you could spend three years contentedly : )

All the best,

Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield

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