Post-breakup, what to do?
Hola amigos,
I feel rather embarrassed posting on a forum about this kind of problem but I thought some real outside opinions might help.
My girlfriend of 9 months recently finished with me for reasons of her own. She's currently a third year student at University and is really feeling the strain. Around a month ago, just as she was preparing to begin her disseration, she had a complete breakdown on me; tears everywhere, saying she just "couldn't cope with anything anymore". Something in her life needed to give way and being as practical minded as she is, that 'thing' was me.
Two weeks on and she shows no remorse or guilt whereas I am pretty devastated. She apparently wants to remain friends, though at the moment she seems to be doing everything in her power to prevent that. She talks to me like **** and has put up a really cold front towards me - need I remind her that she finished with me?! I'm feeling very mixed emotions right now. Mostly anger. I know it's always supposed to be easier on the one doing 'the dumping' but after a lengthy relationship with me you think she'd be a little more concerned.
I love that girl like hell and she apparently still loves me, though she's never been a particularly emotional person, I accept her for who she is and trust her no end. She's made it clear that she can't see herselft being in a relationship any time soon and that she doesn't want me to wait around for her. She even asked me to "hurry up and hate [her] so could move on"
Really don't know how to respond to this situation. I can't say that I want to move on... Little help? No trolls please.
Eddy
I feel rather embarrassed posting on a forum about this kind of problem but I thought some real outside opinions might help.
My girlfriend of 9 months recently finished with me for reasons of her own. She's currently a third year student at University and is really feeling the strain. Around a month ago, just as she was preparing to begin her disseration, she had a complete breakdown on me; tears everywhere, saying she just "couldn't cope with anything anymore". Something in her life needed to give way and being as practical minded as she is, that 'thing' was me.
Two weeks on and she shows no remorse or guilt whereas I am pretty devastated. She apparently wants to remain friends, though at the moment she seems to be doing everything in her power to prevent that. She talks to me like **** and has put up a really cold front towards me - need I remind her that she finished with me?! I'm feeling very mixed emotions right now. Mostly anger. I know it's always supposed to be easier on the one doing 'the dumping' but after a lengthy relationship with me you think she'd be a little more concerned.
I love that girl like hell and she apparently still loves me, though she's never been a particularly emotional person, I accept her for who she is and trust her no end. She's made it clear that she can't see herselft being in a relationship any time soon and that she doesn't want me to wait around for her. She even asked me to "hurry up and hate [her] so could move on"
Really don't know how to respond to this situation. I can't say that I want to move on... Little help? No trolls please.
Eddy
(edited 13 years ago)
i really dnt know what to say, sorry 
Original post by I-love-life i really dnt know what to say, sorry
i really dnt know what to say, sorry With this being such a delicate time for you, wouldnt it help to keep away from H&R threads? Everytime I see your username, my heart just breaks because of the things that have been happening to you
And I can really imagine what you're feeling inside everytime you post..
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by katyness
With this being such a delicate time for you, wouldnt it help to keep away from H&R threads? Everytime I see your username, my heart just breaks because of the things that have been hapening to you
And I can really imagine what you're feeling inside everytime you post..
And I can really imagine what you're feeling inside everytime you post..
yh but what else can i do, at least i get to hear other ppl's problems and some amusing threads that just help get through each second of the day, i really dont know what else i can do right now,
Original post by I-love-life
yh but what else can i do, at least i get to hear other ppl's problems and some amusing threads that just help get through each second of the day, i really dont know what else i can do right now,
:l you are brave.
I'd be on the floor in tears with music bursting on my ears. I want to be like you when I grow up.
Original post by katyness
:l you are brave.
I'd be on the floor in tears with music bursting on my ears. I want to be like you when I grow up.
I'd be on the floor in tears with music bursting on my ears. I want to be like you when I grow up.
trust me ive cried so much today that i feel lyk there are no tears left to cry anymore
thanks, xxShe sounds like a mess, just move on with your life dude (as hard as it might be).
Original post by eddiemate
My girlfriend of 9 months recently finished with me for reasons of her own.
Two weeks on and she shows no remorse or guilt whereas I am pretty devastated. She apparently wants to remain friends.
talks to me like **** and has put up a really cold front towards me .
but after a lengthy relationship with me you think she'd be a little more concerned
She even asked me to "hurry up and hate [her] so could move on"
My girlfriend of 9 months recently finished with me for reasons of her own.
Two weeks on and she shows no remorse or guilt whereas I am pretty devastated. She apparently wants to remain friends.
talks to me like **** and has put up a really cold front towards me .
but after a lengthy relationship with me you think she'd be a little more concerned
She even asked me to "hurry up and hate [her] so could move on"
"It's not over until the fat lady sings"
Don't mean to be rude but I think she has and the tune is over. It’s time to move on with your life.
As far as the lengthy relationship is concerned, try explaining that to those that have been in a relationship that eventually failed after years. Assuming this result was inevitable, you are lucky to have it end this soon.
Time to get this one out of your head and move on.
Best Wishes
Cheers for all your advice guys! The general concensus has been to just 'move on'. Very difficult, but I'll try my best. I have the niggling feeling in the back of my head that I want me and her to work a couple months down the line, that maybe she'll take me back? But I don't want to get my hopes up just to let myself down again. I can't say I'll be cutting her out of my life completely, it seems cowardly of me. That and we share a group of friends, so it's not going to be as simple as that! It's a very tough situation but I'm trying to take it on the chin.
Are you a troll or something? I've seen this exact story (I think) a month back.
Completely cut contact, at least for a while. She's gone off with another guy, so you definatly deserve better! I'm not saying go out and find another girl, but distract yourself.
If you can't bear to delete her number, then write it down and delete it out of your phone. It'll save those drunk texts.... trust me.
If you can't bear to delete her number, then write it down and delete it out of your phone. It'll save those drunk texts.... trust me.
Refer to this thread for the answer: http://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=1489253
Original post by eddiemate
Well it turns out she ****ed another guy on Friday - just over a month after we broke up. I'm still in love with her. I can't see the 'friends' thing working now. Seriously contemplating the elimination of contact now. Or should I bite the bullet and see it through. Thoughts?
Seriously just move on, cut her out, you could do so much better than her and be much happier
Original post by StephenP91
Are you a troll or something? I've seen this exact story (I think) a month back.
No, I'm not a troll - at least not here
If you look at the top you'll see it was me that posted (a month ago 
)Original post by linkdapink
Completely cut contact, at least for a while. She's gone off with another guy, so you definatly deserve better! I'm not saying go out and find another girl, but distract yourself.
If you can't bear to delete her number, then write it down and delete it out of your phone. It'll save those drunk texts.... trust me.
If you can't bear to delete her number, then write it down and delete it out of your phone. It'll save those drunk texts.... trust me.
Cheers for that mate. I've given her an ultimatum - if she can't explain herself to me and convince me to stay as friends with her, then tonight I will cut the contact. I live very close to her this is the only issue. We'll always be in close proximity and will invetibly cross each other in the streets/bump into each other in a club.
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