How to not be a prick to a girl I like

Smiling at someone makes you a prick now? Damn I'm out of touch.

Offer her munchies. Yum Yum

No but I'm CONSTANTLY smiling, I can never take her seriously- or when I try to, I just end up smiling. It's damn annoying

I'd start off by dragging her aside or getting her on FB chat or something, and telling her you feel like you've taken your jokes a bit too far and you're reeeeeeeeeeeealllllly sorry if you've offended her with anything you've said. Gauge where you go next from her reaction to that, but try and move the conversation smoothly around going for a drink sometime, so you can prove that you're not really an arse.

Yeh, I think I did offend her today. her mum's back in Afghanistan (where she comes from, not the safest place), and I called a big fat bald man I'd filmed on the train 'your mum', so I think she took it the wrong way.

She's never on FB.

We get on really well in texting though

OK, so there's this girl I think I kinda fancy. She's hilarious, but whenever I talk to her I'm always a prick, either smiling or laughing at her, or taking the piss. I need to say some funny stuff to impress her. Any ideas oon funny stuff, or how to stop being an idiot?

Wow... way to go mate.

"I need to say some funny stuff to impress her"
no
"to impress her"
no

You know what a girl definitely doesn't want? A guy who wants to impress her and builds his world around the girl.
Chill the **** out. Don't think so much. Trust your instinct and let it flow.

Rather than funny, be playful. Rather than impressing her, create a nice atmosphere for BOTH of you. Let her do her part, and you do yours.
It's not like the girl is just sitting there waiting for you to get through with your freak show to then hold up a number from one to ten.

Be genuine (yes, this is not a myth you can go very far and do that enjoyably by being genuine).

Sometimes I joke around some ****, and then just say "you're fun", or "I bet you're wearing sexy underwear!"

The process of flirting is not like the logical chronology of a book. It's more like steering a boat, you know where you got to go, but there are some other nice places you'd like to see, you might get in a storm but as long as your boat doesn't sink you can still get to the end. Besides, a storm makes it more interesting.

There is nothing more boring than approaching a girl and knowing after five minutes that you will sleep with her if you wanted to.

You need to put that joint down dude

Give her a quick text man, just let her know how sorry you are for what you said

You know what a girl definitely doesn't want? A guy who wants to impress her and builds his world around the girl.
Chill the **** out. Don't think so much. Trust your instinct and let it flow.

Now why would you say that?

I have this whole pride thing going on. I know I've upset her, but she doesn't know I know, and I'm pretending I didn't notice. Also, at the end of the day, my group of friends left the school without her, leaving her to get the bus by herself, and it was my fault because I persuaded them to go.